* Need Advice? We've GOT it! * (Page 3)

roshnirj

Senior Member

Joined: 23 April 2009

Posts: 649

Posted: 14 April 2010 at 5:34am | IP Logged

i'm torn....distressed....my parents have been transferred back to our hometown....whereas all my friends and my dearest best friend and all my life is where i'm living....i can't....i donno how to even live without talking to her even for a day....i'm the type who gets depressed very soon....i don't even know how to talk to new ppl....she was my support system....without her in my life...i won't be able to stay away from the knife for long....i know u'll say 'be brave'...'try to move on'...'find new friends'...etc etc....but I JUST CAN'T OK??????? what to do?????

jesss.

IF-Sizzlerz

-

Joined: 25 October 2009

Posts: 23118

Posted: 26 May 2010 at 7:07am | IP Logged

hi

I have exams tomorrow but I cant get off india forums

what shall i do???

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MegaAngelzs,

sweetrose20

Newbie

Joined: 06 November 2010

Posts: 6

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 9:32am | IP Logged

hmmmm

sweetrose20

Newbie

Joined: 06 November 2010

Posts: 6

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 9:36am | IP Logged

I need your advice..

well , let me start by telling you my story. I fell in love with a guy a couple of years ago when I was in india.He was my friend's friend and i had only chatted to him online at that time,cuz he was living outside india. we were friends after a year i fell in love with him. He came down to india after a few months, however i couldnt meet him,but he had sent a gift for me to a neighbour(Guy) who i thought i could trust. however that Guys family created a big problem and at the end my parents came to know about my relationship and they freaked out. I was compeleting my schooling. They thought I stped talking to him after all the problems and decided to sent out for further education.I went to the place that he lived in to countinue my studies.After a few years i came india and i found out that the Guy had a huge crush on me and i wasnt bold enugh to tell him that i was still in love,cuz i knew he would go and tell my parents.Later Guy found out tht i was still in love with my boyfriend and so he went and told my parents that I was in love with both of them at the same time,which was a blunt lie . This caused them to give me a huge lecture on the society norms and family traditions. I really want to tell my parents that I have one boyfriend and that i have been with him for nearly 5years and I want to get married to him.But I dont know how to ??? SO ANY GOOD ADVICES???????

MegaAngelzs

Goldie

Joined: 07 July 2009

Posts: 1938

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 12:38pm | IP Logged

Originally posted by sweetrose20

I need your advice..

well , let me start by telling you my story. I fell in love with a guy a couple of years ago when I was in india.He was my friend's friend and i had only chatted to him online at that time,cuz he was living outside india. we were friends after a year i fell in love with him. He came down to india after a few months, however i couldnt meet him,but he had sent a gift for me to a neighbour(Guy) who i thought i could trust. however that Guys family created a big problem and at the end my parents came to know about my relationship and they freaked out. I was compeleting my schooling. They thought I stped talking to him after all the problems and decided to sent out for further education.I went to the place that he lived in to countinue my studies.After a few years i came india and i found out that the Guy had a huge crush on me and i wasnt bold enugh to tell him that i was still in love,cuz i knew he would go and tell my parents.Later Guy found out tht i was still in love with my boyfriend and so he went and told my parents that I was in love with both of them at the same time,which was a blunt lie . This caused them to give me a huge lecture on the society norms and family traditions. I really want to tell my parents that I have one boyfriend and that i have been with him for nearly 5years and I want to get married to him.But I dont know how to ??? SO ANY GOOD ADVICES???????

Oh wow. That seems like a huge problem !!
First of all. Congratulations, your in love!! Secondly, I think you should have never trusted that neighbour guy. It seems he has just a mere crush on you.
But even if it wasn't ... Guy wouldn't have gone and told your parents such an awful lie..
That would more or less scar you for the months to come.

Your parents are very traditional about family life and society and all that.
So i can understand why they are freaking out like that. Are they like a respectable family?
To the society? Maybe they're not used to all this stuff.

