Joined: 29 May 2009
I don't know how all of this actually happened. As far as I remember, we all were having a great time at the party, like all friends together, like old times. All of a sudden, Sheena began blaming Gunjan for pushing her in the pool, and the next moment we know, Sammy met with an accident. I didn't know anything about the entire fiasco, until now.
"Dia, all this was RV's fault. Mayank and I went to look for clues, and we found out that RV had planned all of this against Samrat. We don't know what led him to do so, but he just did" Nupur had told me just a few minutes back.
And here I am, completely shattered, heartbroken, crying over my fate. I don't know what went wrong. I tried so hard for Sammy and RV to become friends, so that two of my favorite guys could be together. But then what exactly went wrong? Sammy had accepted RV's apology, so then what was the necessity to do all of this?
Nupur's words kept ringing in my ears. How could I be so blind? But why did RV do this? I thought he really loved me, then why? I thought he'd help Sammy get out of jail, and he had assured me that Sammy would be fine, then why? Was I so mean to people that I had to face all of this? Didn't I deserve to have true love too?
I slowly wiped away my tears, and tried to relax myself, but to no avail. A fresh set of tears began pouring out of my eyes. I sat down on my bed, and held on tightly to my teddy.
"I loved you so much RV, why did you do this to me?" I couldn't help but curse myself. If anyone was to be blamed, it was me. It was because of me that all of this happened. I had unknowingly hurt my best friend Sammy, and my cousin sister Gunjan. Dodo, Sammy, and so many others had warned me that RV wasn't the right person for me, but I always ignored them and trusted RV blindly.
He surely might be enjoying right now, with a bunch of his friends, probably laughing over my fate. He might be thinking what a fool I was to trust someone like him. He might be with other girls, and here I am, completely lonely. I have no one beside me. How was I supposed to face Sammy after whatever happened? What would I tell him?
And what about Gunjan? I had troubled her so much in the past, is that maybe why I was suffering now? But I had meant no harm to Gunjan, I just wanted my friend with me. Was that too much that I asked for? And now, when I could finally move over Sammy because of RV, he shattered me into pieces.
Suddenly the wounds seemed fresh. RV had always been against Sammy. He was the one who had called his gang to beat up Sammy. But he apologized to me that very day, and I could see some honesty in his eyes. I never really thought that he was such a brilliant actor. Maybe this was how it was all supposed to end.
I continued to cry, when my phone rang. It was RV. Now what more did he want? He had shattered me enough. There was nothing else left to be broken. I felt completely lifeless. I quietly pressed the ignore button. It rang again, but I didn't bother. I received a text from him, the very next minute. This is what it read.
Dia, I am so sorry for whatever I've done. I really do feel ashamed of myself. I don't know how or why, but I think I've fallen in love with you. Please forgive me this last time. Please Dia.
I cannot believe this. He still had the nerve to say that he loved me? Didn't I have enough of it already? I surely wasn't falling into his trap anymore. I just hate you RV, I hate you!
Just then, I heard the door knob turn. I slowly wiped away my tears, and looked at the door. It was Dodo. Why was he here, in my room? He came and sat down beside me.
"Deeds, please come and eat something. You seem pretty low ever since we've returned. Please come and eat something, or you'll end up falling sick." He said with a lot of concern in his voice. I just didn't think of anything, and I hugged him tightly.
"Oh Dodo, I always scolded you so much, taunted you so much, never really cared about you that much, but dodo, don't forget, I always will love you." I said, sobbing, wetting his shirt with my tears.
He patted my head gently. "I love you too deeds." He whispered softly.
Just then, Nupur and Gunjan entered. They knew what I was going through. They came and sat down on either side of me, and hugged me tightly. I felt like crying all the more.
"It's okay Dia, everything will be alright." Gunjan said, trying to console me. "Yeah Dia, you'll get someone much more deserving than that his lowness Rannvijay." Nupur said, trying to cheer me up by mimicking RV's style of saying 'his highness'.
