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~*~AN Fiction Thread 2~*~ (Page 142)

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Amy_an

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Amy_an

Joined: 15 December 2010

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Posted: 04 February 2011 at 12:47am | IP Logged
Hey Guyz,
 
Updated Part 14 of FF Its only you.. Hope u'll enjoy it.. Kindly drop in ur comments, if u like it :) 
 
 
Cheers,
Namy

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jsha

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DelusionalMe

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DelusionalMe

Joined: 21 August 2010

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Posted: 06 February 2011 at 2:00am | IP Logged
Hello guys. I had written a scene few months back as my friend Shale persuaded me to write one but I could not gather courage to post it as everyone here is too good in writig scenes , ffs n all. But today I am posting this small scene here. I know my writing is quite immature but since its my first try, so pls bear with me n pls comment. Any kind of criticism to improve my writing is most welcome.

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DelusionalMe

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DelusionalMe

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Posted: 06 February 2011 at 2:01am | IP Logged
                     So here goes the scene

He was impatiently waiting for her pacing the length of the room for the umpteenth time. "What was taking her so long?", he thought. He wanted to go upstairs but then decided against it. She always considered him impatient & he did not want to give her another opportunity to taunt him. But when the clock announced that it was 8, then the dam of his patience broke down. He reached the stairs and marched towards the bedroom. When he opened the door, he was shocked rather puzzled to look at the sight before him. He saw that she was sitting on the bed with all her clothes spread on bed, on floor, everywhere. He went upto her and sat besides her, on his knees, just to have a look at her face. He then cupped her cheek slightly, made her look towards him and then uttered "What happen? why are you not ready yet?" She looked up, straight into his eyes, with tears in her own eyes. He became a bit concerned this time to see that. He again asked, with concerned lace voice, " What happened baby?" After a few seconds, she replied in a childlike voice, "I am confused, I don't know what should I wear," he was relieved to hear that and his lips broke into a small smile. He softly replied, "Just that! You have a ton of clothes lying out there & still find it difficult to pick one out of them!!" "Yes", she replied, "That is what the problem is. I have so many clothes that I am finding it difficult to pick one out of them. I want to look different and special today, afterall its our 1st month anniversary". He chuckled vat her answer. She made a face looking at his response but just then, he replied, "You always look beautiful in whatever you wear and then turned towards his cabinet and brought out a gift wrapped in beautiful paper. He held it out for her and said, "Well, I thought that I will give it to you at 12 midnight to end the day wid a surprise for you but since you seem all worked up so I better give this to you now." She took the gift from his hand and very excitedly started unwrapping the gift. She was very pleased to find a beautiful offshoulder black dress that reached just above her knees. The dress was simple, yet elegant & classy. She hugged him and said, "I'll be back in 5 minutes." And after mumbling a thanks she went into yhe bathroom. He then looked at the clock and then thought to himself, "5 minutes…hmmm…I don't think so." Then looking at the sight before him, clothes lying everywhere, he shook his head and started picking the clothes & put them on the side table besides the bed. Just then, bathroom door opened and she came out, looking stunning and hot,(that is what came to him when he saw her), just a bit of makeup and black silky hair that were clamped on one side of her shoulder revealing her back. He turned to her and looking straight into her eyes said, "I think we should plan dinner someday else." She looked confused at him. "I mean the the sight before me is just too beautiful. You're looking delectable", he winked, "I'm not feeling like going out, just want to keep on looking at this gorgeous lady in front of me", he replied. She blushed under his compliments, then slightly punched on his chest. "Just get the car and I'll be there in a minute." As he turned, she held his hand from behind. He stopped and looked back at her with questioning eyes. "You are also looking hot hubby dear and this blue shirt is my fav.", she winked. "Not as hot as you wifey", he replied with his most charming smiles. He started walking towards the door but then turned, as Nikki went near the dressing table to put sum lipgloss, and said, "I hate strawberry" "Huh…??", she asked confused. He pointed towards the lipgloss in her hand and said, "Put that grape flavor on….I prefer that", he said simply. When it dawned to Nikki what he said, she blushed and turned him, pushed him towards the door but Abhi turned and said, "Oh, I forget one thing." And put his hands in the pocket of his black denims and brought out a beautiful small box. He went upto her, turned her towards the mirror and asked her to close her eyes. She opened her mouth to ask something but then did what he said. He stood behind her and brought his hands in front of his face over her shoulders and opened the box and said, "Open your eyes." She was surprised to see a small diamond necklace in the box and exclaimed. "Its so beautiful Abhi." He then chained it around her neck tickling her at the same time. He brought her mouth near her neck and she gasped in surprise. He then just clamped the chain's hook with his teeth, lips slightly brushing against her neck. She felt butterflies in her stomach, enjoying his touch at the same time, but then as he moved back, she said, "I'm still very keen to go for dinner. You better stop surprising with me gifts." He then slightly turned her to face him. Giving her a small peck on her cheek, he said, "Whatever I do for you, its just not enough, for you being the biggest gift of my life." They looked at each other for a few good minutes with love, appreciation, respect for each other that reflected in their eyes. Then when the the clock announced that it was 9, they finally broke out from their trance and left for the dinner hand in hand.

THE END


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Meera01bmtd18ANfan_1810mitzificationAbhiNikiLuverANfanujala26Amy_anwow123piya-jiyaloveaboveall.hapinezz13

Amy_an

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Amy_an

Joined: 15 December 2010

Posts: 6696

Posted: 06 February 2011 at 2:20am | IP Logged

Nehu, itz fantabulousClapClap

*res*

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DelusionalMe

wow123

IF-Rockerz

wow123

Joined: 23 September 2009

Posts: 8257

Posted: 06 February 2011 at 6:49am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Nehu_1

Hello guys. I had written a scene few months back as my friend Shale persuaded me to write one but I could not gather courage to post it as everyone here is too good in writig scenes , ffs n all. But today I am posting this small scene here. I know my writing is quite immature but since its my first try, so pls bear with me n pls comment. Any kind of criticism to improve my writing is most welcome.

Thanks so much neha that u have taken this step to write one scene. I am happy that u have posted this OS as u finally agreed of my request. See we never understand anything until we try, so we always have to keep trying things on our own.
 
Really for trying new things in ur life, it always need courage which u show today. So u deserve the appallaus for this attempt. Keep attempting this courages step in ur life n i m sure u go long way in success.ClapClap
 
Now i have to read ur os and comment.

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jshaDelusionalMe

wow123

IF-Rockerz

wow123

Joined: 23 September 2009

Posts: 8257

Posted: 06 February 2011 at 7:09am | IP Logged
Neha,
 
Os is very nice and very well written. You are not at all immature in writing. I like the scene specially grape flavor he preferedLOL.
 
Well i like it but don't stop writing from now onward. I want lot of scens like this from ur side. Keep going girl.
 
Love
Shale 

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jshaDelusionalMe

wow123

IF-Rockerz

wow123

Joined: 23 September 2009

Posts: 8257

Posted: 06 February 2011 at 9:36am | IP Logged
Hi guys
 
I have started a new AN ff. Please check this out and leave your valuable comment.
 
 
 
If not interested than ignore it
 
Love
Shale


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jsha

Khushboo_AN

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Khushboo_AN

Joined: 10 December 2009

Posts: 17197

Posted: 06 February 2011 at 11:04am | IP Logged
res

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jshaDelusionalMe

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