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This is a wonderful FF. Thanks for that. You are doing a very good job of fitting Ridhima's and Arman's past reactions to what she actually would be feeling + extrapolating the future with the help of this curves that fitted. You have also curve fitted Arman's reactions. And I must say you have done a wonderful job, from the point of view of a person sympathetic towards woman and her position. In this context I would like to paste a para that I said long time back in one of my posts
This is like "curve fitting" in our research world. We have noisy observations of a system's output, we don't know the law governing the behaviour of the system. Then we try to fit a known curve: we choose that curve as the behaviour which has fits best with the observations, i.e., error between the observations and the observation obtained using that curve is minimum. The curve describing the behaviour will depend upon the set of known curves that you were considering.
The scenes are noisy observations of the Ridz behaviour/feelings. We depending upon our favourism try to fit a known behaviour pattern as hers.
But I have few complaints
1) Why did you kill Shilpa and her husband? There is something called Katha Nyayam, i.e., justice to a character. May be you could have got to this point in story in another way. Why poor Shilpa's life has to have so many sad moments and twists?
2) Why Sid is alone till today ? It is not quite convincing me. I might have been more convinced, if you could have shown that he actually lost belief in relationships, because of the way things ended. I mean if Ridz has choose Arman in the begining itself, he would have moved on as his belief in relations would not have died then. But with her convincing Sid to a great extent that she loves him, she taking so many extereme steps to prove that she wants only him and in the end butchering it to be a drama, will actually leave the other person totally not believe in any future relations and the actions of the future possible close associations. I mean he will not belive when a woman comes, showers interest towards him, after Ridz incident, as he will keep questioning the other person's hidden motives. Further, again there is no Katha nyayam here.
This is just my POV and please take it as a constructive criticism.
But I just loved the way you extrapolated Ridz and Arman's future relationship. That is on spot. But friend, there is too much sadness, which holds the audience like a glue and at the same time pains us.
The most important thing: I think you can become an excellent writer. Just think little more while formulating the story and you can do wonders. Please don't stop after this. You have very good vision, writing and understanding skills.
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hum saath saath hai part 90 updates pg 16
Author: mithilalovesksg Replies: 166 Views: 30639
|mithilalovesksg||166||30639||22 June 2013 at 7:16am by loveuarmaanu|
AR FF : Hum Saath Saath Hain "imp.note=63"28/9
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|Riddss||503||83271||28 September 2009 at 8:03am by Riddss|
hum saath saath hai ar ff with others also
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|mithilalovesksg||25||6909||08 April 2009 at 7:57am by Riddss|
Hum Saath Saath Hain
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|am_786||13||5285||30 November 2006 at 6:40pm by brainychild92|
Hum Hum Saath Saath Hain *KSBKBT*
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|mizzdesi||7||3056||18 July 2006 at 11:56am by Krishana Tulsi|
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