Joined: 23 April 2009
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Joined: 23 April 2009
Joined: 23 April 2009
'Who caused you to be so scared of the dark Pratigya?' he asked vehemently, "Who has dared to hurt you?"
The question was replied with silence as Pratigya sat astounded before him, rendered speechless. Answer him! Her mind screamed out, tell him the truth.
'Voh, K-krishna' she stammered, looking down at her hands. Her eyes welled up with hot tears of shame as she recalled the man touching her, everywhere.
Krishna's jaw was clenched tightly; his hands were now balled into a fist as he read her reaction.
'Tell me!' he hissed through his clenched teeth, 'who has hurt you?'
Pratigya didn't respond to his question; however the tears now spilling freely down her cheeks spoke of pain and fear in which mere words were unable to convey.
Impatient and frustrated with her silence, Krishna cupped Pratigya's jaw and lifted it towards him.
'Your silence is killing me' Krishna said, 'don't anger me Pratigya'.
Pratigya looked deeply into his eyes and opened her mouth, prepared to tell him everything. Suddenly she snapped her mouth shut as remembered their second meeting in the train. The slight scar on her face had angered him to a terrifying extent. Although he hadn't said anything, his eyes had revealed a certain disgust as he had looked upon her blemished face. If a small scar could disgust him, then what will his reaction be when he sees her scarred filled back? Will he be able to tolerate the fact that she was no longer pure, that she had been touched and used by another man?
Pratigya knew for a fact that Krishna could not withstand another man talking to her, let alone touching her. Then how would he be able to overlook someone actually touching and looking at her intimately? He would discard me, thought Pratigya; he would be so repelled that he will never look at me again.
Her heart would not be unable to bear being rejected again; she wasn't that strong.
'Pratigya'! Krishna shouted as he shook her, 'answer me damn-it'!
Pratigya tried to laugh it off, but her voice sounded shaky; betraying her attempts to appear normal. 'No one has hurt me' she replied with a forced smile.
'Don't lie' he said, 'don't lie to me Pratigya or I wont tolerate it'.
Pratigya shook her head, her eyes remained downcast in avoidance of his gaze 'I'm not lying; honestly no one has hurt me.'
'Then why are you scared of the dark?' he asked.
'Krishna, being scared of the dark is a normal phobia'' she said, 'I've been scared of the dark since I was a child.'
Not satisfied with her answer, Krishna tired to read her face but she continuously turned her face away.
'Then why do you panic when I come close to you?' he asked.
'It's just' Pratigya bit her lips, 'I feel uncomfortable and awkward'.
There was a moment of silence within the room; Krishna sat quietly staring at her whilst Pratigya felt as if she would faint from having a nervous breakdown.
'Are you being honest with me Pratigya?' he asked finally.
'Yes' she replied hastily.
'Then can you say the same thing, facing me and not at your hands?' he challenged.
Pratigya held her breath as she looked up at his face.
'Are you being honest with me Pratigya?' he repeated.
I'm sorry, she thought as she stared at him, but I cannot bear it if you ever look at me with disgust.
'Yes, I'm being honest' she lied as she stared into his eyes.
Krishna nodded his head and walked towards the door; he looked over his shoulder and gave her a final glance. 'Just remember this Pratigya; I despise liars and being lied to.'
Pratigya stared at him wide eyed and afraid, 'I understand' she clarified.
'If I ever find out that you have lied to me, then I will never forgive you', that said he walked out of the room, leaving Pratigya alone in her own misery.
'I'm sorry Krishna' she whispered to herself, 'I'm sorry'.
Pratigya sat in front of the dressing table and stared at her own reflection. She raised trembling fingers to her lips and blushed as she recalled their snow fight and their kiss. She had responded so shamefully and bold, what must he have thought of her?
Pratigya chided herself for her thoughts, she was a married woman and he was her husband, it' wasn't sinful if he touched her. Oh how she wish she were confident enough to be able to muster the courage to display her feelings to him.
Three days ago she had vowed to remain distant with him, to prove that women were not a plaything. But she realized that her coldness and anger only further irritated him, causing him to drastically change into the arrogantly serious man. But today during their snow fight, Krishna had revealed a completely contrasting side of him which was filled with laughter and happiness. He had reacted positively when she had been open and caring with him; he had treated her with affection as opposed to anger. Now it occurred to her, that only her love would be able to alter his thoughts and his way of viewing life. It no longer hurt as much knowing that he did not love her. Her love would be enough to last them forever.
She was a married woman now; her life was now linked with Krishna for seven lifetimes. If she didn't take the fist step into trying to fix their marriage, then their married life would remain strained.
Her thoughts were overshadowed by a disturbing realization. How would she be able to classify herself as a completely married woman if she hadn't even consummated her marriage? How could she allow Krishna to come close to her without having to reveal the scars on her back? Either way he would somehow find out and would question the cause of it. What rationale reply could she possibly give without having to blurt out the truth?
