ShaNak in Dhulwadi FF Part 14 Page 6 - Page 3

Posted: 13 years ago
OYE CHORIIIII...kidhar gayi tu????
Posted: 13 years ago
Good job Aditee! I really like this whole story...

keep up the good work! :P
Posted: 13 years ago
u r first person to start an FF frm part 3!!.....ady!!!....
gr8 work yaar....im planning to ask the cvs to show shanak in dhulwadi for a few weeks!!....we luv it....dnt we?
Posted: 13 years ago
I swear aditee I hope the Cvs read this ff
Posted: 13 years ago
ARE YOU planning to post more PARTS ...

THANK YOU very much for the same/....

😉
Posted: 13 years ago
I will update it with the parts Ive written thus far
 
Ruk ja
Posted: 13 years ago

Part  12

S: Thnk you, chutkula tha? (miffed)

Silence………. His eyes beging to shut again, but the grip on her hand does not ease

K: Shanatanu, ghar par koi nahi hai? (softly)

S: Who table ke side mein bell hoga bajao (weak)

K locates and presses it……… no one shows up

She watches him fall asleep,  a wave of grief suddenly hits her. Shantanu's life NOW is no different from the way he grew up. There was no one to care for him then, none now. She hated herself immensely when that thot struck her. Tears flowed down her cheeks. She leaned back on the bed and just stared at him, wondered why Mummyji or aada haven't flown in yet. He was basically sick for three days now and she, his wife was unaware and didn't bother to check on him.

She slowly eases his grip and pulls her hand out, feels his hand, its burning hot, goes thru the bedside table, she has no clue which one he is going to need to bring the fever down.

He was wearing a white shirt with the black track pants………… she could see him feel the chills, she got up purposefully and pulled the blanket over. Some things, fall off the bed. She picks up everything, crying softly, hating herself…………… "who tab bhi akele the, aaj bhi akele hain, unke saath koi nahi hai, unko naukaron ne paala, aaj jab main hoon unke jeevan mein phir bhi who unhi naukaron ke sahaare hain"

There is a gentle knock on the door. Wipes her eyes, composes herself, opens it, Chirag wants to know if she was looking for him. She directs all her annoyance at him

K:Aap kahan the? Yahan hona chahiye aapko to

C:Who madam….. who main courier company mein gaya tha

K:Kahan?

C: Who sir ka koi samaan tha jo nahi pahuncha

K: kya samaan?

C:Who koi davai si hai

A big ball of fear churns K's stomach…….. she wonders whats wrong with hubby

K:Thanda paani chahiye, maathe par patti karne ke liye

C:Abhi laaya, aap rukiye

K:Nahi chalo main bhi chalti hoon

They walk towards the kitchen, she asks him about the doctors visits, wants to know where the family is, he says Dad is in Germany, Mom has gone off to Seychelles for a yoga convention (he tries to say Seychelles), Boo and Akki will travel next week as she has a doc appoint ment this week

Doesn't make K feel any better………….. "Unko abhi bhi kaafi bukhaar hai"

C: Jee Madam  , mujhe bataya hai doctor ne kaun si dawai deni hai

K: Mujhe batao, main Gujarati mein likh loon?

They enter the most spacious, modern, well equipped kitchen she has ever seen, everything is in its place, no signs of any food been cooked

K:Kuch khaate nahi kya Shantanu?

C:Jee who teen din se sirf paani pee rahey hain, juice bhi bahut kam

Tears well up in her eyes again………….. swallows hard………. "sirf paani"

C:Usi liye Akshay bhayya ne doctor se poochkar kuch mangwaya, who abhi pahuncha nahi, sir computer nahi khol rahe to pata nahi ki packet aaya ya nahi

She wonders what it could be….. she knows fully well Dhulwadi has very poor medical help of any sort, the nearest big town was Bhuj

He fills out a glass bowl with icy water, gets out some fresh white soft hand towels, places it on a tray, hands it to her hesitantly

C:Aapke liye chai?

K: Nahi…. (firmly)

They walk back to the room to begin what would be a three day ordeal of trying to get the fever down, getting him to drink fluids, eat what ever little he could……

The doctor visits twice from Ahmedabad, Sunil considers flying the family specialist in, but the fever finally subsides on day 5.