I looked up at them, and they wiped away my tears for me. I smiled back at them. "I love you all so much." I told them. Honestly, it was now that I realized how lucky I was, to have such caring siblings. It made me feel that I wasn't a loner. It made me feel warm and comfortable. I couldn't believe I used to taunt them some time back, but I never really realized how important they were to me. They cared so much for me. They always made me feel that they're there for me, come what may.
I guess I could thank RV in a way, because he made me realize who all meant to me, and who all didn't. I realized how much I love my family, and how much I had ignored them in the past few months, but not anymore. I would start all over, and be a better sister to them, and would finally move on in life. Thank you RV, you helped me out in a way. If it weren't for you, I would have never realized the value of my family and friends.
Hope you guys liked it. Please do comment and press the like tab if u did.
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samrat climbed the window of gunjans room and found her sleeping in a siiting position with a book in her hand. He was mesmerized to see her innocent face. He went near her ear and whispered,
"happy birthday chashmish"
Gunjan got up with a start. She turned to look at samrat. she was stunned to see him. Though he always came by the window she never seemed to get used to the idea and was always surprised.
"samrat tum yahaan kya kar rahe ho?", gunjan said.
"happy birthday chashmish.", samrat replied.
"samrat tum jaao yahaan se koi aa jayega.", gunjan said looking in the direction of the door.
"chashmish tum yeh kya keh rahi ho? Main pehle bhi toh aa chukka hun naa?", samrta said.
"haan!! Par mere birthday par nahi. Samrat sirf di ko pata hain ke tum aise aate ho. Dia aur uday bhaiya ko nahi. Mera birthday hain and I'm sure ki who log yahaan aa hi rahe honge.", gunjan said.
Just then they heard someone coming to the room.
"samrat chup jaao. Jaldi. Bathroom mein.", gunjan said panicking and opening the nathroom door for him to enter.
"toh chashmish tumhe yaad hain ki bathroom mere chupne ke liye best jagah hain.", samrat said with a smile and entered the bathroom. Gunja closed the door behind him.
"happy birthday gunjan", nupur, uday and dia shouted coming into her room.
Gunjan though nervous about samrats presence smiled at her family.
All of them gave her their gifts.
"ab hume chalna chahiye. Bahut raat ho gayi hain. Doll tumhare liye humne kal party rakhi hain. Aur subah mujhe usski tayari bhi karni hain. So good night and sweet dreams.", saying this dia turned to leave but gunjan stopped her. dia turned around.
"dia yeh tumhare liye.", gunjan said handing a gift to dia.
"gunjan birthday mera nahi tumhara hain. Toh yeh gift?", dia asked.
"actually dia har saal main bauji aur di ko apne birthday par gift deti hun. aur phir tum log bhi toh meri family ho.", gunajn said.
"oh doll!! Thank you.", saying this dia opened her gift. It was a beautiful watch.
"main jaanti hun tumhaare paas isse kahi jyada achchi watches hongi par mujhe kuch samajh nahi aa raha tha..is liye…..", dia didn't let gunjan speak she hugged her just like nupur does.
"gunjan I love it. Tum sach mein bahut achchi sister ho.", dia said. Gunjan smiled at her.
"aur meri favourite sister mere liye kcuh nahi?", uday asked.
"yeh aapke liye uday bahiya.", gunjan said giving him his gift.
"ok ab hume chalna chahiye. Goodnight. Chalo dodo!!", saying this dia dragged dodo out of the room.
"aur mere liye?", nupur asked.
Gunjan handed her the gift. It looked like book though gift wrapped.
"kya gunjan tum bhi mayank ki tarah gift deti ho. Kitaab kyun?", nupur complained like a kid.
"di kholo toh.", gunjan requested.
Nupur opened her gift. It was photo album containing their photos together, the gangs photos, it even contained nupurs photos with mayank. Nupur had tears in her eyes.
"gunjan tu duniya ki best sister ahin.", nupur said hugging gunjan.
"nahi di. Tum duniya ki best sister ho. Main toh kabhi tumhaari baat thik se sunti bhi nahi. Ab aisa bilkul nahi hoga. Ab hum phirse best friends.", gunajn said.
"ahem ahem… apne di ko best friend banake mujhe sideline mat kar dena chashmish.", samrats aid enetering the room.
