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NEW FANFIC-Obsession Updated Ch8 pg 14 (Page 7)

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shahbara

Senior Member

shahbara

Joined: 17 October 2009

Posts: 561

Posted: 26 June 2010 at 2:29am | IP Logged

Mindblowing storyClap   you are an amazing writer! coz i'm sitting glued to my seat while reading your novel and waiting impatiently for the next chapters , no doubt krishna's character is different in your novel and i'm curious to see to what extent he can go... but it's too early to judge him. I am also heart-broken for pratigya, she's too weak , she should fight back. Waiting eagerly for the nxt chapter. shefads.  

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aleena1

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shruthiR

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shruthiR

Joined: 27 January 2010

Posts: 9125

Posted: 26 June 2010 at 2:38am | IP Logged
Originally posted by arhaanfanatic

Originally posted by UnIqUe954

Originally posted by aleena1

Originally posted by arhaanfanatic

Kyaaaa  beh, u totalyy spoilt krisna character turned him into sycho
 
dis Fanfic is totally BAKWAS
im sur evrybody will agree wiv me
 
totalyy crap!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 
Agar aap ne fanfic likna hai to storyline thoda sa change karo, aur humra krishna ko achese dilogues dedo aur maar/pitna band karlo. yeh kya sik rahi ho logo ko?
 
waisa bhi aapne pratigya ka role  milta hai Pratigya serial me. woh to bohut kamzoor lachaar aurat  hai, aur ek hi shakal banathe jo aapne kaha SHOCkED face.
.
 
 
 
 
Oh my god, is my fanfic that terrible? I know it's not in the same league as the rest, but still I was doing the best I can.
 
If there are more people who share the same views as you, I will stop writing this fanfic


im nottt evn lying n i dunt wannaaa lyke be mean or anythinggg butt thss ff is rlllyyy softtttOuchOuch..loll...seriouslyy i dunttt thinkkk tht thiss ff iss rllyyy thtt guddd....no offense....i have no intention to be mean or cruell orr hurt urr feelings  buttt i actuallyy agreee with arhaann fanaticc....imeannn evrythinggg in this ff is perrfeectttt buttt krishna's character justtt ruinnnsss evrythinngg andd makess itt completelyy imperfectt......buttt in the endd itss upp too...there are pplz whoo likee thisss ff but i m  certainly not oneee of themConfused
.
 
 
 
 
Aleena1: I told you so..yeh fanfic bohut bakwas hai......stop writing and spoiling Krishu's character........
 
See Anover person agrees wiv me....
crap ff
Excuse me,there is a way of writing down your critisicm.You have no right to go around calling other ppl's hard work as bakwaas or crap.If you can't bear to read Krishna behaving like this then don't read her ff.It's as simple as tht.Aleena is trying her best to entertain us with her ff and it's very unique and different from the other ffs on this forum.You can critisize but harsh critisicm will not be tolerated by the other readers of this ff.
 
@Aleena: a majority of us really like your ff a lot.Pls continue with it and don't let such harsh comments get you down.Those who are criticising your ff don't even know how to write down their thoughts and to present it in a proper manner.And your ff is darn good and it's not just me,there are many others who feel the same way abt your hard work.If you don't believe me then pls just go through your thread to know how many positive comments and good feedback tht you've got.Pls continue with this ff and your doing a great job hunThumbs UpKeep up the good workSmile


Edited by shruthiR - 26 June 2010 at 6:44am

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GMMAPristineSoulaleena1..CountingStars

halaa

Senior Member

halaa

Joined: 26 July 2009

Posts: 570

Posted: 26 June 2010 at 6:26am | IP Logged
that  was very interesting update.oh my GOD why is Krishna doing this to pratigya. i hope pratigya is alright and komal will saver her from Krishna.thank u for writing such an interesting update and for ur pm.. can't wait to read what will happen next.plz continue soon.

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aleena1

aleena1

IF-Rockerz

aleena1

Joined: 31 August 2005

Posts: 9286

Posted: 26 June 2010 at 6:22pm | IP Logged
Hiya sorry for the short update...was too tired to write.
 
Happy readingSmile
 

CHAPTER 5

 

 

Kamal shouts: DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH MY PRATIGYA''..

Pratigya:  Kamal'.I'.

Krishna stops and stares at them both wideeyed and says 'my Pratigya????'

 

 

Upon hearing all the commotion, Adarsh and Chandu rush into the room. They are shocked to see them in this state

 

Adarsh: What happened? Kamal' Why are you on the floor?? What's going on here?

