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my naksh ff(part 4 edited completely) (Page 3)

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anjali1790

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anjali1790

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Posted: 18 November 2009 at 10:17pm | IP Logged

the 2nd and 3rd part was awesomeClap!waiting 4 the next partDay Dreaming!

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_Dipsi_

IF-Rockerz

_Dipsi_

Joined: 20 August 2009

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Posted: 18 November 2009 at 11:16pm | IP Logged
very well written...realistic tooo...pls cont soon

.Sunshine.

IF-Rockerz

.Sunshine.

Joined: 26 March 2009

Posts: 9219

Posted: 19 November 2009 at 8:28am | IP Logged
part 3 was rlllllllllly gd...
liked it alot....
u hv rlllly worked on it....u hv improved on editin too!!!!!!!
I wld request u 2 send me a pm wen u update czu i neva cum 2 noe tht u hv updated!!!!!!!!
 

shiraja

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shiraja

Joined: 12 November 2009

Posts: 259

Posted: 19 November 2009 at 9:12am | IP Logged
thank you all now i"ll post the part 4.actually in part 2 and3 i wanted to write something else but while i was editing the story i changed my mind i thought not to bring naitik so soon from shimla but when i saw tuesday episode i felt really bad for naksh and so at glance i decided to change the whole plot.well one thing i want to say ther will be less or not at all any maheshwari scenes because i luv naksh only not any one else.well in this part i will make realize bm to change her attitude towards akshar then gm because these two woman need somebody to realize them this.well heres the part 4 part 4
akshara cooks food for everyone.everyone gathers to the dining table. dj ask akshar to serve food.she  starts feeding everyone.bm took out the chappati she is shocked to see no ghee spread on it .gm sees this she makes an anger face then she says akshara i had told u earlier only that ghee must be spread on chappati why don't u understand this.akshara feels bad. rb says"daddajee akshara bitiya ko hamare sehat ki kuch zyaada hi fikr hai isliye to usne bilkul satwik bhojan pakaya hai".dj says u r right rb iam impressed that bahu cares a lot for naitik and his tire.naitik feels ashame.the trio nandini,mohit and rashmi also laugh.dj says to naitik that today u rest at home tomorrow u come to the office.then dj says bahu i m impressed by u so ask me what u want.akshara says dj u have given me everything so i don't need anything else.rashmi says bhabhi ask u'r gift rb also says ask.akshara looks at naitik he also nods then akshara says "dj main apse jo maango gi aap mujhe dijeyega"he also nods then akshara says dj nandini didi bahut achi kavitayein likhti hai unhe first prize mila hai to kya wei editor se milne jaa sakti hai?dj becomes silence gm and bm says akshara u know that in our family no girl or bahu can do job but dj says nandini bitiya tumhe kavita likhne ka bahoot shauk hai to tu mujhse kahti main teri har khwaish puri karta tu zaroor ja.everyone becomes happy for nandini.nandini then ask akshara to come near akshara come then she hugs her.nandini askbm and gm to take her to temple.rashmi says didi "kya main aur bhabhi bhi apke saath chale"nandini nods.but gm interupts that if everyone goes then who will  take care of the house.naitik also says maa is right.nandini,rashmi and mohit understand this so she doesn't force her.mohit says that he will leave as he will set up an appointment.when everyone leaves naksh are free at home naitik then come near to akshara and gives her a hug.akshara says what are u doing naitik then he says this is just an installment well i want to give u something more.[friends in the next part there will be nakshs romance because i"ll make gm &bm to realize this]
 In the car bm says she is very happy for nandini then she says she will be more happy when she will get married.nandini says i don't want to get married.gm says why beta?see ur bhabhi is so happy.nandini says choti maa do u really think that akshara is happy?bm says yes.she says ur wrong.gm face falls down.she says whats wrong when she does not take pallu?whats wrong if she wanted to go to shimla with naitik ?whats wrong if naitik takes her to cinema?bm says this is not their tradition.nandini says in our tradition grooms are not allowed to meet with their bride but naitik used to go with them and choti maa knows this before their alliance was fixed naitik met her twice.bm says because in their first meet akshara didn't spoke anything due to shy.bm says what u want to say pls say clearly.nandini then says as naitik is the only child of our house like wise akshara is the only daughter in her house even after 3 generation so don't u think she was kept as a princess as naitik is treated as prince. u care a lot for me so after if i get married then won't u care for me?bm says how can mother not care for her daughter?then the same is with akshara's mother too ma.after i and rashmi would  leave this house then won't u will allow us to come to this house.gm says after all this is urs house too then choti maa why dont u allow her to go to maayka?gm says but she goes to her pihar regularly.but choti maa u allowed her to go only on occasions and when her mom was unwell.most of the time u become angry just because naitik gives attention to her more than u. gm says it isnot like that beta but she do mistake then nandini says that how can u expect that the culture and tradition which she had followed for 19 yrs how can she change in just a month?gm and bm understand what nandini wanted to say so they say that they are very sorry then nandini says u should say sorry to akshara not to anyone else because u both have hurted her nor me or anyone else she even says u both always feel that akshara is the culprit and nobody else and u even mistrusted her when i was silent.bm and gm says that they have understood what she wanted to say so now they are not going to mistrust her anymore.
 
how was this i hope u all liked this.pls give me more and more replies and next part would be naks only and nobody else.i hope u all liked this part.thank u for all u'r lovely comments.     
  


Edited by shiraja - 20 November 2009 at 7:28am

The following 7 member(s) liked the above post:

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yrkkhluvinangel

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yrkkhluvinangel

Joined: 09 August 2009

Posts: 1205

Posted: 19 November 2009 at 9:45am | IP Logged
very nice...........make it a l'll longer next time, if possible.........................else, wonderful job, dear................and more Naksh romance, next time pls!

tanya.dsouza

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tanya.dsouza

Joined: 29 September 2009

Posts: 474

Posted: 20 November 2009 at 2:46am | IP Logged
really nice

ZumSrK.

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ZumSrK.

Joined: 02 July 2006

Posts: 29679

Posted: 20 November 2009 at 2:48am | IP Logged
loved all the 4 parts...
its very nice continue soon...

Edited by zummi03 - 20 November 2009 at 3:03am

skfan

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skfan

Joined: 10 June 2005

Posts: 589

Posted: 20 November 2009 at 3:24am | IP Logged
nice start ...do continue..

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