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Interracial Marriage (Page 5)

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return_to_hades

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return_to_hades

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:04pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by mahikhan

Originally posted by return_to_hades

Originally posted by mahikhan

Originally posted by Meena1

Funny.. We were just discussing the Louisiana case in my class yesterday..LOLLOL..the justice needs to be removed.. Ermm

Inter-racial marriage is still a taboo in my famiily.. i dont think my mom would ever be able to accept me if I ever marry a black guy.. LOLLOLLOL
LOL no mum would ever agree to let her daughter marry a black guy no matter what...i can bear a person with ok looks BUT black no wayEmbarrassedOuch

 
What if the black man is a really good man. A well settled caring family type of man.

And I mean who would say no to Will Smith, Denzel Washington?
Well thats what i mentioned earlier that my kid is too young for me to imagine such situation BUT yes if a black person happen to be a well settled person then why not.


I think all parents really want is the very best for their kids. Parents typically want same caste, religion, nationality etc because they think such similarities will make marriage easier. Similarity in cultural background makes it easier to respect where each other comes from and less compromises.

May desis indeed do have a negative perspective of black people due to the troubles in Africa, as well as the ghetto image of blacks in USA. They are more willing to accept whites, Asians etc into the family before blacks. Some Hispanics also fall in the iffy category because of the negativity associated with illegal immigrants and gang/mafia images.

However, I think if the person is genuinely a good person who would seem capable to be a good husband/wife many parents tend to begrudgingly give in. In the Caribbean there is a lot of interracial marriage between blacks and Indians. 

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:27pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by PhoeniXof_Hades

Originally posted by mahikhan

Firstly i'm never against my daughter liking anyone since it's their life they should be given right to choose their life partner so if she'll have no problem then i wont oppose either but she is too young for me to think how exactly i'd react at that time.



Why, then, did you say that no mother will ever permit her daughter on marrying a full Black, when you yourself feel you can (as a mother) agree with your daughter's choice for a husband?
I said it but that was in a different context.
I only second Meena to what she sais since i feel the same being a mum.

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:33pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by PhoeniXof_Hades

Originally posted by souro

Most people from the sub-continent don't like the looks of black people, not even Will Smith or Denzel Washington. Moreover, they're viewed more as an unciviized group, maybe because the Africans are always engaged in some bloody civil war or are dying of famine and the well off blacks act strange in some really outlandish clothes.
Obviously most moms won't want to see such a SIL.



You missed my point. I haven't asked for a reason as to why most mothers would not like to have a Black man as a son-in-law. My question was to Mahi, who previously stated thart it is literally impossible for any mother to permit her daughter in getting married with a Black guy, and on the next post, she stated she wouldn't mind it even in the least as to who her daughter chooses for marriage. I was a little confused, as the two statements are not just contradictory, but polar-opposite.

If NO mother can ever agree with her daughter marrying a Black, then suffice it to say Mahi can never be a mother.Wink (Oh lord, I can see a thousand spears coming my wayLOL).
Or else, the assumption that NO mothers will ever agree with her daughter marrying a Black men is faulty.

Being rare does not mean being nonexistent.
Oh so you started again?Embarrassed
Yes i did stated my point and that was in reaction to Meena's post i said i would never ever let my kid marry a black guy since i'm scared of such people i guess she stays in the USA and she was talking about black people in the USA so whether such black exist in UK or USA no desi mother would let her kids marry them even if they are Muslims i'd only not mind if my kid would choose someone from subcontinent and looks come later if a person is nice and caring INCASE he would be from INDIA or PAKISTAN.

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:40pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by return_to_hades



I think all parents really want is the very best for their kids. Parents typically want same caste, religion, nationality etc because they think such similarities will make marriage easier. Similarity in cultural background makes it easier to respect where each other comes from and less compromises.

May desis indeed do have a negative perspective of black people due to the troubles in Africa, as well as the ghetto image of blacks in USA. They are more willing to accept whites, Asians etc into the family before blacks. Some Hispanics also fall in the iffy category because of the negativity associated with illegal immigrants and gang/mafia images.

