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Laagi Tujhse Lagan
Laagi Tujhse Lagan

Timelessness - OS again :D

lizdarcy Senior Member
lizdarcy
lizdarcy

Joined: 10 August 2010
Posts: 761

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:01am | IP Logged

Another *ahem* situation  I want to see on screen.

Dutta cursed himself as he got out of his jeep. It had started raining all of a sudden. It was December, for God's sake! He stifled an oath as he realized he'd stepped into a pool of slush.

For a change, he was early today. He wondered where Madhu was. Wasn't it her duty to serve him dinner these days? He frowned as he realized that Naku wouldn't come unless he called her. He walked in hoping he wouldn't bump into anyone. The one person he wanted to see refused to see him anyway. He wasn't going to seek her out again. No, he wasn't. He saw that AaiSaheb's room was locked. Strange. That was when it struck him...the marriage! AS had mentioned it to him, that they would all be going to his cousin's marriage in Solapur. He'd refused to accompany them, but AS said that everyone had to attend the wedding. So, that was why everything seemed so quiet. Had she gone too, without him? Fine. He was happy, on his own.

The house seemed eerily quiet. Nakusha was scared. AS had wanted her to come along, but she had refused saying that she wanted to stay back. AS had seen the look on her face, and agreed. She couldn't leave her saab alone, could she? He might deny it all he wanted, but she simply needed to be near him. Even if he didn't want her around. She knew he wouldn't be coming home anytime soon. It was just past eight. It would be midnight before he came in. She'd finished cleaning the room. A stroke of lightning lit the sky and she couldn't help but glance out. She walked to the window and watched the rain blur the world outside. She wondered where he was and sent up a silent prayer.

He had to be dreaming. There she was, just as he'd pictured her in all his dreams! Where she rightly belonged. Before he even realized it, he'd started walking towards her. She seemed sad, terribly sad. He knew he was the reason. The thing about this woman was, he loved her sorrows as much as he loved her childlike delight. He missed her smiles though. The way she got excited about every little thing. That, and her innocent remarks. Oh, how he'd missed her!

Naku felt his presence and turned around to find him standing behind her, just inches away. She could feel his breath on her face, and she shivered. It wasn't the cold. She looked into his eyes, and his gaze pierced her soul. She wanted to look away, but couldn't. He didn't know how long he stood there, staring at her. It was only when she said, "Saab, you're drenched!" that he came back to his senses.

He undid the buttons on his kurta, and she looked away. He couldn't. She picked up his clothes as he walked into the bath. He hurried out, hoping she was still there. She was just leaving the room when he called her. Naku, I cannot find the towel. He was in his pyjamas, his hair still wet. She handed him the towel and waited. He knew she would leave now. He stole another look at her, and made her wait.

She was about to leave the room when he said, "Stay. For today."

She looked at him, amazed.

"It's just that you're alone out there. And the house is empty. It would be safer if you sleep here for today."

He didn't quite look at her when he said it.

She was going to refuse, but then he looked at her with an angry glint in his eye.

He knew it was a bad decision. He knew he was going to have a sleepless night. It was going to be doubly torturous today. The night was going to be sleepless, and restless. He was acutely aware of her, on the other end of the bed. He turned around and in the dim light, made out her pretty features. He sighed as he forgot his restlessness and his anger. Watching her sleep was the most beautiful experience he'd ever had. And so, Dutta Shriram Patil lost all sense of time as he watched his wife sleep. Before he knew, it was dawn.

I'm such a tease. LOL

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Crystal29 Goldie
Crystal29
Crystal29

Joined: 03 February 2006
Posts: 1511

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:08am | IP Logged
Clap

Liz, You are spoiling us... Now I want these scenes you write on screen! It would be beautiful...You are so talented at these romantic scenes where the heart and eyes talk.  Kudos to you! And please keep writing!

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Yuvika_15 Viewbie
Yuvika_15
Yuvika_15

Crazy Creatives Lead
Joined: 25 July 2005
Posts: 29420

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:12am | IP Logged
Awesome Liz...i hpe tht does happen... write some more please ur reali good

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bfunofbb123

Ruya Senior Member
Ruya
Ruya

Joined: 15 September 2010
Posts: 842

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:22am | IP Logged
Hi Liz just wanted 2 say girlu r an amaaaaazing writer and ur right u r such a tease u really shud b a cv 4 our fave show Tongue

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bfunofbb123

shally_m Goldie
shally_m
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Joined: 28 February 2006
Posts: 1775

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:25am | IP Logged

liz that's not enough .... update soon

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bfunofbb123

prettywoman Goldie
prettywoman
prettywoman

Joined: 01 March 2005
Posts: 2477

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:26am | IP Logged

OMG.. u r indeed a tease, I tell ya..

But do you know what I preferred it this way as this is what Dutta in LTL would have done too. wish you would write longer parts. Gadha was able to look at her peacefully while she slept, huh.. no interruptions, no tension ki koi dekh lega!

 

He knows she is sad and that he is the cause. I just so wish he did something about it. I am getting so impatient waiting for D to get her back now. I was to see every emotion he goes thru.. like finally agreeing to himself that he loves her, cannot breather without her, is always trying to catch a glimpse of her, is missing her smiles and her baatein 9rememebr how he says in the kitchen, ki Itni chup kyun hain).. I loved him asking her that as nakku is a chatter box and now seems like a shadow of her old self.. and he realises that too..

 

I want him to have sleepless nights wondering how to woo her, please her, make her smile..kaash who din kab aayega?!

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prettywoman Goldie
prettywoman
prettywoman

Joined: 01 March 2005
Posts: 2477

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:28am | IP Logged
please continue esp as the rest of PN residents are away.. pls do

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bfunofbb123

meghaparti IF-Sizzlerz
meghaparti
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Joined: 03 August 2005
Posts: 20978

Posted: 23 December 2010 at 7:38am | IP Logged
Yet another fantastic OS Liz......Big smile

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bfunofbb123

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