She in the meanwhile when he is asleep, makes quick trips back home to grab a pair or two of clothes for herself and other things she might need……….. her Bai is very happy, she signals her Aada he is happy also but they both pretend like they don't care what she does.

The doc stays a nite to monitor him and gives him a shot in the evening. Chirag and Biren are very happy to have someone at home talk with them in Gujarati.

She gives herself a tour of the house when he is asleep, sits by him in bed and just looks at him…….. wonders how she could have stayed away fro so long…………

She loved him immensely. She didn't agree with much of what he did, but was strongly attracted to him.

She pulled the curtains to the side letting the sun come in……… a wide wrap around porch surrounded the house……… plants placed every few feet……… she befriended a family of butterflies and went up to the French windows every day to observe them……

He spoke little, just tossed and turned and sat up when she had to give him medications.

She heard him say her name a few times during those three days………. Heart skipped a beat each time she was reminded of what she had said to him once "Aap Khanak Khanak pukaarte ho to achha lagta hai"………….. she found herself whispering his name in return……….. each time "Shantanu"

********************************************

She must have dozed off  when she went to sit beside him on the 4th morning at 10 ish…….for when she woke she found hubby staring into her eyes intently. She lay on her back a Gujarati  newspaper on her chest all tangled, her mangal sootra pendant sideways nad inverted lay

He lay on his side, head resting on hand, elbow anchored on pillow facing her……….

She could smell a combination of aftershave, toothpaste and and soap all together……….

K:Aap??! (sleep drugged)

S: Haan main! Khanak! (amused) Subah ke 11 baj rahe hain aur tum so rahi ho?

She turned around to look for familiar things, she had no idea where she was……….. the room the curtains the bed, all looked strange………… eyes reconnected with Shaan and there was a sense of comfort…….. "there was one thing she recognized"

Gets up frantically to look for something……

S: yeh kya padh rahi thi tum(grabs the crumpled newspaper and looks at it)

K: who Chiragi ki hai. Arrey yeh to kharab ho gayi

He looks bored, throws it away

 kya hua"? (leaning forward intentionally)

K:Who mere haath mein……….. she looks under her pillow,

hovers near his body, he reaches across her body (for a brief second he feels his arm and part of his body go over hers)

and picks up the little gold Ganpati from the table "Yeh"?

K: (glorious smile) HAAN. Aapko kahan mili (grabs it with both hands, cupping it tight, he gently pries them open and puts it back on the table)

S:Tumhaare haath se gir gayi jab tum so rahi thi

K:Oh! Main to yahi lete hue padh rahi thi

S:Liar………. Jhooti (husky,tucking her hair behind her ear)

(straightens her inverted pendant on the neck arranges and rearranges it in the center, letting his fingers trail purposefully on the beads

K:Aapko kya pata? (cross) Main teen din se yahan hoon! (the touch sending a slow but steady color across her face)

S (serious) looks at her deeply "Kyon?"

K (Oh! That's tough to answer) Ummm………. Ummm…. Who…

S smiles.

K: Aapse milney do baar aaye doctor aapko kuch bhi yaad nahi? (safe to change the topic)

He smiles again!

S: Mujhe kuch yaad hai (looking into her eyes deeply)

(Index finger traces the trim on her kurta around the neck)

She reaches out and feels his forehead and cheek, he grabs her wrist "Aapko to bukhaar ab bilkul nahi hai"

He rubs her open palm on his cheek back and forth, she can feel the faint rasp ………in the backward movement of her hand………..

S:Tum to so rahi thi……. Tumhe meri fikar kahan hai Khanak? (playful fingers linking with hers, rubbing his jaw on the back of her hand)

K:Shantanu, main bus abhi leti ………….

S: Tumhe mera khayal rakhan chahiye aur madam khud so gayi, bad Khanak, very bad…. (smells her bangles)

K: Par main to yaha teen din se hoon (earnest)

S: kahan soi teen din se? (Oh good! Phew!) Buries his head in her neck……..