"samrat tum? Phirse khidki se? by god samrat!! kabhi kabaar toh darwaaze se aaya karo.", nupur said dramatically.
Samrat smiled and asked nupur, "kya main aapki priy behen ko apne saath le jaa sakta hun?"
"kahaan?", nupur and gunjan said at the same time.
Samarat looked at both of them amused and said, "chashmish ka birthday celebrate karne."
"samrat kal diya ne party rakhi hain. Tabhi celebrate kar lenge.", gunajn said.
"nahi chashmish. Tum kya mujhe ek mauka nahi dogi apne best friend ka birthday celebrate karne ke liye…samrat style.", samrat asked.
"haan gunjan. Tu jaa. Aur enjoy kar.", nupur said.
"par di…", gunajn started but nupur pushed her to the bathroom giving her clothes
After a while gunjan came out in the white salwar. Samrat was mesmerized to see her. she was wearing exactly the same dress he had imagined her wearing the night he had realized his love. He just couldn't take his eyes off her.
"chale?", gunjan asked softly.
Samart was lost in her beauty. Nupur nudged him and he got back to his senses.
"um.. haan chalo.", he said hastily.
They sat on his bike and samrat rode. Afterawhile he stopped they got down. Samrat had a black cloth in his eyes. He looked at gunjan and asked, "chasmish kya main tumhaari aankhen baandh sakta hun?"
Gunjan smiled and nodded her head.
Samrat tied the cloth on her eyes and held her by her shoulder in one arm and took her hand in his other. They both were getting affected by the proximity. Suddenly samrat stopped and removed his arm from around her shoulder though reluctantly.He slowly removed the cloth from her eyes to reveal a beautifully set table with cake in the middle.
Gunajn smiled at the sight. Samrat had kept it simple though very special. Samrat took her hand in his and walked near the table. He sang the birthday song and gunjan blew the candles. She cut the cake and was about to feed samrat when samrat caught her hand fed her instead. She then made him eat the remaining piece.
Samrat then bowed inront of her and asked, "may I have a dance with you?"
"samrat… music kahaan hian?", gunjan asked.
"chashmish hume music ki kya jarurat hain dance karne ke liye. Jab samrat aur gunjan saath ho toh silence mein bhi music sunaayi deta hain. But if it helps yeh waves ki awaaz hain naa.", samrat said.
Gunjan laughed and gave her hand in his and they danced. Both of them were lost in each other. The sound of lightening brought gunjan to her senses.
"samrat lagta hain baarish hone waali hain. Hume jaana chahiye.", gunjan said looking at samrat. samrat was still lost in her.
"samrat?", gunjan said again. Samrat came out of his reverie.
"um…kya tumne kuch kahaan?", samrat asked.
"haan…bearish hone waali hain. Hume ab jaan chahiye.", gunjna replied.
"yeah. You are right.", samrat said.
Gunjan turned to leave but samrat held her ahnd.
"chashmish apna gift toh le lo.", saying this he made gunjan turn to face him and placed a bracelet on the wrist he was holding. She looked at him.
"tumhaari bracelet kho gayi thi naa? Toh is liye…", samrat said.
'lekin yeh meri friendship ke liye nahi mere pyaar ke liye hain.' , samrat completed in his mind.
Gunjan smiled at him. She then took out the gift she had been hiding all along. She gave to samrat.
"chashmish yeh kya hain?", samrat asked.
"samrat main apni family ko hameshaa apne birthday par gift deti hun. tum bhi mere liye utne hi important ho jitni meri family hain. Is liye yeh gift tumhaare liye.", gunajn replied.
Samrat was speechless. He opened the gift to find a dancing couple.
"yeh…", samrat started.
"tumne mujhe dancing couple diya that oh maine socha ki main bhi tumhe dancing couple de deti hun.", gunajn replied with a smile.
"ab hume chalna chahiye", saying this she turned and started walking away.
Samrat was stunned by her gesture. He stood there holding the dancing couple in his hand. He suddenly said,
"I love you gunjan."
Gunajn stopped dead in her track. She didn't move. She was unable to. The silence that followed the three words was serene yet dreaded. calm yet turbulent.
