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Debate Contest: What Would You Do? (DM-REMIX) (Page 6)

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karandel_2008

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karandel_2008

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Posted: 05 June 2010 at 9:29pm | IP Logged
@Qwertyesque:

Its possible that lesbianism wasn't recognized  in all the states of USA, but was recognized in some states in 90s.

Moreover - "But, it is a basic legal principle under the common and statutory laws that everything that is not forbidden by the common and statutory law is allowed." - wikipedia

In addition, if marriage was not recognised then Lesbian couple would have stayed unmarried, but in living together situation.


I will do some background study on the laws and will tell you if some of the above pointers are valid.


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*Woh Ajnabee*

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*Woh Ajnabee*

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Posted: 05 June 2010 at 9:29pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by qwertyesque

I dont question the topic.. just the time frame...its  like asking what apps would Einstein have on his I dont question the topic.. just the time frame...its  like asking what apps would Einstein have on his iPhone!! :)


LOL

qwertyesque

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qwertyesque

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Posted: 05 June 2010 at 9:32pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by *Woh Ajnabee*

Originally posted by qwertyesque

Originally posted by *Woh Ajnabee*


Labib, this is an irrelevant discussion. No where does it say that the Indian mother was raped. For all we know, she took this step of her own free will and gave birth to this child.
thats not true.. single mom is a social issue in india unlike lesbianism which is a life-style.. illness.. and she (single mom)  didnt take teh step.. she landed into that situation.. again unlike the lesbo's who walk into such situations.. all i am saying in this is comparing apples to oranges...


I agree, the unwed mother is a social issue. However, the unwed mother just in itself is the issue. Where does rape come into play?
Rape is not in the picture.. they were singing in the rain adn had a weak moment.. I dont think the rape should even be considered.. Its absurd,... the guy made her pregnant and died before he cuold marry her...our obsession with rape is so incorrigible....LOL

my_view

Goldie

my_view

Joined: 18 December 2008

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Posted: 05 June 2010 at 9:34pm | IP Logged

Which life would I choose and why?

The best environment for a child to grow up in after basic needs of food, clothing and schooling are met -
A family oriented culture that respects elders, practices high level of tolerance and has proverbial "village" in the form of extended family, friends, neighbors around and not babysitters to help raise the child.
A culture that affirms beliefs in traditions yet is flexible in accepting contemporary ways for self advancement and betterment.
A culture that promotes competition vs individuality and retains connection with people.
Parent(s) who are role model by making the child(ren) higher priority than themselves and providing emotional and familial security (low rate of divorce) and basically putting their own agenda on hold .

Although I wasn't born or raised in India I can still relate to the above and can say that a single mother in India has far better shot at providing all of the above in raising a child than a lesbian family in USA.

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

qwertyesquehindu4lyf

qwertyesque

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qwertyesque

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Posted: 05 June 2010 at 9:52pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by karandel_2008

@Qwertyesque:

Its possible that lesbianism wasn't recognized  in all the states of USA, but was recognized in some states in 90ssince the topic mentioned it was a taboo.. i assume its the states where it wasnt recognized...

Moreover - "But, it is a basic legal principle under the common and statutory laws that everything that is not forbidden by the common and statutory law is allowed." - wikipedia when something can get into the law books.. and wheher ot should be getting their is debatable.. like autism and vaccine.. debates got squished after 20 years.. the homosexuality and mental illness might also be reinstated.. apparently relying on these books doesnt make more sense since, it could be politically motivated as well..

In addition, if marriage was not recognised then Lesbian couple would have stayed unmarried, but in living together situation. right but then they could devastate any kid adopted or otherwise and this basic fact is overlooked by debater who are blinded by the $$ value of such lifestyle.. they would end up like I mentioned earlier...