K: who main so yi kahan 3 raat se? Bus aapki seva mein lagi thi. (let it never be said she is tongue tied)

S laughs out loud……… raises his head, looks at her in disbelief

S:so is liye aaj subah so gayi? (disbelief)

Feels his weight slowly descending on her………

Buries his head in her neck…………. "3 hafte Khanak" he murmurs……. "I missed you" he says……. She hears him swear but doesn't know what it means………

K: Mujhe aapse baat nahi karni! Ek to mujhe itna bura laga ki koi nahi hai aur maine bhi (idiot!)

S Tumne bhi? (interesting) (in her ear)

K: kuch nahi (squirms)

S: bolo na, please (strumming on her glass bangles)

K NAHI!

S: tumhe meri fikar ho rahi thi? Tum reh nahi payi mere bina. Tumhe meri yaad aayi, Tum ache patni ki tarah meri seva karne chali aayi. Tumhari Bai ne sikhaya hoga (laughing silently)

K: Jee nahi! Who to main bus…… koi bhi beemar hota hai to uski madad….. (stops)

S: KHANAK? Koi bhi beemar hota hai Dhulwadi mein to tum uske saath aise? (raises his head, winks and openly laughs)

K:Shantanu!!!!

K: Ummm…. Maine who aapka saara samaan waha us table par rakh diya

S looks at where her fingers are pointing

 S:Ultrasound ke pics dikhaoon? (kissing her jaw)

K: KYA?

S: Khushboo bhabhi ke…… ultra--- shuts his eyes (realizing she has no clue)

K:Who kya sound?

S: Khanak (gently) who Akshay bhayya ne 20 weeks waala images bheja hai

She is super confused……..

K: Kyon?

S: Kyon ka kya matlab hai yaar. It's a baby!

K:Bhabhi ke bacha? (Light bulb!) (she is overjoyed)

Glorious smile!

He stares at it………. While she worries…..

S:haan who log parson aa rahey hain, preoccupied with counting her bangles, while she struggles to free her hand……….. she tips his elbow, he falls backwards dragging her with him……..

S has other things on his mind  obviously

K:Aap kya bata rahey the Shantanu

S:Kuch bhi to nahi (letting go of her hand to pull her face closer with her pendant)

K:Shantanu!!!

S:Khanak!!! (grins)

S:Khanak I even shaved………. (lifts his head to rub his jaw on hers)

she understands the meaning! Based on the action ofcourse ;- )

K: Nahi!

S: the baby is due in May…… who mujhse naam suggest karne ko keh rahi thi……...

His grip on her has tightened, fingers playing truant……..

K:Shantanu!!!

S: Koi aur naam soch khanak, yeh to mera naam hai………….. (quickly hoists her from side to side and places her down and his head come s down  )

 

PART 13

Khanak hummed to herself as she set the lunch tray. She glanced surreptiously to note if the two guys in the kitchen were looking at her strangely. She smiled to herself. It was past 3 PM………. She would be half way through her kadhaai class by this time she thought…………. But no……… here she was………..

A rush of guilty color spread over her face………… in bed with Shanatanu all morning…………. Reminded her of her life in Mumbai………… never in her dreams she had imagined she would ever live in Mumbai, be married to a man like him. Passionate, argumenatative, loving, possessive, hurtful at times, unfocussed………….. yet so loving

 

The food was ready to go, she took it back to their room………. HIS room she corrected herself. The laundry must have dried on the terrace, she wanted to go get them before it rained again. She wanted to call Bai and let her know when she would be returning.

At that thought………. She stops outside the room…………….. he is well now, so?

Where do they go from here?

 

She had no desire to be in the house when his family arrived

She wanted to see a pregnant Khushboo bhabhi though……. She wondered what the abby will look like

 

Shaan "Permission granted" (grins) Oh! Mera matlab……… tum anadar aa sakti ho!

Miffed "Main kuch soch rahi thi" starts walking, avoiding his eyes carefully

Shaan "Who to dikha mujhe, lekin KYA?" (tries to meet her eyes, notes her change of clothes……. Smiles to himself………. She had worn his tee for a while………. When taking her second nap of the day ;- ) jade green…….. hmm"…….. he thought  "Focus dude!" he told himself……….. "She wouldn't be too happy if he wanted to make out again……

He sat on the bed, leaning on the carved headboard, he wore the tee she had taken off with his black track pants.

