Why Marry? - Page 2

Originally posted by: gumsum

Sorry to say but this is the most absurd logic you mention in your post to favor polygamy. Some people believe in complex ideas and complex solutions to life's simple problems\needs, polygamy may be the best fit for them. To answer the question in  your post "Why marry?" I would say that it is an individual choice. For me marriage is important. Each relationship in my opinion requires efforts- it requires love, affection. honest, trust and many other things. To state it in simple terms, to build a strong relationship, both the parties should be fully invested in it and that is what marriage stands for. But if someone is just looking for some fun time then they do not need to marry.

I can go to  great lengths to argue on each o your points but I do not feel like. In any case I am not a good debater.

 

You say you can refute each argument, but choose not to. I do not think you can claim any logic to be absurd unless you actually refute it or prove it to be absurd.

On what basis can you claim that polygamy is more complex. I can say that going with the flow of emotions is simpler than limiting emotions to norms, rules, regulations and expectations.

Do not loving relationships exist without marriage? I am not only talking of romantic liasons here? Do you need to sanctify your friendships, your everyday relationships through some elaborate ritual or commitment? Are friends, siblings of lesser value because we do not make commitments? If we can have more than one friend, what is so wrong in loving more than one person? Cannot love trust, affection be there for many people? Why do you feel that if someone does not marry they are only looking for fun? Moreover, how does love, trust, affection etc systematically prove that monogamy makes more sense?

Originally posted by: *Woh Ajnabee*

Are you conspiring to keep me on IF today? Gotta go, my thoughts tomorrow! :)

I think you cannot keep away. Logging back in at 2 Am on an exam day. 😛

P.S. You're not rethinking our marriage, are you? 😆

As I wrote my post, I wondered what you would have to say.
My love, tumhara dil kya kehta hain.

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

Why is monogamy so emphasized in our society?

Souro answered this part brilliantly.  Human beings are inherently possessive and tend to be jealous.  Monogamy takes care of thi inherent nature.

 

Why are relationships evaluated in perceptions of love, commitment and long term sustainability?

Who evaluates the relationships?  The partners in a relationship themselves bring this misery on them - they have this constant need to justify them staying in the relationship.  Others are too busy either evaluating their own relationships or trying to hook up with someone in order to start a relationship.   

 

Society was not always monogamous. In fact in ancient times polyandrous relationships were prevalent amidst all global cultures. Why have we made that switch to monogamy? Is monogamy really for the better of society?

I think polygamous relationships were far more common than polyandrous relationship in ancient times.  The reason for prevalent polygamy was the life style - too many battles and wars were fought all over the world.  This resulted in more men dying than women.  Hence, women not only outnumbered men but given the reproduction process of humans, it was hard to wait full nine months to get one heir.  Hence, men married multiple women so that they can procreate more.  Polygamy made sense in those days.

 

One issue with polyandry was that it did not address replacing lost lives in the battle fields AND it made the situation worst in a society which already had women outnumbering the men.  Then there were issues establishing the parentage of the child. 

 

As society changed, became more civilized and fought less, the disparity between men-to-women ratio also disappeared and the need to procreate more also went away.  Hence, monogamy replaced polygamy as it made more sense with the changing times.

 

Whether monogamy is really better for the society or not will make an interesting debate.  I hope you can keep this thread alive till Monday so that I can take part in that debate too.

Edited by King-Anu-Lives - 14 years ago

Originally posted by: shaktheback

for kids 😳

Originally posted by: King-Anu-Lives

Edit: I think I now understand what you wanted to say. Interesting topic.

Originally posted by: kuhu.kuhu

Ek kahawat hai ...

 

Shaadi hai Delhi  ka laddoo..Jo khaya woh pastaya , jo nahi khaya woh bhi pastaya...

 

Too sleepy to comprehend even what i just said😆 ...will come back tomorrow once my brain starts working..

Till then

Adios amigos....

 

 

 

 

 

Originally posted by: shaktheback

for kids 😳

As Naina Catherine Kapur - woh to ho jayenge. Shaadi karne ki kya zaroorat hain.

Originally posted by: sneha0601

I know you are hinting directly at RTH 😆, therefore sorry to interrupt, but my one question is:

@Bolded: You say that right? Because I know about 3 couples who have a live-in relationship since years, one of them its been nearly 7 years now, and in no way, did I see the love decreasing, the honesty changing, the affection becoming rare, or the trust disappearing... And they do not have just fun, they share responsibilities, share their lives, share their passions, wants, share their sorrows and difficulties! It was just their mutual decision never to get married AND never to have children! So basically, I don't believe that it's marriage only that could bring all these in a relationship... After all, since when has any relationship depended on vows or legal contracts or paper hassles? 😉


I personally am for marriage, and will always be! Will post my views tomorrow... But the only question that intrigues me, and actually that I find interesting is: How does one define marriage at the end? Is it the vows or the papers only? Can't two people be married even without all those? Why does marriage come under the legal aspect? Can't two people believe they are married even if they aren't under official terms? 😃

I totally get it. Marriage is just another name for commitment. the couples you know are wonderful people with great values in my opinion. No relationships aren't (shouldn't be) bound by papers or vows but each relationship needs enough chance before calling it off. Unfortunately majority of people do not have enough self control to be committed to a realtionship without a contract and some just needs that security before they get into one. For them marriage exists. For others its just in their minds but it is there in some form.