"chashmish main tumse bahut pyaar akrta hun. main toh yeh bhi nahi jaanta kabse. Tum meri life mein who jagah rakhti ho jo koi aur nahi le sakta. Jab tum mere paas hoti ho toh mujhe lagta hain chahe koi bhi problem kyun na ho, hum jarur jitenge. Jab main tumhaare saath hota hun toh mujhe ek ajeeb sa sukoon milta hain. Tumhaari ankhon mien mere liye koi judgement nahin hain. Tum mujhe waise hi accept karti ho jaise mein hun. chashmish mujhe nahi pata tum mere liye aisa feel karti ho yaa nahi. Shayad nahi. its hard to wait around for something that you know might never happen but it even harder to give up especially when its everything you ever wanted. Main jaanta hun chashmish ke main tumhaare layak nhai par main puri koshish karunga tumhaare layak banne ki. Ab tumhaara jawaab job hi ho mujhe manjur ahin.", samrat concluded with tears in his eyes. He fell on his knees.
Gunjan turned around with tears in her eyes and looked at him. He looked so broken. Her heart ached to see him this way. She wlked up to him and made him get up. She made him look in to her eyes. He had tears in his eyes. She smiled at him and said, "samrat tum bahut bolte ho."
With this she flung into his arms and said, "I love you too samrat. I love you too. Main bhi nahi jaanti kabse…shayad hameshaa se. amine yeh sunne ke liye kitna wait kiya samrat. I love you."
Samrat was stunned. He was ecstatic. His chashmish loved him. He hugged her tightly never wanting to let go.
"I love you gunjan."
And it began raining. The sky was celebrating their love. It was indeed the sweetest birthday ever.
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It was a lovely evening, I thought to myself. Power was out. I was sitting by the window with a book in my hand. I could hardly focus on what I was reading. I was mesmerized by the world outside the window. "Will I ever get out?" I thought to myself. I sighed. I saw a pair of squirrels run and get on to our guava tree. They were sharing a guava fruit. A faint smile crept on my face. A cool breeze blew in caressing my face. I closed my eyes , fully enjoying it. The wind disturbed a few locks of my hair, which now dangle my face gently rubbing against my cheeks. I heard footsteps, my eyes turned towards the book. Dad just walked in with a smile on his face. "What's going on?" He asked, gently putting my hair behind my ear. "Hi daddy", I smiled. "Don't read in the dark. It will affect your eyes." He gently cautioned. "So, what are you reading?" Sitting in the sofa, showing me to sit beside him. I bookmarked the page and went and sat by his side, laid down putting my head in his lap. That was my favorite thing to do. He started to gently stroke my hair. I breathed in deeply to remember his perfume.
you sad Bulli?" He asked." No daddy, I am just thinking". "Well then, shoot" he
said with a broad smile on his face. "What makes you think I have
questions?" I was irritated that he
assumed I had something to ask. He laughed "Well, don't you?". "Umm, yes I do,
but I didn't like that you knew." I
said, rather childishly. "Daddy, Is being a girl a good thing or a bad
thing?" I asked, unsure how to ask the
question. There was a small frown on his fore head. "Why do you want to know,
Bulli? Did someone say something to
you?" he enquired. "Answer me, Daddy." I
insisted. "Let's see", he said. "I think
being a girl is a good thing because, you get to wear pretty clothes, everyone
thinks you are precious and if you cry correctly, you can get away with any
crime." I shot up from his lap. "That's what you think of ME?" I screeched. I
was angry, horrified and belittled.
"Well, what do you want me to say?" He was amused now. "Being a girl is
a wonderful thing." I declared. "Is that so? Care to share?" He said. "Well, I
am a girl and I can do everything that boys can do. I excel in sports; I am
topper in my class. I sing and I dance." I continued. "I can beat up any boy in
my class." I was confident now. "And you know what, On top of all that, all
that you said. So, I am good, awesome and one of a kind" Now I was very happy.
Dad looked at me gently "Yes talli", he said "that you are. You already know
this, never doubt yourself."