His laptop, on his lap! ;- )

Some papers and books strewn all over

 

Shaan "Idhar do khaana" "Kya laayi"

Khanak" NAHI! Aap yahan table par aayiye" (firm)

Shaan smiled thinking "Gosh! This woman doesn't fear me or any body!"

K: Aap muskurayenge to main khaana bistar par nahi milega. Bai kehti hai bistar par khaana khaane……

Cuts her off

S: Tumhaari Bai har cheez mein kuch kehti hai?

K: Aapki Ba…. Mera matlab Mummyji kuch kehti kahan hai? (annoyed) unke paas time hi nahi hai (defensive)

Shaan is sad for a second

K: Shantanu mera who matlab nahi tha

S: lets not talk abt it……. (raising his hand in a stop motion)

K is suddenly feeling bad for hurting him inadvertently………..

He gets off the bed joins her on the couch…….. she serves his roti and dal and subzi ALL BLAND

He watches her serve……….. effortless, quiet, professional, as if she did this from the days he was born

She hands it to him

S:Tum?

K: mujhe bhook nahi hai (quiet)

S: No! don't tell me upv……. Whats that again……… who fast, hai kya? (ridicule)

K: Nahi! Main aapke liye kyon karoongi upvaas? (blushing)

S: nahi? (softly)

K not looking at him, leaning over the food on the table

S: chalo ab kisi aur ko dhoondta hoon jo mere liye upv……… fast karegi (cheerful)

K: DHULWADI MEIN? (are u serious?)

Their eyes meet finally…….. he holds her gaze…………….. she has to look away as usual as his wants to linger

He smiles……….. "nahi Bombay mein" (mocks)

K: (shocked) aap laut rahey hain? (looks at his laptop as if a signal came from it)

S: haan bus……… tum mere liye fast nahi karogi………..to

K suddenly realizes it's a prank, decides to give it back……..

Smiles "Shantanu, aap khaana kha lijiye main aapka samaan laga doon?"

Eyes meet………. "I am not going back with out YOU"

Her heart skips a beat

"I know that but I wont let you even think of any one else"

S's gaze pause over her lips "THAT I know as well"

Silence!

K: kh khaana? (softly)

S: hmmm (still looking at her)

He eats, she serves for herself, he watches where she goes, she sits by him, but not close…….. her dupatta, drapes over his knee as she sits…………. She is unmindful of it……… they both eat in silence for a minute or two

S: is khaane mein to kuch bhi nahi hai

K: Aap jaldi se ache ho jaayiye phir aap jo kahenge main bana doongi (bites her tongue and then her lower lip)

S: To tum chal rahi ho Mumbai? (smug)

K: Who……….. mujhe………. Mujhe aapse yeh kehna tha……….. ki mujhe ……………. Main…………….. Bai ka phone aaya tha, mujhe aaj sham ko ghar ………….. (faint)

He stops eating sets the plate back on the coffee table

K: Aap khaana to khaiye na

S: Nahi mujhe bhook nahi hai

Takes a paper towel, wipes his hand and throws it in disgust on the plate

Gets up……….. walks over to the window in frustration

S (turns around almost yelling) Tum YAHAN rehkar kya prove karna chahti ho?

S: DHULWADI MEIN? (corrects himself just so that she doesn't start off another one of her word plays thinking he meant the haveli)

K is upset too, she stands up, paces the room, walks over to the four poster bed, and holds on to one……. Kneads it with her hand………. nervously

K: Mujhe apne ghar ke kuch kaam

S interrupts angrily " TUM? Kadhaai ke kaam se? Are you joking Khanak?" walks up to her "You are kidding"

K is confused

S: Tumhara dimaag to sahi hai? Kadhaai karke tum kab XX lakh chukaogi? Ya zindagi bhar yahi rehne ka iraada hai *(If you so much even think that way, I am goingt o murder you)

K: Aap ko to koi aur Mumbai mein………… vrat……….

S: Its not funny Khanak…. Main mazaak ke mood mein nahi hoon Khanak

Silence

He doesn't touch her but she feels his breath……….