However, I think if the person is genuinely a good person who would seem capable to be a good husband/wife many parents tend to begrudgingly give in. In the Caribbean there is a lot of interracial marriage between blacks and Indians. 
Oh yes it is so.
LOL i'm actually tired of marraige b/w people from different cultures/raices i dont have any issue with cast though, and i'd want my kid marry someone from her dad's culture i'm a mixture of pak-ind its pretty difficult for me to choose things b/w my mum's ind and dad's paki culture.
I think the same BUT my preference would be some desi nri not someone from UK (english man).
 
 

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:51pm | IP Logged
Whatever you people disucssssss......remember the fact....Men are men....WinkTongueBut I believe If two people want to live together, they dont need any permission from any priest or any government. They need the permission of their hearts. And the day they feel that the time has come to part, again they don't need anybody's permission........
 
If man's love is free, there will not be blacks and whites, and there will not be these ugly discriminations, bcos love knows no boundaries......You can fall in love with a black man, you can fall in love with a white man or any color or caste or religion.....Love knows no religious scriptures.......I believe It knows only the heartbeat, and it knows it with absolute certainty...... Once love is free, it will prepare the ground for other fundamental rightsSmileKeep the love ....
 
Just chill.....with love n love only
 
Vinu's

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:55pm | IP Logged
^^Agreed one has no control on love you actually cann't help it. But one has few responsibilities to their family too.

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 1:06pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Believe

Whatever you people disucssssss......remember the fact....Men are men....WinkTongueBut I believe If two people want to live together, they dont need any permission from any priest or any government. They need the permission of their hearts. And the day they feel that the time has come to part, again they don't need anybody's permission........
 
If man's love is free, there will not be blacks and whites, and there will not be these ugly discriminations, bcos love knows no boundaries......You can fall in love with a black man, you can fall in love with a white man or any color or caste or religion.....Love knows no religious scriptures.......I believe It knows only the heartbeat, and it knows it with absolute certainty...... Once love is free, it will prepare the ground for other fundamental rightsSmileKeep the love ....
 
Just chill.....with love n love only
 
Vinu's
 
It's not always about 'love'. For someone to always go after what he/she wants, disregarding everything/everyone else, is selfish. If parents oppose a marriage, it should not happen because your parents brought you up, not your partner. Without your parents, you would not be what you are today. A person should marry according to their parents' wishes despite how they themselves feel, because they owe at least that much to their parents.

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Posted: 17 October 2009 at 1:16pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by return_to_hades

Originally posted by _LalithaJanaki_

 
You made some good points, and I applaud you for this well thought out replyClap, but I cannot agree with you. Sorry, just my opinion.Smile

My aim is to not make anyone agree with me. Marriage is a very personal choice and everyone has the right to marry people they deem suitable and influence their family to follow such choices. That's where I disagree. I do not believe marriage is a personal choice. Parents should have just as much of a say in your marriage as yourself, because if it wasn't for them, you wouldn't exist today. You owe them at least that much. Also, if you won't let your family 'influence' you, what right do you have to influence them whatsoever? Marriage always should be within ones comfort zone, or else it may not work. Comfort zones vary by people.  

But honestly - do you think you have a right to be against such a marriage if two people  of different backgrounds agree to such an alliance? Should a judge or anyone have the right to deny them their choice? Yeah, I have a right to be against such a marriage because it is my personal choice/oppinion, but I've already written before that I will never publicly condemn someone or "deny them their rights" if they choose to marry outside their culture. They will just not have my support. If you have a right to support such marriages, why don't I have the right to not support them? It is your opinion that supporting these marriages is being "liberal", but it's not a fact. If the parents support these marriages, then great for their kids, but if the parents do not, I will never support the kids. If being liberal means to go against your parents' opinion and outright disobey them, then I do not want to be liberal, because to obey a parent's order is the highest Dharm of every being.   

 
It's interesting though that you have a multi-cultural family. Must be fun at times as well, especially during the holidays of all the religions.Wink
Basically we are Hindus, but being Bombayites we say we just need an excuse to celebrate. Most of the different cultures are in extended family. I'm looking to my white cousins marriage next year to an Easter European girl.

Are your parents both Konkani Brahmins?

My dads side is Konkani Brahmin. My mom is Gujarati. I joke - I am half Hindu, Half GoodJew (Gujju) I was raised Konkani Brahmin.

With all that I am 100% heathen. Lol, no wonder we differ so much in our opinions.LOL

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