"Now why my angel had to wonder about her?" He insisted. "Well, sometimes I wonder daddy. Mamma always says that, I don't behave like a girl. Girls have to cook, clean and she had a big list of do's and don'ts for girls. Anna doesn't have any of that lists. She says for girls only." I pouted. Dad sighed. "Talli, you have to understand Mamma. She is my mother. She belongs to an older generation where woman took care of household and had almost always raised the kids single handedly because men were struggling to feed their families. You see, women by nature are great managers. They can guide while working hard and setting example by actions. They are great at multi-tasking. They can love and discipline at the same time. Women have achieved a lot more philosophically and spiritually than most men." He explained. "Daddy , You love your Mom very much don't you?" he tapped on my head gently and said "Yes talli. She worked very hard to bring us up. You see, I lost my dad when I was 6yrs old. And she was all alone with my grandfather who was old. But, she managed to send us to school and gave us the security and comfort we needed." I suddenly grew great respect for my grandma.
Something was still not clear in my head. "Daddy, do you think Amma is less
than you?" I asked hesitantly "Because
sometimes you get upset with her. Amma
doesn't say anything. She smiles and goes inside and gets you coffee." I put my
powers of observation to good use. Dad was a bit surprised and a bit taken
aback. He ran his fingers quickly through his hair. "Well that's because she
knows me very well and she knows sometimes I bring the office pressure home. She can sense it right away. She also knows
how to calm me down." He smiled. He continued "she takes care of both my angels
and my mother. And she does this with great enthusiasm and a beautiful smile on
her face." His smile now broadened. "You love Amma very much too. Don't you
daddy?" I asked. Daddy started laughing loudly and said "Yes, I do" he said.
"Since your interrogation is done now, can we talk about the book you are
reading?" I smiled. "Oh! You mean
Chandamama. Nothing much. A story about
a princess and a prince." I answered. Power came back. Amma was calling "Nupur,
come to dinner." "Chalo" said Daddy. I was still pondering about what my dad
said, how much he respected the women in his life, how much they influenced
him, how they became a support for him and how wonderfully he explained that to
me. "Daddy!" I said rather quickly, "When
I grow up I want to marry someone just like you." I proclaimed.
Now, Daddy was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes. I
became shy and hid my face on his chest. "Bangaru talli, I will absolutely look
for a boy like that when you grow up. May be bit better, you know who is also a
prince. Now can we go to dinner?" I
still hid my face and nodded yes. He picked me up and carried me to dining
room. My head lying on his shoulder, I hugged him around his neck. I felt very
peaceful and happy knowing that my dad loves me very much. I became very
confident of myself and hopeful that I will find my future partner who would
respect me and love me just like my daddy. We had dinner and daddy put me to
bed. "Now close your eyes." He said. I did. He was lying by my side and I loved
the warmth of my dad. I tried to fall asleep. Thoughts were racing in my head.
Amma walked in "did she sleep?" asked Daddy. "I think so" he answered. "What
were you two talking about?" She asked, "Everything alright?" She had a concern in her voice. I heard Daddy
chuckle. "She is only 6 years old, but the things she talks about, amaze me.
She is going to be a challenge. I think I am going to love talking to her. She
is such a dreamer and thinker. I love her spirit and frankness. She is not
afraid of taking life by its horns. God help the boy who will end up marrying
her." (Although I wondered what it meant) I didn't hear Amma say anything. I
know Amma, she must have shook her head sideways, disapproving. I fell asleep
and dreamt about all the wonderful things in the world. And by the way, it
included my future prince charming, very little did I know that future can't be
only dreamt, but has to be built. Then again that's for another day.
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MN one shot -
Mayank-Nupur's first anniversary-
"today one year back we both confessed our feelings to each other in front of a hall full of people. Then smiling and correcting herself ' people, what people??? I didn't see any. All I could see was his eyes which looked straight through my heart, all I could think of was his feelings for me which he was trying to hide, all I wanted to hear was his voice and all I could feel was his presence.
Then his lips moved to say what I was dying to hear''
"main tumse pyar karta hun."
"That moment was the best moment of my life. That feeling was the best feeling I could ever get. Those were the most beautiful words in the world for me."
