Rang Badalti Odhani


Rang Badalti Odhani
Rang Badalti Odhani

FF: Kismat ki Kagaz par..- Last Part , pg 107 (Page 4)

-shamima- IF-Dazzler

Joined: 20 August 2010
Posts: 2883

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 4:32am | IP Logged
aww sweet update loved the original ideas that you have its a sweet love story and just cant wait to see how khanak tries manofie shaan now and then let the romance begin lool anywyas update soon Smile

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destinylove IF-Rockerz

Joined: 09 August 2010
Posts: 7616

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 6:58am | IP Logged
dear smpar!!!
aweosme updtes both were sweet and simple .loved it.. do continue as and when u can..

Edited by sshriyaa84 - 21 October 2010 at 6:58am

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sampar Senior Member

Joined: 04 August 2005
Posts: 426

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 3:16pm | IP Logged
Thanks shanakforever, ZaraK18,  FebruaryFlower, shamima, and sshriyaa84.....Smile

Part 6:

New Day and a new Khanak :

A smiling khanak was humming a song while working in the kitchen. She was making shantanu's favourite dish ..kheer…. app kheer ko dekh kar to mujey maaf kar hee dengaye…hmmm…kheer tu tayar abb kya …. she heard car honk… lagta hai shantanu ai gaye … kya karoon …main bahar jaioon kay na …..her heart was beating really fast …

She heard everyone talking at the dining table …ada was asking shaan about his project..... shaan excused himself from everyone as he was very tired from last two days… suddently khanak was infront of shantanu when he turned to go..he looked at her without any expression and ignored her smile and climbed the stairs … khanak saw pain in his eyes and her smiled disappeared as he passed by her … shaan slept most of the day and khanak knew he was tired she didn't disturbed him … shaan woke up around evening… and came downstairs… khanak saw him …. Khanak: shantanu ney subha sey kuch nain khaya …. Un ko khaney kay liye bolatee hoon … shantanu..heard khanak calling him …he turned  to her….khanak: wo app ney kuch khaya nahi hai ..kuch khah legiye …app table per jaioo main khana latee hoon… shantanu: nahi mujey bookh nain hai ..main baad main khah loonga … shantanu walked out  to poolside ….

Shantanu: khanak ab bhi normal behave kar rahii hai…usey kuch farak nain parta main kahan tha do din ..us ney mujsey poucha nain kay main kahan tha ..Usey to koi farak nain parta mere honey na honey sey …main hee pagal tha uss kay pechay …lakin ais dil ka kya karoon…he puts his hand on his heart and heavly signs ….

Khanak (at the poolside with a bowl of kheer): shantanu …shantanu ..

Shantanu: hmm (came out of his thoughts) ..hmm kya howa.. and saw kheer in her hand…

Khanak: app ney kuch nain khaya..acha yeh kheer hee kha legiyee…shantanu saw concern in her eyes…nain mujey nahi kheer khaniii…tum jaioo yahan sey main akelay rehna chata hoo kuch waqt…and tuned to other side …while turning his elbow hits the  bowl…and hot kheer fell on khanak's hand and feet…ahhhhhh…khanak cried out in pain … shantanu quickely turned …. (hahaha I know guys kheer is suppose to be tandi but anyways)..

Shantanu : omg … khanak tum theek hoo…I m so sorry… tum theek tho hoo… buhat dard ho raha ha..oh god yeh jal gaye ab kya karoon ….he quickely drags khanak near the pool and splashes water on her hand and feet ..in the process khanak was all wet… chaloo khanak room main ja kay ointment laga deeta hoon …. Chalooo…

In room… khanak haath agey karoo…shantanu held her hand and applied ointment on her burn and blows air on her hand… khanak felt his warm breath and  some sensation passed through her body..she grabbed onto the bed sheet with her other hand….shantanu noticed her action and smiled slightly...khanak was staring at shantanu and felt her pain going away … ahhhh…shantanu: kya howa khanak …she bends down to look at her feet …shantanu : oh sorry tumharay pear ka main bhool gaya .. lao upper karoo… khanak was hesitating …khanak pear upper karoo….he applied ointment on her feet also....he got up to go but bends closer to her face wipes her tear and wishper in her ear..aglee bar kheer tandi lana ..agar algee bar kuch our jal gaye too..Winked at her ..our han I m sorry … he laughed out loud and turned …khanak was amazed at his laughter … han han theek hai...wasey mujey chot lagi hai ..ketni jalan ho rahee hhai app kee waja sey our app hass rahey hoo burthal…app buhat buree hoo….(in her mind) app ke ik  hasii kay liye kuch bhi shantanu …app ke hasii dekh kar yeh dard ab mehsoos nain hota … our main wada kartii hoon kay app ko kabhi dukhii nain honey doon gee .. abb to jeena app ke liye our merna bhi app kay liye …