Pratigya snapped out of her thoughts as Krishna walked into the room with a bag in his hand.
'How are you feeling now?' asked Krishna.
Pratigya smiled at his concern, 'pehle se betar'
Krishna nodded his head and placed the bag on the table.
'What's inside the bag?' asked Pratigya curiously.
Krishna shrugged his shoulders, 'nothing important.'
Pratigya waited for Krishna to go into the other room to change before charging towards the bag and looking through it. She was secretly pleased as she looked at the contents of the bag.
She gasped out loud as she held the deep black sari; the texture was so soft and beautifully made. The blouse was a tight fitting halter-neck which thankfully covered most of her back. Following the sari, Pratigya picked up black velvety case. She cautiously opened it and almost shrieked when the sparkling diamond set was revealed. This all must have been very expensive, she thought to herself anxiously. Towards the bottom of the bag, Pratigya saw a couple of DVD's. She picked them up and noticed they were all horror movies. Pratigya shook her head at her husband's unromantic choice of movies to watch during their honeymoon. Surprisingly the last DVD was a Hindi movie, 'Devdas' she read out loud.
She read the synopsis of the movie and had the urge to watch it, since it sounded so romantic.
'Did you choose a movie to watch?' Krishna said from behind.
'Devdas' she replied.
'No!' he said.
'Why not'? She asked surprised.
'I hate romantic movies' he muttered.
'Then why did you buy the DVD'? She asked.
'I didn't, the lady at the store was pestering me to buy it' he replied.
'Then let's watch it' she said.
'I said no Pratigya' he replied.
'Please' she begged.
'No' he replied.
Pratigya placed her hand softly upon Krishna's arm, 'please Krishna' she whispered.
Krishna stared into her eyes, weakening at her pleas 'stubborn woman' he muttered.
Pratigya jumped up happily and without thinking, hugged him in her excitement. Krishna stood still at her unexpected response, savoring this very moment in which Pratigya had for the first time displayed some affection; Pratigya blushed to the roots of her hair as she realized what she had done. She tried to move back but Krishna wrapped his arms around her waist and held onto her tightly.
'I've always told you' he whispered into her ear, 'every time you try to distance yourself from me, I will hold on tighter.'
'Maybe that's why I keep trying to move away' she whispered back, playfully into his ear.
Krishna held her face gently in his hands as he moved in closer and closer, until his lips were only inches away from hers. He leaned in closer but Pratigya placed her finger on his lips, stopping him from getting any closer.
'Let's watch the movie' she whispered with a slight smile.
'You're driving me crazy woman' he replied in frustration.
Pratigya laughed at him knowingly.
*hamesha tumko chaha –song playing in the background*
'Pratigya, you've been crying ever since the movie has started' said Krishna, bored out of his mind.
'No I haven't' replied Pratigya hastily as she quickly wiped away her tears.
'This is such a stupid movie' he remarked.
'No it isn't' replied Pratigya defensively, 'it's such a beautiful love story'.
'This is a love story?' asked Krishna, acting to be surprised. 'The guy is watching the girl get married to someone else and the coward also sends her off in the palanquin' he finished off with disgust.
'His sacrificing his love for her' she replied, 'only true lovers can do such a thing'!
'What nonsense are you bickering on about'! Snapped Krishna. 'Only cowards do things like that! This notion of sacrifice is only an excuse to cover up the fact that they couldn't get the girl.'
Pratigya gasped in outrage, 'how dare you call Devdas's love cowardly!'
'Why are you getting all defensive over a movie character?' asked Krishna, laughingly.
'Because what you're saying is wrong!" she replied.
"What have I said that's wrong?" retorted Krishna, "If he loved her, he wouldn't stand their and watch her become someone else's. If he loved her he wouldn't have ran off the first time when she had come to him. If he loved her, he would have stopped the wedding and taken her away!'
'He loved her that's why he stood their and watched her get married to someone else!' she snapped back, 'He loved her that's why he remained respectively quiet, he loved her that's why he didn't do anything out of fear of ruining her reputation!'
'At the end of the day, where's that going to take him?' he asked, 'for the sake of society, he remained quiet; for the sake of her reputation he remained quiet. But years later when you look back at your life, all you will see is your reputation built for the sake of others, but you will never see your love again."
'What's the point of such reputation, of such respect when you don't have your love standing beside you?' he asked.
'You speak as If you know what it feels to love!' she said.
'I do-don't' he said swiftly, 'I'm just saying what I believe.'
'I thought you believed that love wasn't manly?' she asked suspiciously.
'It isn't and that's why I hate this movie' he replied.
'But just then you were talking all highly about what it means to love' she said.
'This movie has messed with your head woman' he remarked.
'Why are you changing the topic for?' she asked.
'Because I feel like it' he replied stubbornly, 'now are you going to continue watching or can I put on the horror movie.'
