Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems


Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems
Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems

Death Talkies: Wheel of Time [Apr/04 P66] (Page 38)

-Sookie- IF-Dazzler

Joined: 09 January 2009
Posts: 2515

Posted: 09 February 2010 at 9:10pm | IP Logged

Boxed In

She was a jaded prostitute and he was a jilted singer. They shared a street corner, few coins and a very rarely a smoke. He sang songs about changing seasons, distant friends and forgotten love.

"My body is my temple", he had once heard her say.

"Which God is worshipped there?" A slurry question had followed.

"My mind", she had replied.

"What does that make your heart then?" The slurry voice sounding obnoxiously cynic had continued.

"Pretty much useless", she had replied airily. He had not missed the underlying melancholy.

On that night, he sang songs of great tragedies involving both mind and heart. They had shared a look when he sang about a young girl losing her heart to a handsome and mysterious man from a distant land. She turned away before he could analyze her eyes and study the pattern of the tears caught in her eyelashes. A pause in the sound from his violin and she was driving away with a stranger.

He felt he missed her then.

Sound of palm meeting cheek followed by revving of an engine which had endured a particularly long life reverberated in the street corner on a dull autumn evening. His slumber was broken and the haze after a sleep slowly lifted. In front of him was a shivering and trembling form. He recognized her immediately and was not so surprised when he realized that it would only take him a moment to recognize amidst a million. He had simply pulled her from the sidewalk and hugged her to his side and shared his blanket. Her silent tears had wet his worn out shirt and burned his skin. Would her kiss make it all better or will slaying the man who reduced her to this would make his burned skin heal?

That night, he sang song of a warrior cursed with to be in love with people who would never return the love. He held her for the rest of the night.

He wondered if his talent for deriving conclusions on a person's mood based on a look, a sigh, a word solely revolved around her or if it was genuine. He had never bothered to define the affection and attraction he felt for her. The pace in which her heels clicked told him about the way she had spent her day and how she exactly felt at the moment.

"Sing me a song which you are never going to sing. Sing me a song which everyone has forgotten. Sing me the song which you only sang in your dreams. Sing me the song which made you, you." He failed to read what she was thinking from her voice. Was it disappointment? Hopelessness? Or was that a resigned acceptance of defeat from life? He did not know.

"What will I get in return?" Nothing in the world came for free. When one takes, the other has to receive something in return. That's why he sang songs and did not mutely beg.

"A few hours with me or some cash or food and shelter or anything your heart desires", she replied looking straight into his eyes.

"Anything my heart desires?" There was an intangible swoosh of happiness which rushed into his body.

"Yes. Anything." She sounded mildly amused.

"Give me the smile you gave to your first crush when you were no more than ten. Give me the first kiss you gave the handsome man whose name you do not remember. Give me that hug you gave your best female friend when she got her heart broken. Give me that sigh of pleasure you get when you drink hot soup on a cold winter night. Give me the touch you gave your mother whenever she felt that everything was going down. Will you give these things to me?" He crossed his fingers and let out a long breath.

"All of these and everything else you would want." Her gentle smile was broken.

 "You are leaving, aren't you?"

"Yes", she sighed.

"Will you be back?" Now he sounded broken.

"I will not."

"Tell your heart to always remember the fiddler who made these demands."  

"It already does."

"Don't die."

"I am sorry."

Under the dimly lit street lamp, she smiled.


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Prasanthi IF-Rockerz

Joined: 24 June 2008
Posts: 5361

Posted: 09 February 2010 at 9:21pm | IP Logged
reserved for now. this time pucca promise to be back by evening.
Here I am!
That was a very sad and painful one. Their heart can only wish but cannot realise. Hmmm.I liked his demands and her answer for them. Thanks for the pm!

Edited by Prasanthi - 10 February 2010 at 1:31am

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Sur_10 Goldie

Joined: 23 August 2009
Posts: 1811

Posted: 09 February 2010 at 9:23pm | IP Logged
Hi Sookie*
That was amazing...2 underdogs loving each other with an unnamed passion...beautifully written....
those lines when she asks him 2 sing a song and when he tells her what he wants in return are my favourite....
U know this might sound a little strange but I have saved ur stories from death talkies in my pc....they are too good....
And the end was too tragic
thanku for the pm

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spln IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 06 December 2007
Posts: 10942

Posted: 09 February 2010 at 9:25pm | IP Logged
aite, possibly a tough statement, even unfair - but i have to say, do u recall the word cliche precisely? - there's a thing about cliche and cynics - they want to call everything usual cliche, but thats what they think... if being 'norma' is cliche  and expected - when u expect only cynical stuff (read never meeting to meet but to part alone) i suppose that becomes about the same .. ?

to be honest, i didn't not like the writing of it in general - it was just the knowing -ness about it, that sort of lessened my intrigue - i think u'd know what i mean...

technically, sweetcheeks, even morbid stuff should vary its trend, should it not? just an observation at that, and u can come hit me on the chat if  get all mad reading the comment :P ...

that said - i like the irony of her opening phrase - my body is a temple - not the further explanation on it, but just that ... quirky and ironic!


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RadiantTreasure IF-Dazzler

Debate Mansion Forum Banner Contest Winner
Joined: 17 June 2009
Posts: 3375

Posted: 10 February 2010 at 4:37am | IP Logged
hey sookie*
aha..so u atlast updatedLOL

thats so different again,,,i said that hundred times but will say again....
i could actually feel the pain she was going through...she was fed up of her life n he always made cheer...he protected her,,,i feel...he wanted to make her happy n feel alive but she was already dead,,somewhere...

What does that make your heart then?"
"Pretty much useless"

"Tell your heart to always remember the fiddler who made these demands."
"It already does."

These two show a connection for me...a heart which she thought was pretty useless now wants remember him,,his demands....!!!

thanks for PM!!!

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Mridhula Newbie

Joined: 27 March 2009
Posts: 38

Posted: 10 February 2010 at 5:28am | IP Logged
beautiful, loved it!

it was pleasant, and it conveyed their feelings without having to write them all down.. :)

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aish_punk IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 11 January 2008
Posts: 20577

Posted: 11 February 2010 at 6:30am | IP Logged
hey sookie..nice story..
she was prostitute..but she did'nt necessary have to be cheap..n she was caught in something maybe she did'nt wanna do..
he met her n sang songs about her..n they knew each other more than anyone had ever known them..
she did'nt wanna leave him..so she slapped the person n sent him away..n they shared the night..
his proposal style was cute..but she did'nt accept it..n had to go..but was she returning to her normal life?
thnx 4 d PM
do write more

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RadiantTreasure IF-Dazzler

Debate Mansion Forum Banner Contest Winner
Joined: 17 June 2009
Posts: 3375

Posted: 12 February 2010 at 3:12am | IP Logged
hey sookie!!

i will be busy with my studies for next few months so i may comment late on u r death talkies n u r FF's -grim/infinity/colours etc,,...if u ever update themLOL ,,,,,hope u understand n wont mind..but please do send me Pms..will read when ever i get time n will try to comment,,,


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