Marrying your cousin is shameful

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Do you think that marrying ur cousin is shameful???

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-Believe- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Hi all
 
Do you think that marrying ur cousin is shameful???
 
Society created these rules and scriptures for practical reasons. Morality has little to do with it. The main problem with inbreeding was the medical and genetic defects resulting from it...,Personly I feel,cousins are like blood relatives and society usually refrains from marrying two people form the case family link, unless it is three or four generation apart....but its true that  In some communities in India, many of the muslim communities in the world, few Sikh communities etc allow cousin marriage. But even in these communities in today's day, though it is not forbidden, it is frowned upon. However in Hindu religion,(I think) it's forbidden, both by the religion and by the law....bt  if two cousins want to marry who are we to stop them !! But I will continue thinking its perverted 😃
 
Views and comments plz
 

 
Edited by Believe - 13 years ago

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MOTHERHOOD thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
If you and your cousin grow up together I feel it is very weird to marry him/her.Actually cousins are like brothers and sisters.How you can marry a person whom you considered your brother/sister.But if your cousin is just an unknown person to you(Maybe you have not met him for years or never seen him)then it is not that much shameful.But for me it is impossible to marry any of my cousins.For me it's really shameful.
I didn't know marrying your cousin is forbidden in Hindi soaps.I have seen cousin marriages in many serials.
Posted: 13 years ago
I personally feel that it is not only shameful, but also around the line of perversity.

Marriage between first cousins is not medically (genetically) good either.

There used to be a time when it was allowed, due to a primitive situation (primitive in today's perspective). Beyond that (i.e. before the medieval or dark ages) it could be due to the lack of people?...

Anyways... I feel that it is more honorable to marry inter-cast, inter-racial, inter-religious, inter-linguistic, inter-nationals ... and promote a healthy practice of tolerance and peace.


_Angie_ thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: Believe

Hi all

 
Do you think that marrying ur cousin is shameful???
 
Society created these rules and scriptures for practical reasons. Morality has little to do with it. The main problem with inbreeding was the medical and genetic defects resulting from  

You are right about the scientific reason behind forbidding inbreeding, but then you have asked whether it is "shameful" & not harmful ! It is definitely harmful for the next generation but as far as shameful is concerned it depends on the prevailing practices in the region at that point of time. marriage between cousins do take place in Hindus eg maharashtrians . Yes, strangely a girl can marry the son of her dad's sis but not dad's bro ...!!! In some south indian communities a girl can marry her maternal uncle . Thats a blood relation too. In these cases it would not be considered shameful by the society even though it may be harmful.
On the other hand we are reading about honour killings amongst the jaat community in haryana (khap killings) . The couple marrying within the same gotra are being hounded and have led to many incidents of suicides.
Once a couple is already married I really dont see the point of all this opposition. Its best to make ppl aware of the harm that inbreeding can cause and then leave them to decide what they want to choose in their life.
Summer3 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
 
 
Vinu ji kya chal raha hai.
Wo haseena agar distant cousin hain to koi baat nahi. Khush raho. shaadi karo.😆
 
 
RamKiSeeta thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
In Hindu religion, at least in many states, for a girl to marry her dad's sister's son is acceptable but not to marry her dad's brother's son. For some reason, dad's brother's kids or mother's sister's kids are seen as siblings, but dad's sister's kids or mother's brother's kids are not.
 
Personally, I feel that is acceptable as long as the couple in question isn't being forced. If two cousins see each other as brother and sister, to marry each other would be disgusting to them and they should not be forced, but if they do not have a problem with it, I do not see why it is shameful. Two of my own cousins married each other and they're leading a happy life and have a little five year old daughter too.
return_to_hades thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

The concept of incest is a more modern concept. Human relationships are more defined in our society. Moreover with the ill effects of in-breeding within the same gene pool we strongly reject such relationships.

 

However, we have to note that many cultures do not see it this way. In many US states as well as in India, marriage between cousins is common. This is due to the fact that cousins are not seen to be siblings and do not view each other as such. It is also a way to ensure marriage within the community/religion that is important to some people. With better understanding of in-breeding this is slowly changing.

 

But I think it is wrong to look down on people for a cultural aspect because they do not see it as a perversion or incestuous relationship – but a committed marriage like any other. Marriage within cousins is common in my community. My family never followed it and raised us cousins to treat each other like siblings, having raksha bandhan, bhai dooj etc. My grandmothers side which is mostly in rural Karnataka still arranges marriages between cousins. They grow up knowing that when they come of age their marriage maybe arranged to a cousin. Of course none of it is forced and they do have an option, and this is becoming much less prevalent. I know a few Southern Christian families also who married cousins. Also many communities who do practice this are trying to be conscientious of picking more distant cousins rather than close ones.

 

That being said any couple ready to conceive should have a full physical and blood test. This is a healthy habit that ensures both people are in good health to conceive, minimizes and diseases being passed on, and can help recognize if there are other potential birth defects or genetic disorders that can be passed on to the child.

Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: Ice-Thinker

I personally feel that it is not only shameful, but also around the line of perversity.


Marriage between first cousins is not medically (genetically) good either.

There used to be a time when it was allowed, due to a primitive situation (primitive in today's perspective). Beyond that (i.e. before the medieval or dark ages) it could be due to the lack of people?...

Anyways... I feel that it is more honorable to marry inter-cast, inter-racial, inter-religious, inter-linguistic, inter-nationals ... and promote a healthy practice of tolerance and peace.


@Magenta:there are billions of couples who got married and are first cousins and leading a happy life genetically.😛
As for promoting a healthy practice of tolerane and peace you can do it anyways with or without supporting inter-racial,inter-religious and inter linguistic marraige....by respecting and loving ppl from all nations,languages and religions.........😊
@Topic:I don't think it is shameful it's rather good as a matter of fact:)...eventhough I cann't deny the genetic aspect...
Edited by Mahi_Way - 13 years ago
Dabulls23 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Within Hindus most don't but some do marry their cousins and it is considered to be OK...In some Mama (Mom's bro) has a first right over niece in marriage...Strange and first i had ever heard of 7 yrs ago....I  Learned alot about this subject being on this forum and DM itself...There was a good debate over it 2-3 yrs back...
 
Personally I would not nor would have my kids marry cousins be it on either side.....After 3rd cousin level it is OK to marry because breading within chances are much less...Blood test is a must in any case...
 
BTW in our joint  family we were raised as siblings and not cousins on  both sides so it was  hard to be involved as such to marry our cousins...
 
To some it is incest while it is perfectly fine for others...😳
 
RTH I totally agree with you on this para and resons mentioned......
 
"That being said any couple ready to conceive should have a full physical and blood test. This is a healthy habit that ensures both people are in good health to conceive, minimizes and diseases being passed on, and can help recognize if there are other potential birth defects or genetic disorders that can be passed on to the child. "
_Angie_ thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
As I see it there appears to be no hard and fast rule regarding what is shameful and what is not. If a practice is being followed by a fairly large number of ppl it does not look out of place and gets accepted however illogical it may be. On the other hand  any unconventional practice wud raise eyebrows even if it has some logic .Social conditioning plays a major role in how we tend to pass judgements.