'No I'm watching it' she replied quickly.
'Kaun kambakht bardasht karne ke liye peeta hai?'
'ee loh' Krishna began, preparing to criticize the movie again.
'shh' whispered Pratigya as she moved closer towards the TV, tears streaming down her eyes.
'Hum toh peete hai ke yahapar beth sake, tumhe dekh sake, tumhe bardasht kar sake'
'Bardasht? Madhuri?' asked a perplexed Krishna, 'what is wrong with this guy, how can you not tolerate her, she's gorgeous!'
'But he loves Paro!' she whined, 'how can he look at another!'
'How can he not!' exclaimed Krishna, 'what guy can ignore a beauty who is willing to be with you'.
'Devdas would never betray Paro's memories with another' Pratigya replied defensively.
'Pratigya, this is all lies, men don't have this kind of control' he said, 'if a girl is willing then why not?'
Pratigya stopped the movie and glared at him. 'What are you trying to imply?'
'I'm not implying anything, I'm just saying in reality we don't have that kind of control' he said.
'So if another girl comes up to you and is willing to be with you, would you cheat on me?' she asked.
'Will she be pretty?' he joked.
Pratigya stood up and threw the control away and walked off fuming in anger.
'Hey where are you going?' he asked, still laughing. "Don't you want to watch the rest of the movie?'
Pratigya tucked herself in the bed, 'no I'm tired.'
Krishna stood up and walked towards the switch, intending to turn the lights off.
'Don't turn off the lights!' Pratigya exclaimed.
Krishna sighed in remembrance and walked towards the bed, lying down beside her.
An awkward silence filled the room as Krishna laid on his back staring at the ceiling, whilst Pratigya had turned on her side, staring into space.
Pratigya felt Krishna's arm snaking around her waist, pulling her towards his chest.
'Are you angry?' he asked innocently.
'No why should I be?' she replied fumingly.
'Because you are jealous' he replied triumphantly.
Pratigya rolled over and faced him, oblivious at how sizzingly close they were lying beside each other
"Jealous and me"? She asked irritatingly, 'never, you can go with all your Madhuri's or whomever you want for all I care."
Pratigya tried to roll back to the other side but Krishna inched her closer towards him, 'But I only want you' he whispered.
Pratigya looked away, 'that's not what you were saying before'.
'I wasn't talking about myself, I was talking about other men who are weak' he replied, 'I have no need for another woman when I have a headache like you' he joked.
Pratigya tried to squirm away from his gasp, 'don't touch me' she hissed at him.
'You can't take jokes can you' he said, 'what a serious wife I have'.
'I'm sick of your constant teasing, why can't you talk seriously with me' she complained.
'Your mine and I don't want or need another' he said with a serious expression.
Pratigya stopped moving and looked up at Krishna; He looked down with a severe expression then suddenly laughter crinkles appearing at the corner of his eyes as he broke into a smile.
'Was that serious enough?' he laughed.
'You!' she gasped out, but soon her words were cut off by his passionate kiss.
'You talk too much' he whispered as he removed the strands of her hair away from her face and resumed kissing her cheeks.
He caressed her arms, moving his hands up and down, softly, giving a ticklish sensation.
Pratigya looked away, a blush spreading throughout her whole body at the tingling sensation of his touch.
From the corner of her eyes, she thought she saw something scurrying across the floor.
Pratigya froze as her eyes frantically scanned the room. Was it just a fragment of her imagination or did she really see something run towards the bed.
'Even at home you stare at the floor and now in this hotel you're staring at the floor again' he protested.
'I thought I saw something' she said, continually looking around.
'You only need to look at me' he said possessively as he tilted her chin towards him and placed a kiss on her jaw, and her chin.
Pratigya tried to ignore her paranoid feelings and focus her attention on Krishna. However this time she heard something scurrying around and this time it was dangerously close.
Pratigya turned her head towards the noise, her eyes widened in absolute fear as she came face to face with her fear.
It's long thin body, black scaled skin and long tail stood still at the table right beside the bed. It's tiny hands and feet popped out of the body, threatening to run towards her.
It's almost invisible eyes stared right into Pratigya's eyes, without removing eye contact, the creature scurried closer and closer.
Time stood still as Pratigya gasped for breath, her whole body trembling in great spasms of fear. The evil thing was so close!
"Lizard!!!!!!!!!" she screamed with all of her might.
Pratigya desperately wrapped her dupatta over her body, ceaselessly trying to cover her now exposed back to prying eyes. She ran in the corridor, frantically trying to locate her room before Krishna saw her in this state. Whilst running, Pratigya looked over her shoulder and accidently bumped into a hard chest. The impact of her collision caused her to fall back but before she could land on the hard floor, the man's arm snaked around her waist, preventing her fall. She looked up thankful but soon her gratitude was replaced with surprise,
'Aryan'! she gasped into his face.
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