She steps back and her back hits the foot rest, she leans………. And breathes out

S: Main yahan 3 HAFTE SE tumhaare liye ruka hua hoon, aur tum bina sochey samjhe, apne Bai ke ghar ja rahi ho?

K: ,Main kya karoon? Mujhe unko sambhalna hai, unki taraf mere jo kartavya hain?

S: What bloody KARTAVYA Khanak? AUR MERI TARAF? Meri taraf kya hai?

She looks down at her feet

S: Bus yahan ek mahiney mein ek baar……….. he points to the bed (husky) NO! Ab tum jaogi to pata nahi kab aaogi. Na phone karti ho, na milney aati ho………….. hum shaadi shuda hain, tumhe yaad hai na? (taunt)

Embarrassing color floods her face

There is no winning with him she thinks

She wants to give everything up and go!

But her mind loves her too much to allow it

S: khanak?

K: Hmmm (soft barely audible)

S: Main tumhare bina nahi reh sakta. KYON RAHOON MAIN? (firm)

She feels the physical and emotional demands of the relationship slowly over powering her

K:Shantanu………. Main yaha ek kaam se aayi hoon mera yahan se usey poora karey bagair jaana sahi nahi hoga. Main Bai aur Aada se kya kahoongi?

S: KYA? Are u serious? Tumhaare Bai aur Aada tumhe mere saath Mumbai laut te dekh dukhi hongey?

K: Ummm mera who matlab nahi tha………

S: Kya matlab tha?

K: Main koshish kar rahi hoon na, kisi grameen vyavastha se karz ka intezaam karne ke pryaas mein……….

S: WHAT? Kya keh rahi ho tum?

K: Who mere kaam ke oopar karz………..

S: XX lakh?

S: mujhe to lagta hai tum mere saath Mumbai na jaane ki poori planning kar rahi ho

K: nahi, mujhe aapke saath……… (she swallows the "rehna hai" part)

S: KYA?

K: Mujhe thoda waqt chahiye

S: Kitna? Do din? 4 din? Dadi yahan Khushboo bhabhi ke liye koi function karna chahti hain, uske baad we are outta here Khanak!

K is confused kya hua Khushboo bhabhi ko?

S tone softens………. "unko kuch nahi hua, unke liye ghar par koi pooja"

K's eyes light up and go out all in a split second, she wants to attend and yet knows she may not be invited………

S: (softly) Agle Tuesday……… mera matlab, (counts on his fingers as if reciting at school) "Mangal??"

"Kya pehnogi?" "Traditional Gujarati?" "Ya saree?" (husky)

K smiles nervously, looking at his feet………. Well groomed she thinks

S: (pleads)don't go………… (reaches for a lock of hair on her cheek) "main tumhe saree pehan ne mein help kar sakta hoon" (winks when she looks up in shock)

K: AAAP?

S: kyon (creeps closer)

K: Kuch nahi (glorious smile)

S: Waise utaarna mera favorite activity mera matlab kaam hai (cheesy)

K: Who mujhe maloom hai (smug)

S: Good!

Silence

(Both their mind doing a you tube replay of their favorite saree clad scenes)

K:  Aap ko kitna gussa aata hai……….. baap rey (breaks the silence)

S: (smiles) tum ruk jaogi to bilkul nahi daatoonga (husky)

K:Aap pehle bataiye aap kya khaayenge? Who……..sss sand wech"?

S smiles………. "sure" "Tum rukogi to" (they both play very carefully………… the game of chess/life)

K: Who kya hai na, Bai……….

S's face tightens………….. lets go of her the lock of hair

She quietly but firmly turns away walks over collects the stuff from the table and walks out

He is leaning on the foot rest and watches her walk away

****************************

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted: 13 years ago

Super Awesome..

Even if they incorporate half of this into the show...It will totally ROCK !!

They can actually lift off your total FF........It starts with a fight and her coming to Dhulwadi....they can copy the full thing word to word and credit you for the story...Hehehe

Posted: 13 years ago
@aditee..nice 1 yaar...thanks 4 the update...
Posted: 13 years ago
Suprr Like!!AWESUM...caps mein 4 u...b/w whrz d 14th part!....

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