Startled by some noise nupur comes back to reality and looks at her watch.
"I knew he would forget our anniversary as today is also our last day of exam." Continuing to complain, "I asked him to come one hour early but how can he'.exams and books are his first love afterall."
Making a sad face she looks at the door. Mayank has not come yet. She puts her hands on the table and rests her head down. Before she knew she was asleep. She studied all night as she knew how important scoring well in exams is to mayank.
Mayank enters wearing a shirt nupur gifted him. He walks close to her and sees her sleeping like a baby. Knowing that she must have worked hard just for him as studying is not one of her favorite things to do, he looks at her lovingly and thinks-
"poori raat padi hogi isliye so gayi"
Then in a whispering tone not to wake her up ' he says
"Every day you make me fall in love with u all over again. Happy anniversary" he smiles.
He sits right next to her looking at her face, admiring her beauty and simplicity. He notices that she is wearing a white suit and is looking exactly the way he likes her. He slowly moves the hair strand on her cheek behind her ear and remembers the time when she got drunk and they spent the night at a barn.
Thinking to himself-
" I can't believe there was a time I hated her. I didn't wanted her around me. But that one moment in the barn changed my life and my feelings for her. I realised how innocent and real she was, I was amazed by her zest for life, how she would find something interesting in even worst of situations, I admired her simplicity and even found her drunk drama to be very cute (smiling) Suddenly, I was admiring her for everything that I had been ignoring in the past. There was something magical about her. I didn't know what was right or wrong but the moment she looked at me and smiled with her hand in mine, I knew she was the one and I was falling for her!!!!"
He then brings himself back from his most cherished memories and slips a letter with a red rose in nupur's bag. He looks at his watch. Only 10 min. left before students will start coming in. He very slowly and gently touches her face and then runs his fingers through her hair in an attempt to wake her up. Nupur opens her eyes and sees mayank. She is delighted but then suddenly gets angry remembering that he came late.
N ' tumhe maine jaldi bulaya tha na aaj tum late kyon aaye???
M ' I'm sorry main bhool gaya tha'.kyon koi doubt tha kya kisi topic mein. Batao main abhi clear kar deta hun ( acting all innocent as if he doesn't remember their anniversary)
N ' (very angry now) nahi koi doubt nahi hai'.aur jo the who bhi khatam ho gaye.
M ' theek hai fir chalo apni seat par baitho exam shuru hone mein bas kuch hi time hai.
N ' (muttering to herself) I can't believe mujhe is rukhe sukhe insaan se pyar hua. Nupur tu bhi na registan(desert) mein paani dhoondegi to yahi hoga na'hamari anniversary bhool gaya.
M ' (all this while smiling to himself) all the best nupur!
N ' (fully irritated now thinking to herself) exam ke liye ya tumhe pyar karne ke liye??
But nupur controls her anger and gives him a half smile.
Exam begins. Nupur looks at mayank couple of times but he is busy doing his paper. Then she forgets everything and tries to concentrate on her exam.
Finally the bell rings and papers are collected. Nupur feeling very upset walks out of the classroom without even talking to mayank. She goes to the loo to get away from him.
N - "Donkey, idiot, pata nahi khud ko kya samajhta hai, pyar nibhana nahi aata to log pyar karte kyon hai, rehta apni books ke saath hi''"
Suddenly a tear rolls down her cheek so she opens her bag for a tissue. She sees the letter and red rose in there. She is shocked!!
"He remembered" she says and a huge smile comes on her face.
She opens the letter. It read'.
I know ab tak tum mujhe 1000 galiyan de chuki hogi, par tum bhool gayi ki tumse related koi bhi baat main kabhi nahi bhoolta. You mean the world to me. Par haan tumhe itni der tak tang karne ke liye I'm really sorry'
Aaj hamari anniversary hai''aur bahot saare surprises tumhara wait kar rahe hain.
Ab gussa bhool jao aur jo smile letter dekhte hi tumhare chehre par aayi thi use le kar aa jao main is girls loo ke door ke bahar tumhara intezar kar raha hun. Jaldi aao please it's very embarassing for me to be standing here.
I love you nupur!!!!!
