OMG Jiju u write so well 👏 u should write an FF like Lovy Di keep it up it was beautifulThis content was originally posted by: Adi4Ayu
Promise
She wasn't breathing. My heart tore as I screamed her name. I could feel pain as I shouted - a pain that pulled from deep inside of me. I could almost feel it trying to kill me from the inside out. I had to make sure that I kept it locked away and focus on the life withering away in my arms.
I tried to find a pulse, fumbling through her wrist, never finding one. Then, I tried CPR for the first time in my life - for my life. I whispered her name with each push on her chest. Did I make it to 100 per minute? I still don't know - I didn't count.
She gasped and opened her eyes - for a moment too brief. But I could tell from her eyes that she was afraid. Afraid of death? No! She was afraid of me - her eyes couldn't see me in pain, regardless of what she was going through. I know that if it would have been in her hands, she would be up and about in no time - just to see the happiness return to my eyes.
"Sweetheart, you'll be fine, okay baby?"
She just nodded. That's what she has been doing since then. The doctors admitted her to the ICU when her respiratory system didn't respond to the treatments. Before leaving her side, I told her that she was going to be fine. She nodded again.
Two days later, she was shifted to a private room. She had regained consciousness after 15 hours. I really don't know why, but I was angry with her - really angry. Anger gave me strength to fight my emotions - stop my tears. I scolded her when she told me that she was feeling sleepy. She held my hand to her chest and cried - her tears complaining about my rudeness - my heartlessness. She didn't sleep.
She wanted to eat ice-cream and chocolates. I scolded her again, gently this time, promising that she would gets lots of chocolates when she came back home. She smiled. She didn't whine for chocolates again.
"You are upset."
I was reading MKRM on my lappy.
"Of course I am. You've just given Armaan four hours to live."
"Why do you read the death-scene when it upsets you so much?"
"It is not a death-scene. It's a life-scene. Armaan will survive against all odds. There'll be a happy ending to this scene."
"Yes, because it's just a story."
I knew what she was heeding to. I didn't want to listen so I turned my attention back to MKRM.
"Will I survive too?"
"You are getting better. The doctors will discharge you soon."
I didn't have the courage to lie blatantly, so I told her my well-rehearsed lie - a lie that I had told her so many times that it actually seemed far more convincing than the harsh truth - even for me.
"I am going to die."
She wasn't asking me, just telling. Her innocent eyes were set carefully upon me. Her hands were playing with the ring in my finger. Her mehendi was still dark, though it was going to be almost two weeks since our wedding. She continued.
"There will be no happy endings for us."
I lost my temper again that day. Tears were streaming down her face but I couldn't feel them. I could feel the sting of my tears in my eyes but it didn't matter. I wanted her to believe my lie. I wanted her to be strong. I wanted her to live. I lied to her again and again, telling her she was fine. She didn't believe me but she nodded each time I assured her. I couldn't meet her eyes after that.
Today, she knows everything. When I went and hugged her, she pushed me away and looked into my eyes. I couldn't breathe.
"You lied."
I kissed her forehead. She kept crying.
"I'll die. You know that!"
"You won't! That's all I know!"
"Don't lie to me!"
"I'm not lying to you!"
"You are! To me and to yourself!"
"YOU ARE GOING TO BE FINE."
I had yelled at the top of my voice. Her parents, the doctor and the two nurses rushed inside on hearing the shout. The doctor did a customary check-up while her father placed a hand firmly on my shoulder.
"Come with me, Adi."
I shrugged off his hand roughly - rudely. I didn't want anyone to calm me down. Anger was my strength.
"I'm alright. I want to talk to her."
I wasn't trying to be rude. I really didn't think there was anything wrong with me. No one protested.
"Five minutes."
The doctor warned me and left. Others followed him. I moved towards the bed when I heard her speak.
"I don't want to talk to you."
I sat down on the bed and took her left hand in mine. Her face was expressionless.
"I would love to do the talking today for a change."
She finally showed a hint of expression. She scowled. I smiled. She turned her face away.
"Do you know how much I love you?"
She didn't answer.
"You can just say yes or no."
"Yes."
"Do you love me too?"
"Yes."
"Then I want you to believe me when I say that you are going to be fine."
She slowly turned her head and aligned her gaze to mine. I looked away.
"I want you to be fine. I can't lose you. You're the only one I have."
She took my hand to her lips and kissed it. Her lips were warm and soft - a sign that she was alive. My lies seemed true enough. She was going to be fine.
"I would always be there for you - dead or alive."
"Please!"
I protested.
"You will take care of everyone, won't you? You've got to be there for them."
"I will be where you are."
"You've got to live Adi."
"I will live, and so would you."
She was looking intently at me. I turned my gaze away.
"You are going to be fine."
She smiled. I wasn't expecting that. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply. I thought she had believed me again.
"Look into my eyes and repeat what you just said."
Silence.
"Look into my eyes and speak Adi. Make me believe you."
Her voice plagued me as I opened my eyes. The pain was killing me, and I could feel my heart thumping in protest. I took deep breaths and waited for my breathing to pace down before I reached out and touched her face lightly. My anger couldn't help her survive. My love would.
