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Story-KISSA ULJHE SWALO KA(UPDATED-6th Aug Pg-27) (Page 7)

sneh. Goldie
sneh.
sneh.

Joined: 11 October 2009
Posts: 1293

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 11:09am | IP Logged
Hi bhinder I really like it, your story pace your rhythms all is awesome. but some words are either not clear or I couldn't understand coz dey t in punjabi. otherwise it is really speechless yaar believe me dil se bol rahi hoon Waiting for many more to come. tc and keep rockin dude

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

bhinder.thind

bhinder.thind IF-Dazzler
bhinder.thind
bhinder.thind

Joined: 03 April 2010
Posts: 4013

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 11:16am | IP Logged
Originally posted by sneha_fighter

Hi bhinder I really like it, your story pace your rhythms all is awesome. but some words are either not clear or I couldn't understand coz dey t in punjabi. otherwise it is really speechless yaar believe me dil se bol rahi hoon Waiting for many more to come. tc and keep rockin dude


yeahh in Daya rocker some words were in punjabi...coz that's a rap so obviously had to add some punjabi masala Wink if you would tell me those words dii i would explain to you...and yeah i am coming up with a new one tonight Tongue Wink
bhinder.thind IF-Dazzler
bhinder.thind
bhinder.thind

Joined: 03 April 2010
Posts: 4013

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 2:29pm | IP Logged
Here is my latest CREATION....
 
It describes the present scenario of the CID team and has the basic plea to B.P.Singh sir : " GET BACK ABHI-DAYA"


Hope you like itWink


                                               4. GET BACK ABHI-DAYA


Story main chahe na ho koi secret
Hume tab tak koi na regret
Tab tak khush hain sabhi
As long as we can see Daya alongwith AbhiWink


Story bhi nahi achi
Jokes pe na aye koyi hassi
Voh dono to ACP ke hain 2 hath
Fer bhi Daya-Abhi kyo nahi sath sath??
Cry
Shuru huya hai yeh panga
aaya hai c.i.d mein Sachin naam ka bandaAngry
C.I.D ko samajh raha hain
Kumb ka mela
Agar Daya ka hath chuda ton
Guwaach jayega akela. Wink


Singh saab hum pe thora reham khayiye
Please iss Sachin ko in dono ke Beech main se hatayiye!
Mana ke naye bando ko sath rakhne ke liye chhaiye ability
To fir de do na Freddy ko yeh responsibility...Confused
Uss se Yeh kya comedy circus dekha rahe ho
Hamare joke chura kar Humi ko hasa rahe ho?Wink

Kya baat hain singh saab
Wafadari kya hain zamane ko samjha rahe ho
Apna show chodkar
Sony ke doosro ko hit kara rahe ho?LOL


Forensic ban gayi hain disaster Dead
Yaha akar har koi ban jata hain Flirting ka master
Abhijeet tarika pe lattoo hota jaa raha hain
"waah tarika jii waah tarika jii" farma hi jaa raha hain!
Tarika bhi rang dikha rahi hain
Baki sabko Sir aur Abhijeet ko Naam se bula rahi hain...Angry
Salunke apne naye janme baal kheench raha hain
Bina kisi kaaran ke hi cheek raha hain
Apni bato se ek doosre ko sab jala rahe hain
Deadbody ki aarh main yeh dil mila rahe hain.Shocked
Hum hi jante hain ke hum yeh sab Kaise jhel rahe hain
3 doctor 1 dead body ke sath post-mortem(2) khel rahe hain.LOL


Vivek bhi "dil mil gye"
Ki taal main sur mila raha hain
Akele akele hi tasha ko ice cream khila raha hain
Tasha bhi dilo dil vivek pe mar rahi hai
Uske sath akele janeki zidd kar rahi hainShocked



ACP ko thora shant karvao
Ajkal lodh se jyada he dahaar rahe hain
Taras aata hain un logo pe
Jo inko sahar(sehen) rahe hain
Samne vala admi kho sakta hain apne hosh
Agar koi halke dil ka ho, Boss, koi shak nahi ho jayega behoshConfused

 
Bureau main 13 log 1-1 krke aa rahe hain houli houli
c.i.d se jyada yeh lag rahi hainkoi natak touli.Cry
Humse nahi ho raha yeh sehan
Agar aisa he raha na sach mano Ek din bhag jayega c.i.d ka cameraman.Wink


Pehle bande kam the jo aur la rahe ho
Hume lagta hain thrill ki jagah aaj kal logo ko comdy circus ka promo dekha rahe ho.
Story main age kya hoga
Pehle hi mil jata hain hint.Ouch
Kya samay agaya hain 5-5log le rahe hain
1 admi ke finger print.LOL


Kuch bad ho ya good
We will be quite touchwood...
We will not say anything even on stupid joking
As long as we can see Our Abhi-Daya together rocking.
Meri iss farayd pe khushi ke phool chada do
Kuch bhi karo but Daya-Abhi ko sath-sath la do.
Big smile


Tongue


Edited by bhinder.kamboj - 01 June 2010 at 7:32am

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

Bhavanabsneh.sunnyp1414Shagnikanycsweetie

Shagnika IF-Rockerz
Shagnika
Shagnika

Joined: 02 February 2010
Posts: 7834

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 3:13pm | IP Logged
Hey i am back a being the first one to comment on ur CREATION..I must say The variety in your creations are just SUPERB!!!! Really AWESOME workClap...
 
it has almost every point that we CIDiand have in mind. Some parts are very funny!LOLLOL
that post-mortem-post mortem khel rahe hain part...ohh God, Hilarious!!!!LOLLOL...I am still laughing!!!LOL
 
Cant wait for ur next...complete it fast!!!Big smile


Edited by Shagnika - 31 May 2010 at 3:17pm
totallynotme101 Goldie
totallynotme101
totallynotme101

Joined: 18 January 2010
Posts: 2056

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 3:56pm | IP Logged
now this one was superb
not superb but it was like real cid story great work.............
i like it very very very very infinite times very much.......................
great work.........................
sneh. Goldie
sneh.
sneh.

Joined: 11 October 2009
Posts: 1293

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 11:16pm | IP Logged
now this is what I call dhamaka freakingly awesome Mr. Silent member aasha hain aap hum sab ki aur khas taur par bhinder ki bhavnayee samaj gaye???????

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Shagnika

Bhavanab Coolbie
Bhavanab
Bhavanab

Joined: 31 March 2009
Posts: 23755

Posted: 31 May 2010 at 11:54pm | IP Logged
Mazaa aa gaya Bhinder dil ki saari bhadaas nikaal di,I've read it 3-4 times ab tak and am feeling so happy the way u use words is good yaar khaas kar loved the 4th stanza,gr8 work dude keep it up
Clap Thumbs Up
bhinder.thind IF-Dazzler
bhinder.thind
bhinder.thind

Joined: 03 April 2010
Posts: 4013

Posted: 01 June 2010 at 2:15am | IP Logged
thanks guys looking forward for some creative work by all here Wink

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