I will do some background study on the laws and will tell you if some of the above pointers are valid. Agreed... actually i dont want to hijack your debate... you want lesbian parents and cuckoo wants unwed mom.. and I wont interfere there. since sure as hell i  will divert this debate into my world where I dont recognize homosexuality.. as normal...Smile


karandel_2008

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karandel_2008

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Posted: 05 June 2010 at 10:01pm | IP Logged
@Qwertyesque:

In the topic Taboo is from society and not the law - thus taboo doesn't mean that lesbians will be put in jail. If they wont be put in jail then can do what they are doing. Isnt it?

karandel_2008

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karandel_2008

Joined: 09 December 2008

Posts: 5756

Posted: 06 June 2010 at 6:08pm | IP Logged
@Ajnu:


Karan, more people don't automatically signify a stronger family.

Instead of talking about more, I am talking about just 2 people who love each other plus the kid. Read more below.

Don't you think having a second mother will create more problems for the child? He'll have to grow up in a society that is not too keen on the presence of same-sex couples. Imagine him being in school and writing stories about his two moms when everyone is telling the class about their mom and dad. How can you expect a young child to cope with that scenario?


Other mom will also be a huge support for the kid and she can role play as a father and the biological mom can be the mother.

Telling everyone about 2 moms/missing dad, in USA, is not a big problem as compared to telling about the missing dad in India. 1) People in USA are not nosy like that in India 2) In addition, the questions that matter most are the ones that "eat" you. They are the recurring questions for which one doesn't have satisfying answers. Both the moms can easily satisfy the curiosity about missing dad/2 moms because a second person will be present physically. She can say that I am like your father and explain the situation. The kid will have some one acting as father. He/she may miss his/her father, but not in a same way as in the case of unwed mom.

On the other hand, the missing father in the case of kid with unwed mom will be like a huge "why?" and he will only have an emptiness to stare at, apart from his mother and some explanations by the unwed mother.


We all need companionship in our lives, yes, but that does not always mean a significant other. The unwed mother will have family that may support her, she may go out and make friends that will listen to her vent, not everyone needs a significant other to lead their lives.

A friend cannot replace a significant other with whom one can share every secret and feeling. Moreover, just the friend factor is same in both cases because lesbian couples will also have friends. But don't forget that it will be difficult for an ostracized person, in the both cases, to make friends in the society.

Family may not be ready to accept the unwed mother and even if they do then unwed mother will have to listen to all the taunts from her family members on her back. Because family members wont take quietly the social burden and frustration that comes free with the unwed mom.

 
As far as sexual advances go, just because a woman is single does not automatically entail that men will make sexual advances on her. In fact, the fact that it is a small town where presumably everyone knows each other, I doubt such situations will arise due to fear of public humiliation, etc.

Small town also means the problems of law and order in India. In Indian society, people blame woman more than the man for adultery. The above 2 factors are conducive for some men (if they are perverted) to make sexual advances.


And lastly, earning a living --- there are families all across India and in the US that survive on one parent's income.

But, its one of the several inconveniences that unwed mom will have to face. More so if her family decides to abandon her
 
The child is not an "infant", but a teenager who I'm sure is very well able to take care of him/herself.

The scenario given in the debate starts from the point when one is born.

As far as financial support goes, as I said before, just because the woman is an unwed mother does not automatically mean she is alone. And in that case, I'm sure she can work and support herself and her child or receive financial support from her family.

Thats an assumption, but what if she will be alone? In that case its better to have 2 people than one.


Edited by karandel_2008 - 06 June 2010 at 6:14pm

karandel_2008

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karandel_2008

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Posted: 06 June 2010 at 6:24pm | IP Logged
While comparing USA environment and Indian environment, some people have written some points as if they despise the sexual freedom (relatively) of society in USA as compared to that in India.

Dear friends let me tell you that this despising of sexual freedom by the Indian society "is" actually the problem of the unwed mother in the first place. If it was not for this despising or taboo and if society would have accepted it then half of the problems of the unwed mothers would have been solved.

So please tell me what is wrong with sexual freedom if one doesn't harm any third party-- in fact tell me that why do you despise it?



Edited by karandel_2008 - 06 June 2010 at 8:27pm

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