AN: Give me some sunshine... Part 6 - pg 7 : 5/10 - Page 6

Posted: 12 years ago

~*~ Part 6 ~*~

He knew this was going to be tough but thinking about it was something and actually being in that situation facing her, seeing her accepting and yet rejecting the love, it was painful. Not just because it hurt him but because she was still hurting herself. She believed that she was happy but her eyes didn't shine. They just gave away all the pain she was trying to hide from him. They showed him how incomplete; unhappy she was, without her friends and above all without him... 

He had been observing her between checking on patients. She looked lost in thoughts. So he still mattered and yet earlier she was making unsuccessful attempt to hide it. Was she thinking about running away again? No... No... She can't run away. He won't let her. Not this time. He now knows that both of them can never be happy without each other. She isn't ready to accept it right now just like he didn't see it few months ago. He needs to step up like she did. This time he is going to make it right. He had already promised himself that while reading her diary pages. Now seeing her in front of him it looks possible, and almost at a touching distance. Seeing her gave him that extra strength. He would do anything to show her that she still loved him. He was ready; ready to show her what future would be like if they are together. He smiled, genuinely, for the first time in months.

Having finished checking up patients for the day she turned around and first thing she noticed was the smile on his face. He was happy? Was it to see her, or to see that she is still suffering? Her heart wanted to believe it was first but her head didn't let her. She was burnt enough times now she can't let that happen again. But seeing him smile somehow sent a wave on happiness through her too. And that was not in control of her head. Her head didn't understand it at all but her heart was aching to see him smile since so long. She wondered if she was still not ready to face him and be over him. She had believed otherwise until early this morning. But she had to do something fast before her heart takes over her head. She cannot love anyone now. Whenever she loved somebody, whoever she loved, she always got hurt. This time it was killing her and the pain was not going away whatever she did whatever she believed. Dying was easier compared to this pang in her heart that she felt when she saw him. She always could mend her heart somehow. Somebody had always helped her with that. When parents broke her heart it was Armaan, when Armaan broke her heart there was Abhi. But now? Was she ready to let another person come in her life, again to break her heart after mending it again? Why was her life like that? Didn't she deserve love? Was she so bad person? She never thought bad for anybody then why was this happening to her? She closed her eyes and realized how her thoughts were running wild. She had guarded them inside her for so many months. She had worked hard to feel satisfied and peaceful and believed that nobody would disturb that. But just one glimpse of him and it was all undone. How can she let that happen? What was she doing? He had hurt her, he had broken her heart in million pieces every day every moment yet it was the same heart that ached for him, wanted to be his. Was this some kind of joke?

Sighing she opened her eyes only to see him standing just few feet away looking straight in her eyes.. His eyes seem to plead her to believe in whatever he is saying... She was going to go mad if this continued and she had to stop all this. She had given enough moments to her heart to go weak, to let down her decision but it was enough now.

He saw firmness coming on her face as if she is deciding something, making the mind. She saw him turn around and he quickly said: 

Making plans to run away again?

His tone had no emotions... She couldn't make out if he was teasing her, provoking her or simply seeing through her... She wasn't sure what to say nor was sure about the answer to his question. His presence had woken up the dormant volcano of thoughts that she had never thought of waking up. But she knew she had to guard herself from him and for that whatever she had to do she would do.

No.

She replied putting up a straight face and turning around.

No?

No. Why should I? Who are you? You are nobody to me now. So really it doesn't bother.

He looked hurt by her matter of fact voice, but just for a moment. 

Really?

Yes.

Aahh.. So she is playing it this way? Trying to hurt him so he runs away instead?

No way Niki.. It took me really long time to realize what you mean to me and now nothing, nobody, not even you can hurt me or make me go away from you.

Hmm

That's all he said but when he saw her stepping away, he continued 

Don't you atleast miss your friends?

So this man was not going to give up. Here she was trying to hurt him so he leaves her alone and he was interrogating her like he found most wanted criminal. She had to show him he don't have any rights to ask her such stupid and disturbing questions.

None of your business Dr. Modi. But since you asked, answer is no. I am really happy with whatever and wherever I am. 

He walked closer to her. There was fear in her eyes and hesitation. He looked at her for a while and then moved even more close and gently picked up the lone tear that was on her chic.

It doesn't look like though. Was this tear of happiness then?

He asked looking straight in her eyes.

 

She wanted to run away but her feet were betraying her. Her head was telling her to move away and reply back but it was like she didn't know how to talk. She looked in his eyes and saw hurt, unhappiness and yet willingness to bear anything just for her sake.

You can't believe it, Niki. You don't deserve love. Whatever you are seeing in his eyes it's just illusion; illusion that you are creating to feel loved. But you can't be.

Seeing all the emotions on her face and seeing her fighting with herself, he moved away creating distance and told her

Niki, he took a small pause for a minute waited for her to come back from her thoughts and listen to what he was saying.

Niki, whatever you do, I am going to be here just right beside you. You can ignore me, hurt me how much ever you want but I will be here just like you were for me. I will wait for you to feel secure and safe and feel the love that i have to give you. I will be here. Now that I have found you I can't let you go. So you can think about anything but running away, because that's the only thing I won't let you do. Anything else I am here. Waiting forever for you.

There were tears in her eyes. Her heart believed what he said and begged her head to believe it and give up on that stupid stubbornness. But it was putting up huge fight. This conflict was unbearable and she didn't know what to do what to say or how to go from there. Abhi that she was seeing was the same Abhi she had seen before the pool incident but more open about his thoughts. And that bothered her. She didn't know how to react to this, what to make of this and what to expect. She needed to be alone very desperately, the alone time would help her calm the storm of thoughts that were going everywhere, in each direction. She longed for the bed in the tent really bad. She decided she would tell him exactly same thing minus all the confusion off course.

Abhimanyu, I really don't want to think about all this right now. I came here hoping to help these people who need the medical attention. I cannot go through this right now, why can't you live me alone.

I told you why.

Yes you did and I told you that none of this matter anymore.

He moved a bit closer and said,

Yes and I heard it. But I don't believe it Niki. I know that you don't believe it too. You are just being stubborn and angry. Niki we both made mistakes, but that didn't change anything between us. I know that you still love me.

He saw she was going to interrupt but he wasn't going to let her. He continued,

I know you don't think so and you believe that is over but I don't think so Niki and I am here. You take how much ever time you need and I would still be here waiting. Waiting for you. And till then be yourself Niki. Don't worry about anything I can't see you worrying so much. I would really be glad to see you smiling, doing all those pranks. And if possible don't give up on your friends or me. You matter Niki. A lot.

Saying this he stepped away and saw her looking puzzled confused.

Well he is not impatient anymore. Do I like it? Stop it, stop right there and go to your room and think clearly. 

She gave him one quick look and turned around and went to her tent. It was going to be a long night.

Edited by anotheranfan - 12 years ago
Posted: 12 years ago

Long part! 😃

 
Will read later!
 
RES!
Posted: 12 years ago

Hy Pri,🤗 just caught up with your  and all thanks to Khush who by chance mentioned about your ff otherwise I would have missed on this wonderful piece from you.😉

Loved all the 6 parts of your fic as you've written it beautifully clearly explaining each and everything and most of all I loved the basic storyline of your ff.👍🏼

You've actually chosen a very nice point to continue the storyline. I, personally, never liked the original track after that 8pm track, loved the way you've continued the story.

Looking forward to your next update. Do pm me and I promise a regular and individual comment on each of your updates hence forth.

Love….

Neha

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