You should trust your heart completely. Because only your heart will tell you the truth that you most definitely need at this moment.
You HAVE to tell your Parents that your still in love with your boyfriend.
They will understand because they love you and only want your happiness...

It's better if you tell them now than later because it will only create more problems for you as well as your family.
Go to them and tell them "Mum, Dad. I know you only want my happiness. And you love me alot. But I would never do anything to hurt you or our family intentionally. Please don't get angry but I am in love with this guy." Tell your Parents that you can only be happy with him and no one else. If your happiness truly lies in your boyfriend. And you think you will be happy with him ... then tell your parents. Your parents will understand.
Otherwise, it will be too late.

And you will only jeopardise your own life AND love.

Hope this helps
-Amira-

sweetrose20

Newbie

Joined: 06 November 2010

Posts: 6

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 1:13pm | IP Logged

Thanks amira... for understanding me.!!!

there a few more issues..

1.They hate my byf's name or even saying i hv a byf.

2 .My family...is highly educated and have a high stand in the society and expect alot from me being the eldest ! the standard of education and career option for me and my byf is soo diffrent. Lets say if im hoping to be CA/accountant my byf is aiming to be nurse or might drop out, cuz of the amout of jobs he does in one day,.. to help out paying bills at home,renovating the house...I dont think my parents will handle it...

IM REALLY SCared..if they ask about his background

3.To make things worse they are coming down to settel down where im studying.

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MegaAngelzs,

MegaAngelzs

Goldie

Joined: 07 July 2009

Posts: 1938

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 1:38pm | IP Logged

Originally posted by sweetrose20

Thanks amira... for understanding me.!!!

there a few more issues..

1.They hate my byf's name or even saying i hv a byf.

2 .My family...is highly educated and have a high stand in the society and expect alot from me being the eldest ! the standard of education and career option for me and my byf is soo diffrent. Lets say if im hoping to be CA/accountant my byf is aiming to be nurse or might drop out, cuz of the amout of jobs he does in one day,.. to help out paying bills at home,renovating the house...I dont think my parents will handle it...

IM REALLY SCared..if they ask about his background

3.To make things worse they are coming down to settel down where im studying.

You must be so confused and tired.
And tired of being confused and tired !!

Your parents expect alot from you,.. just from one girl.
And why do they hate your bf's name? Isn't that a bit .. you know, over the top?

Or is it just that they don't want you to have a bf.. so they blame your bf for making you his gf.. and that's why they hate everything about him and those things related to him?

Just don't worry about his background for now.
All you need to think about is getting your Parents to understand your feelings and emotions towards them and your love. There's no point in hiding inside your cocoon and do whatever your parents say, even if it is against your desires and dreams.

I mean. I know this is hard for you.. you have to do all that good daughter kinda thing.
And listen to your parents.. but what good is it to have Parents .. if you can't tell them your
"Dill Ki Baat." What you want for your own self!!??

You and your Parents relationship should be like second nature.
You can go to them with all your problems and they sort it out for you,

And if they do ask for his background.. then tell them the truth.
Because relationships don't start with lies. They start with the truth!!

Soo .. get out from your cocoon and tell them.
Spring from your cocoon like a new born butterfly ... Sorry.
I'm in the motivational mood.

-Amira-

Edited by Maz_4_life - 08 November 2010 at 1:38pm

beautifuldreams

IF-Dazzler

Joined: 22 May 2009

Posts: 3576

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 2:25pm | IP Logged

MY life sucks

the guy i like

likes someone else :(

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MegaAngelzs, .Selena-Lauren.,

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Page 3 of 4

Posted: 14 April 2010 at 5:34am | IP Logged

Posted: 26 May 2010 at 7:07am | IP Logged

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 9:32am | IP Logged

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 9:36am | IP Logged

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 12:38pm | IP Logged

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 1:13pm | IP Logged

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 1:38pm | IP Logged

Posted: 08 November 2010 at 2:25pm | IP Logged

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