Shantanu left and was standing by the balcony … thinking … khanak shayad tum mujsey door jana chatee hoo.. agar aisa hai to theek hai …mere waja sey tum ney buhat kuch saha hai abb our nahii..agar tum mujsey door hokar khush hoo to theek hai… lakin main tumey dard main nain dekh sakta . lakin ais dil ka kya karoon jo abb sirf tumharey liye dharaktha hai. Meri sansoo main sirf tum hoo sirf tum …main ney buhat koshish ki yeh janey ke kay shayad tum bhi mere liye kuch feel kartee..lakin main haar gaya khanak main haar gaya … a tear droped from his eye …

Next morning khanak was standing in front of dressing table ….she was trying very hard to tie the dhori at the back ..but her hand was in pain ..she was having hard time with the dhori..shantanu in trouser..water dripping from his hair… came out from washroom and saw her struggling with the dhori..he put the towel on the bed and moved closer to her and moved her hand from her back …startled khanak saw him in the mirror..he signal kay main kar detha hoon …. Slowly he put his hand on the dhori and tied it together..khanak felt his skin against her skin and her heart skipped a beat …shantanu was losing to khanak …water  from his hairs drops on her shoulder ….shantanu saw water droplet on her shoulder…slowly bends down and wiped the water with his lips….khanak gasped loudly with her eyes closed …shantanu removed her hairs from the side and plants a kiss on her neck….his hands sliding down on her arms … shantanu's hand reached her hand …ahhhh…she screamed and both came out of the world ….shantanu saw her burned  hand in his hand and quickly let it go…and moves his hand though his hair … oh shit yeh main …I m sorry khanak … and again enters washroom … khanak felt good by his touch but  his sorry made her sad…she knew shantanu was feeling guilty soo she quietly left the room…

When shantanu goes down … gets to know that they are invited to a business party..he wasn't in the mood of party but sunil tell him that its important party soo we all have to goo… shaan agreed … later that day shantanu called home from office  to talk to khanak.

Khanak: jee boliye …

Shantanu: han wo khanak main batana tha kay ajj sham ko hamey aik party per jana hai …tu tum tayar rehna main tumey pick karloo ga sham ko 7 bajey ….

Khanak: party ..lakin main party main kasey ….wo main…

Shantanu: (cuts her)…main janata hoon tum aisee party main pehlee baar ja rahii hoo..lakin yeh aik important party hai …..our wasey bhi main hoon na tumharey saath …khanak smiled

Around six in the evening … khanak was getting nervous and in her nervousness couldn't decide what to wear… hmmm kya pehnoo mujey tu kuch samj main nain ai raha ….hmm yeh theek hai ..laal sari…

She came out from washroom wearing laal sari… goes infront of mirror and put her jewellary…she wasn't wearing too much jewellary still she looked simple and elegant …she curled  her hair slightly … removes her hair to side and ties the dhori of her blouse… sets her palu and looks at her refelction in the mirror…lowered her eyes shyly …she looked like a newly wedded bride..beautiful and blushing … shantanu came home and went to his room to get ready … in hurry didn't notice khanak ..Grabs his clothes that were laid on the bed by khanak ..and quickly enter the washroom …shantanu comes out and says khanak tum…..he was dumbstruck when he saw khanak in sari after a long time …khanak saw him in the mirror and lowered her eyes ….she could feel his eye all over her body …he stared at her from head to toe… her slightly curled hair ..Simple but little longer earrings..his eyes moved to her neck… a simple necklace with her mangalsutar…looks at bangles matching with her sari and finally down at her sari ..  in this get up khanak was looking breathtaking to his eyes… he comes out of his world..and walks toward dressing to make his hair and to apply some perfume…khanak turned to walk away..her arm brushed against his arm…sending current to their body…. Khanak felt pull on her palu(stuck onto shantanu's watch) …which caused pin from her shoulder to come off and her paluu flys away …shantanu turns and looks at her without her paluu.. I m sorry khanak and turns aways…. Khanak was having difficult to pin her paluu again..Shantanu saw her through the mirror …khanak main help kar doo… she slightly nodes her head …shantanu moved closer to her and help her to pin her paluu ..and he wraps her paluu around her other shoulder and wishper in ear tum buhat koobsurat lagrahii hoo eis sari main…. Shantanu was wearing red shirt with black suit looking dashing and handsome as always …

