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ArTilicious ArTi CC #19: love is forever:D (Page 4)

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parisbynight

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parisbynight

Joined: 23 October 2007

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Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:28am | IP Logged
u knw i read  evry single fff os i find on mayur!
i never missed them!!!

but u knwo,english isnt my first language so,im finding it hard to form grammatically correct narration..i struglle with narration at past tense ,and sometime i feel my sentences make no sense ..


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parisbynight

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parisbynight

Joined: 23 October 2007

Posts: 2609

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:29am | IP Logged
btw have u read the arti shot i wrote..

shinz

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shinz

Joined: 03 September 2009

Posts: 8752

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:30am | IP Logged
i can understand that....even english is not my first language.....sometimes even i get stuck at places with some complex sentences and grammatical errors...but then i think we will grow only with writing more....so im learning i guess!

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parisbynight

shinz

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shinz

Joined: 03 September 2009

Posts: 8752

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:31am | IP Logged
u wrote it beautifully paris..i did read it and i have to comment on it! LOL...i read it on my cell so didnt comment that time!!! will do so in the night!!

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parisbynight

parisbynight

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parisbynight

Joined: 23 October 2007

Posts: 2609

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:35am | IP Logged
and for "at last" i feel like im loosing track of the story lol...but once im over wihtt his exam if will retrack it better..i ve been dragging 2 days of the story for the last 6/7 chapters..lol

upcomig i will show tht mayur r not scared to show their feelings anymore

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shinz

shinz

IF-Rockerz

shinz

Joined: 03 September 2009

Posts: 8752

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:38am | IP Logged
i guess its time!
i knoe we havent talked before but there are many things that i see in ur story
i guess its time they got together for real...u see....they have had enough suffering, longing, confusion....let them fall in love again......they are in love i knoe...but for each other they need to fall in love!!

how abt send mayank away for 3 days for some work and ont he phone u let them talk abt how they are missing each other...and it will be a nice surprise for both of them to actually say i miss u a lot to the other one
they need to build up this now

this is my POV....ur the boss LOL

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parisbynight

parisbynight

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parisbynight

Joined: 23 October 2007

Posts: 2609

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:41am | IP Logged
ok shld i discuss with u what i have in mind ...
i think i need adivce from a reader,after i write for readers so it is gud to have their feeback..(yes im not like cv!!)

but this stays btw us..ok?

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shinz

shinz

IF-Rockerz

shinz

Joined: 03 September 2009

Posts: 8752

Posted: 08 June 2010 at 6:42am | IP Logged
definitely...no problems...i have been following ur story since day 1.....i'd be more than happy to have a say LOL

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