Har pal her lamha, main kaise sehta hoon
Har pal her lamha main khud se yeh kehta rehta hoon
He sat there in the dark corner of his room, his eyes just looking at the water sliding down the window pane. With every ticking second of the clock, the graveness of the words she had said seemed to be finally sinking in. Yet, he didn't want to comprehend..
Do pal tujh se juda thha,
A lone tear escaped his eye. He was just reminded of their firsts .. the first glance, the first confession, the first touch, the first kiss, the first fight. There was a certain warmth, craziness, ecstasy like butterflies in your stomach.. that feeling that contents the heart, the feeling of having the priceless thing in the world, that security that thing - that thing called love. They connected, it was a different world altogether for them, just the two of them.
Aise phir rasta muda thha,
And then he was jerked off the fairy tale dream. Reality dawned, she had to leave and he knew that from the very beginning. It wasn't her fault neither his. They had to part and it was time for the lasts. The last look, the last bitter-sweet moments, the last moment of having her, her presence in his life.
Tujh se main khone laga,
Juda jaise hone laga,
Mujh se kuch mera
With her leave, he sat there trying to put scattered pieces of his life, scattered pieces of him together, but in vain. There was a void in him, that only she could fill and that void seemed to have left him hollowed from within. He was helpless, maybe destiny and fate had this in store for them. And there was no one to blame.
Teri yaadon mein likhte jo lafz dete hai sunaai
beete lamhe poochhte hain kyun hue aise juda.. khuda,
Her memories, their memories, were a lifetime. It gave the feeling of utmost content, of having everything. The heart felt young, which just leapt like a kid in joy. But, he had lost everything and the emptiness filled in. The way a bud blossoms into a flower, after nourishment of warmth from sunlight, fill from the seed, and care from the gardener, similarly their relationship blossomed from the craziness of falling in love to the mellowness of understanding.
Khuda mila jo yeh faisla hain
Khuda tera hi yeh faisla hain
Khuda hona tha woh ho gaya
Jo tune thha likha
The past came across with the present facts and a certain pain shot up in his heart. He was vulnerable, he was helpless. Some questions can never be answered, and so was his question ' 'why?'.
Tujhe bhula diya, ho
Phir kyun teri yaadon ne
Mujhe rula diya.. ho'
Tears had been incessantly dripping down his face. The pain would not stop, the memories would not fade.. But life had to move on.. Wiping his tears dry, he got up rather tried to get up. His weak knees, and a heartbroken him, didn't support that, and he sat down again helpless. With her memories still haunting in his mind he broke into uncontrollable sobs. Vulnerable, yet desperately trying to forget but he was helpless.
He lay down on the floor, listless, emotionless staring at the ceiling. He had sobered down after the tears. The sadness was still there, but the frustration seemed to have calmed down. He closed his burning eyes, the eyes of want, and fell into deep slumber, having a hope of a new tomorrow. He knew there wasn't going to be any tomorrow for them, but still he had faith in himself. He knew that it wouldn't be the same anymore, he wouldn't be someone's anymore, but still, he knew that he needed to stitch scattered pieces of himself, for life wouldn't stop. It had to go on.Gham ka yeh pal guzar jaayega ,Phir koi humsafar Aayega..His past memories could be remembered as an interlude, an enchantingly beautiful phase of his life, but he had to build himself up for a new dawn, for a new life. Moments could pass away, and words could be forgotten but memories could never fade away, they always would linger. Baatein bhul jaate hain, yaadein, yaad aati hai..