At the party …khanak was getting nervous but shantanu told her to relax main hoon na… in between the party he left khanak alone khanak heard mummy ji talking to some other lady…

Mrs mehta: arey mrs khandelwal app ney apne bte ki shadi aik gaon ki larki say kar dii. Are wo larki to biilkul gawar hai ….usey to ais party main ana hee nahi chayee tha

Madhvii: I know mrs Mehta … wo kuch dinoo main mere bte ko chor de gee… arey mere beta tu Natasha sey pyaar karta hai..or  un dono kee shadi ki date bhi fix hoo gayee hai … wo khush hai ais shadi ko lay kar…buhat excited be… yeh KFD to chalee jaye gee hamesha hamesha kay liye ..

Khanak felt tear flowing from her eyes..turned around to leave but saw shantanu and natasha standing together and laughing … she felt pain in her heart ….she quickly leave and goes to garden…mummy ji bilkul theek thi .. main shantanu ka kabil nain hoon … main kyun yahan aii …agar wo mujsey pyaar karte hain to fir yeh shadi…nain mujey kio galtfehmee houii hai .. wo mujsey pyaar kyun karan gee…wo to hemesha ssey Natasha ji say pyar karty hain our shadi bhi Natasha ji sey…her voice break down…cries out loud ..kyun main un say pyar karney lagee kyun main khud ko rok nahi payee…kyun wo meri zindigi main aye jab kay wo mere thay he nain … kyun ..fell down on her knees sobbing ….suddenly she feel something flying towards her near her knee.. she pick it up and it's the 10 rupee ka note….and finds her and shantanu's name on it….out loud…main ney kismet ka kagaz samj kar yeh us bache ko diya tha….lakin mere kismet main yeh sab nahi hai … sab jhoot hai yeh sab jhoot hai ….meri kismet ki kagaz per shantanu ka naam tu kabhi tha hee nain our na khabi hoo ga…she gets up to leave still holding on to the note and ask the driver to drop her home..


hahah u guys must be thinking ..she is really fast at updating  ....well that is because i already have half of the story typed upWink.....soo enjoy and do let me know how it was and also if u get bored of reading really long partsLOL......plz ignore spelling and grammar mistakes .....

next: a big confrontation and maybe a confession Embarrassed

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shanakforever IF-Dazzler

Joined: 06 August 2010
Posts: 2910

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 3:30pm | IP Logged
ClapClapClapThumbs UpThumbs UpThumbs Up
 damn sampar wat should i say to u ur every scene makes me go numb n i crave fr more evrytime...........superb dear ur writing n imaginationsis just tooooooooooooooooooooooo good
 awesome n i love u fr updating sooooo fast
 superb scenes gosh i  eagerly wwait fr the time u update cause i know every scene is gonna b rocking
 just tooooooooooooooooooooo good awesome

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FebruaryFlower IF-Dazzler

Joined: 17 July 2010
Posts: 3121

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 3:46pm | IP Logged
Great update Shai!!
Loved the closeness between Shanak......Smile
Look forward to the next part.

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-shamima- IF-Dazzler

Joined: 20 August 2010
Posts: 2883

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 7:12pm | IP Logged
Woop Woop loved the update and atleast you incoorpratee he note in your story I hope rbo haven't forgotten about it bcaue I want a scene with the signed rupee anyways back to your ff too many misunderstandings that I feel like screaming you both love each other lool but yeh waiting for you next update as you said big confrontation so yeh update soon Big smile

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sexyheels Senior Member

Joined: 25 August 2010
Posts: 712

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 9:20pm | IP Logged
oooo i like i like all of it do write more i like quick updates i get so excited 
LOVE that you incorporated the red sari that we ALL want her to wear and knock shaan off his wits lolz more scenes like today's Big smile
i loved the dori scene very romantic Blushing

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simikr IF-Rockerz

Joined: 17 January 2007
Posts: 7754

Posted: 21 October 2010 at 9:33pm | IP Logged
Your story is certainly more intense than the serial now!LOL Yeh pal pal kareeb aana, choona almost choomna! Haiii! Imagination is running wild yaar! Please continueClap

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