Originally posted by eljay
Originally posted by Sue Nair
I just can't understand why they had to have Chitra's character so messed up like this. Is it necessary to make her go thru 2 miscarriages and then finally make her infertile? Why is it they put so much of emphasis when a girl is unable to conceive and they quickly think of finding another bride so that they can have their waris.
When a man is impotent/infertile how come they do not think of getting the girl married again so that she can experience motherhood?? Is this why they call it "the man's world?"
Sue chech, it is only now that they have accepted the idea of widows remarrying, whereas it was always considered okay for the man to remarry - kudumbam nadakka vendaamaa?
Nobody ever thought of the poor widow who was at the mercy of the inlaws or her own brother's family. It will be at least another hundred years before our Indian society will accept a woman remarrying because the husband is sterile! You and I will be long gone by then.
When I got married, one of my colleagues (poor man!) was trying to find a suitable match for his daughter who was about 27, and he approached one of my inlaws about my hubby's cousin, who was apparently a good looking guy and was at least 40 at the time. I don't know if he knew that this guy was a widower, but I still remember some of my inlaws telling me how he looked like he was only 30 and would be an excellent match, but they wanted to know what the girl looked like, was she fair, pretty, did she look young, and so on. I was so tempted to tell them that it would be her first marriage and so she should be the one to ask such questions, but I kept quiet as was proper for a new bride (and as I still do, except in places like this!) I have never seen the cousin myself, or if I did, I can't even remember what he looks like, but I was so glad that this girl got married to a young CA soon after, and it was the first marriage for him, and this guy was a nice looking guy, too! I couldn't even tell my colleague to look elsewhere, because he would have wondered why I was telling him that.
Okay, now that I have finished my lecture, I am off.[/QUOTE]
Thanks da chellam....its simply a man made law thus making it in only
in favour for them by givng excuses by saying "kudumbam nadakka vendaamaa" while the women are being deprived and surpressed. I see this not only among our Indians but in other races too making their laws favouring the men eg. even if they decide to divorce ther wives... they just have to say the "magic" word to remove her completely from his life. He can then cooly and conveniently pakaran for a new virgin bride like a new "virgin" groom himself...!!
I do not want to write further coz it might cause unpleasant disputes...coz I live in a multi-racial, multi-religious and a multi-cultural society..... Idhu kuda supressing thaan..I believe..!
Edited by Sue Nair - 27 August 2010 at 10:15am