"You will be fine. I promise."
Silence.
"Ayu?"
She smiled and nodded.
"I will live for you."
"For me?"
She indicated the rings gleaming in our entwined hands.
"Your promises are mine to keep."
Writing this story, I know she will help me keep my promise. She will live. We will have our happy ending for sure. But, of course, that will be quite another story! Right now, my life is waiting for me, so, excuse me.
-Aditya Kashyap
This content was originally posted by: Sajan_EktaHey Mehak,
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Hey AashiThis content was originally posted by: ...Aashi...
Being Friendless
Anvita's pov-
Life seems to be a stranger. Actually, I don't really know what life does, and how it does. I mean, I have never been the expecting types; all I wanted was the same things that common people love, but I guess I was wrong.
Who knows what changes occur. I had my own share of experiences, my own happy as well as sad moments. Well, moving away has never been an issue, but I had been excited. Excited to move on and make new friends. There was pain of loosing the older ones, but more happiness to find new ones.
Happiness shone in my eyes,
Dreams soared in the sky.
I had pretty much expectation,
I had a firm determination.
I still remember the first day, when I stepped in this school, with thousands of emotions, expectations, dreams and aspirations of making new friends. But maybe it's the law of nature that one can't remain happy for long. Surely, I made some friends, but they were fake. Whenever I said that I am alone , everybody used to say that they are there with me , And I used to think that they are right , but no , they always proved me wrong !
I remember how I have cried due to the games played on me. I showed that it didn't matter to me, while it did hurt me. I am a human for God sake! I have emotions too; I just bottle up everything inside me. They say that I am pretty melodramatic and fake, but I am not. It's they who don't consider me worthy of their friendship.
Who said that I was strong,
I was vulnerable and wrong.
To consider them as my friends,
Who cared for nothing except fashion trends.
It's been four year in this school, but I still aspire for a true friend. A friend who would understand me, who can tolerate me, who can listen to me every time, who gives me a shoulder to cry, who can inspire and encourage me, and mostly, a friend who likes me the way I am.
I have been through various ups and downs. They gave me a title which I don't want to disclose just because I made friends who were of my age group. I didn't want to be alone. I wanted to have a set of fellow mates, whom I can call friends. They played various games on me, made me cry so hard that my eyes were red.
Times and times I have cried,
With no one to console me,
Still I am waiting for someone,
Who can love me.
Many a times, I have even slept weeping. It's not that I can take it anymore. It's just more than enough. And then they have the audacity to say to me that I should not take it to my heart. Why? Why do they think that they can walk all over me like anything? I mean, I know that I let them, but still, they have no right to do so.
I am going to change. Change a bit for my own good. I have to change, but still I don't change. God knows why, but I can never change. I am the same old Anvita. Hell! I don't know why I can't change for once. I mean, when I would get tired of being hurt.
I don't know why, but I still share my feelings with people around me and trust them blindly. Then they break my trust and laugh at my own face! How easy it is to form groups and say that you are not a part of our group, but how difficult is it to hold back emotions.
Holding back emotions is so not nice,
You have to lie and fake pose a smile.
It pains you to be like that,
Where you have to bear all bad.
It is really difficult to fake a smile in front of everyone and post that everything is great, while it hurts like hell. It really hurts when someone ignores you, just because you are alone and 'un-cool' according to them! I hate myself for spoiling my relationship with my teacher, just because they called me "teacher's pet."
They just used me as a puppet in their hands and I did what they said. I thought that one day they would love me, but, I was mistaken. Hearts of stones don't bear fruits of love. Who loves to sit in the class alone, with no one to talk to? None.
They just used me as a puppet in their hands and I did what they said. I thought that one day they would love me, but, I was mistaken. Hearts of stones don't bear fruits of love. Who loves to sit in the class alone, with no one to talk to? No one.
It's really strange that when your heart breaks,
It is only you who can feel the pain.
Others can never hear the noise,
It just breaks and shatters you inside.
My class boys treat me as untouchable, and make faces at me. I don't belong to lower class people, and as far as looks are concerned, I have a fair skin, I just wear a spectacle. According to my sister, I am the most beautiful girl in the world, which I am not, but I am not ugly.
I just wonder that why do they hate me so much. I have never asked for love in return, but then, they don't even care about my sentiments. What is my fault? They don't even bother telling me my own mistake! I hate them; still I need someone's shoulder to rest my head on. I need someone's ears to listen to me. I want a friend.
Why am I alone? Why? What's my damned fault? According to me, I think I have never done or thought bad for anyone then why is it me, who has to listen to all this rubbish and bear all this? Everybody has questions but nobody has answers. Yeah, quiet filmy, but still, I am alone and want someone.
Whenever you are sad or low,
Just remember the memories that made you glow.
The search for yourself begins at home,
You heart is all the answers dome.
P.S.- The last two poetic quotes are from my sister's "I wasn't supposed to love" and I have used it with her permission. So kindly don't blame me for plagiarism cause it's written by my own sister.
P.P.S. - This is the first time i am writing something, so kindly review it and make my day.
Please review this and make me happy. And kindly press the "LIKE" tab.
Love,
Aashi
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