 

Kamal who is fuming says 'Krishna''why did you hit Pratigya?'

Chandu:  Wait''What's going on here? What's the problem?......Krishna did you hit Prat?

Krishna: I didn't hit her, we were just playing around a little and she fell''

Kamal: You bloody liar''you stand there and lie through your teeth''you scoundrel'..Kamal looks at Pratigya, but pratigya is visibly shaken and sees Krishna giving evil glances''.

Pratigya: erm Kamal, It's just as Krishna says'. It's nothing' we were just mucking about and I fell.

Kamal: Nothing''what do you mean nothing? Look whats he done to you'

Pratigya: I'm sorry Kamal that you're in this state and I worried you, it's not a big deal.

Kamal frustrated and says 'Why the hell are you apologizing? It's him who should apologize and not you. Besides no matter how you look at this situation, he is using violence'.

Krishna interrupts:  It's only misunderstanding; we were just talking and mucking about when she lost her footing and fell'..

Doctor Armaan enters the room and is shocked to see Kamal on the floor.  'What are you doing on the floor? Adarsh puts his arms around Kamals waist and picks her up.

Kamal: erm Hey doc, nothings going on here, we were just chatting and I tripped up and hence all this commotion started'''

Doctor Armaan: you should be more careful, you havent recovered yet' you need to rest. Adarsh, could you take her to the ward?

Adarsh: yep I will.

Kamal glances over her shoulder and looks at Pratigya. She thinks why did you deny that he's hurting you''you made me look like a fool in front of everyone'I can see see clearly what your eyes are telling me'..you are suffering inside''.where is that strong Pratigya that I used to know. No matter what happens now I will protect you'.

Everybody exits the room'''

Adarsh carries Kamal back to the ward and looks at Kamal who seemed to be disturbed' He puts her down on the bed and to lighten the mood he says 'thank god your room was not too far'.you weigh more than 12 African elephants combined'..

Kamal who has her mouth wide open says 'What, are you trying to say I'm fat?'

Adarsh grins and says 'basically yeah, you are fat, my back was breaking carrying you here, I might need physiotherapy sessions'  

 Kamal is fuming and says 'carry on, wait till I get out of here, no-one will be able to save you from me' Kamal punches Adarsh on the arm and giggle. Adarsh smiles'

 

Meanwhile'.Pratigya and Krishna are in the car park walking up to car'

Krishna breaks the silence''Prat'' I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you'. I don't know what happened''..I'm sorry babes I don't know what came over me''.I was so worried about you'. I didn't know what happened, You didn't inform me what happened'.. you broke your promise''.erm  you should at least phoned me that you were gonna be late

Pratigya: I know but everything happened so fast''.I'm sorry

Krishna holds Pratigyas hand and kisses her' It's ok next time inform me'ok

Krishna is silent for a few moments and then finally speaks'''erm Pratigya, about your friend Kamal''.be careful, she is not as she seems'.I've seen many women like her''she is sly, cunning women, I don't trust her, she will come in between us'''Stay away from her infact don't see her any more''''

Pratigya stares at Krishna and doesn't say anything''..

 



 

 

 

 



Edited by aleena1 - 26 June 2010 at 6:26pm

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see10chhaya007halaaCBrocksPristineSoulkasturika_kashushruthiRshumi.yoga23priyaAbray..CountingStars

khushboo16

Goldie

khushboo16

Joined: 26 October 2008

Posts: 1011

Posted: 27 June 2010 at 12:29am | IP Logged
plz keep waitin now i realy want to know why he is actinn like that

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aleena1

Abray

IF-Sizzlerz

Abray

Joined: 15 June 2009

Posts: 12000

Posted: 27 June 2010 at 12:57am | IP Logged
hey nice update dear....waiting for next chap

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aleena1

shruthiR

IF-Rockerz

shruthiR

Joined: 27 January 2010

Posts: 9125

Posted: 27 June 2010 at 1:03am | IP Logged
It was a very nice chpStar.It's a good thing tht Komal came and interupted otherwise poor Pratigya would've been beaten up so badlyOuch.I seriously have a feeling tht this guy is mentally ill.Looking forward to the next chpSmile

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PristineSoulaleena1

halaa

Senior Member

halaa

Joined: 26 July 2009

Posts: 570

Posted: 27 June 2010 at 1:36am | IP Logged
it was very interesting update. thank GOD pratigya is saved by komal.adarsh and komal both are very cute and sweet in ur ff. can't wait to read why is Krishna always hurting her.thank u for this wonderful update and for ur pm.plz continue soon.

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aleena1

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