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Any Real Life Balika Vadhu's

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shona.

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shona.

Joined: 26 December 2006

Posts: 8628

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 1:20pm | IP Logged
hey guys,
i was wondering if any of u know any real life Balika Vadhus

i know one....she lives near our house in india n is in her 60s now.
she got married when she was just 12 and has 6 kids now!
She had to miss out studies and had to pick up household chores quickly but luckily for her she didnt have a strict dadisa in her life...she said she had to adjust to life fast though coz she did have a rather strict father in law...shes a great person n all n a big fan of BV

so do u guys know any real life Balika vadhus...plz do share

shona.

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ammoos

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ammoos

Joined: 01 March 2008

Posts: 17608

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 3:44pm | IP Logged
Yes, I knew one.. she is no more.. i know about her that she had her first child at the age of 13 and ended up having 13Shocked.... but 3-4 didnt survive much and the rest grown up and have grand children and all... dont know at which age she got married..

one2none

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one2none

Joined: 11 June 2008

Posts: 461

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 5:49pm | IP Logged
My grandmother was married when she was 9.  They still have this custom in in UP, Bihar, MP and Rajasthan villages, but most of them try to postpone Gauna until the girl is 13 or above.   My Bhabhi lives in Varanasi and her maid's daughter was married off when she was 10 yrs old. Now she is 13 and helps her mom.  They have not decided on her guana yet because she is big help to mother and they can work in more homes together and make more money. But they need to do it soon as mom is being pressurized from daughter's in-laws... Sure they need help too...Angry

ammoos

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ammoos

Joined: 01 March 2008

Posts: 17608

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 8:56pm | IP Logged
Poor girls..dont get to go to school and will have to work for their entire life...Cry

RockChicGirl

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RockChicGirl

Joined: 04 October 2004

Posts: 44133

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 10:48pm | IP Logged
my granny was a real life BV who married at 16. but she had supportive in-laws. my maid got all her daughters married by 13. all of them are moms. actually to give credit to my maid she did send her daughters and sons to school. but none of them was interested. obviously there was too much distraction and lack of encouragement from their peers. my maid and her husband were not educated enough to guide them. my maid being a poor woman didnt want to waste money on something which wouldnt give her results. one of her daughter did manage to complete her school after marriage! so things are changing and even uneducated and poor ppl are not so conservative now.
btw there was a survey conducted sometime back and it was found that 50% of adult women were married off before 18. check this link:
http://specials.rediff.com/news/2009/apr/01sld1-underage-marriages-still-rampant-in-india.htm

diatoms82

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diatoms82

Joined: 16 October 2009

Posts: 118

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 10:56pm | IP Logged
In my home itself i have one, it's my maternal grandmother, who was married off at the age of 9 and sent to her in-laws place at the age of 11 and had her first child at 13. But later on she made sure that her daughters get the education and got married after 18.
 
So, i used to think that those times were different and at least now nobody (atleast in my social circle) think of marrying their girls at such an age, but i was wrong, as recently i came across a 13 year old girl from Gorakhpur (UP) recently who was married off at the age of 11 and delievered a child under critical condition at the age of around 12 & half and facing all kinds of problems while dealing with in- laws and taking care of baby. It was not that she belonged to a lower class poor family. She is from a upper caste well off family.To top it all, it was her brother, who,  incidentally has a master's degree in Social sciences, was the most supportive of the marriage. It was not a one off case in their family, rather a rule to get their daughter married before 14 otherwise, they are considered too old to get a suitable groom.
 
Seeing this, what can u say of those poor, uneducated people in villages who support child marriage? Absolutely nothing because u feel so disgusted helpless that a person having his education in a city is supporting evils like that so how u r going to explain those people?
 
It's rather ironical that they follow BV religiously, and feel sad at Anandi, Sugna & Phooli's plight. That's something that makes me wonder if a show or a seminar or anything like that can change society's perspective?
 


Edited by diatoms82 - 26 October 2009 at 11:00pm

RockChicGirl

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RockChicGirl

Joined: 04 October 2004

Posts: 44133

Posted: 26 October 2009 at 11:34pm | IP Logged
yes movies and shows have known to change the society's perspective. thats why there is so much censorship on movies/tv content. but BV though claims to make a statement against child marriage ends up promoting it thru the happenings in the show. so how will it discourage child marriage when the real motive entertainment resulting in trps and resulting in money...

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prachi_poorvi

FAMS

Senior Member

FAMS

Joined: 09 August 2009

Posts: 786

Posted: 27 October 2009 at 1:49am | IP Logged
Hey nice topic,
 
my mother is a Balika Vadhu, she was maaried before she turned 13 and my parents have been staying togehter since than. Yes my Grand mom was very fond of my mother so not much problem from her, but my aunts have troubled my mother till all of them got marreid. Now all of them are best feinds kind off.

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