Nupur picks up the bag and quickly runs outside of the loo. She sees mayank standing right there smiling. Caring about no one around she hugs him tightly..
N - "I love you mayank"
Mayank hugs her back ' " I love you too nupur"
After few sec. realising where they are they break the hug.
N ' ( with tears in her eyes) kya kahoon tumse mayank??
M ' ek min. ek min. kya kahoon?? Nupur pooch rahi hai kya kahoon?? By godd nupur aaj kya hua , tumhe to hamesha pata hota hai kya kehna hai'.
N ' tang mat karo mayank aaj ke liye already kafi kar chuke ho'aur tumhe kaise pata main yahin aaongi tumse naraz hoke'
M ' ab poore ek saal se tumhare saath hun'..tumhari fav. hideout place jaanta hun.
N ' aur mere surprises!!!!!!!! ( all excited)
M ' koi surprises nahi hain woh to maine tumhe bahar jaldi nikalne ke liye likh diya tha. Ghar chalo tv par ek documentary aane waali hai hitler pe woh dekhenge!
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The phone was ringing. I ran to receive the call.
"hello?", I asked. there was no reply. "helloooo?", I asked again.
After a while someone answered. "hello!!", the voice sounded familiar.
"whoz this?", I asked.
"mayank.", came the reply. I had to stop myself from dropping the receiver.
"oh….um…I'll call samrat.", I said and called samrat. I still had the receiver pressed tightly against my ear. He wasn't saying anything and nor was i. when samrat came I gave him the receiver and went to my room closing the door behind me.
It had been 5 years since I had heard his voice. Whom you may ask. Mayank…mayank sharma, an old friend. Haa!!! Friend!!! He was one person who irritated me the most even though I hadn't seen him in these 5 years.
We had been in the same class from 3rd std to 7th. He was my brothers best friend(he still is) and we were part of the same group. In 8th we got separated in different classes. Samrat and mayank were in the same class and me in a different class. Though both of us had taken French and so we met each other for those two lectures everyday. Our Few other friends had also taken French and so we used to have a lot of fun. Teasing, pranking, laughing was our routine. He used to tease me with one of our friends and I used to go "yah right!!". The smile that he used to give me after that was something I can never forget. We weren't best friends but still were good friends.
Then the last day of school came, our farewell party. I bid all my friends good-bye although I didn't find mayank anywhere. After the party I was walking with my friends when one of my friend stopped to talk to someone. I stood with them and looked around. I saw mayank standing with samrat looking at me. I smiled at him. He walked up to me suddenly and said, "so, not even a good-bye." I don't know whether it was a question or a remark. I saw pain in his eyes for some reason and also something else which I haven't been able to understand till date. I smiled at him and said, "bye mayank. All the best." He looked at me for a moment and then replied, "all the best to you too. Bye.", he said and we parted our ways. Little did I know that the goodbye was for-ever. That was the last time I saw mayank sharma.
After a few months, samart told me that mayank had moved to delhi since his father was transferred there and he wont ever be coming back to Mumbai. Something stung me then. I felt something falling inside me, leaving me. That night I cried my heart out.i don't know why I was reacting this way. I felt helpless, hopeless. I wanted to call him but didn't have the guts to do that. That day I felt that mayank was not just a friend to me but something more…far more than that. The idea of not seeing him again was impossible to accept.
Days, months and years passed. I didn't hear from him again. That last conversation is still fresh in my mind as if it happened yesterday. I usually see him online chatting with our mutual friends. But never have I tried to talk to him. Nor has he tried to contact me anytime. On my birthday my entire friends list wished me except for him. I usually hear samrat talking about him, even some of our mutual friends but I've learnt to ignore it now or so I tell myself. I have turned sour about him. He is not my friend anymore. I have tried to convince myself that I never really liked him. It was just attachment for a friend that made me upset about him leaving. I resent him now bcoz he had not even bothered to inform me that he was leaving.
But I still am not able to explain to my heart as to why I still remember every single feature of his face, his laugh, his remarks. Why does my heart skip a beat when I hear his name? why do I keep expecting him to drop in to say hi someday. Why does him not contacting me bothered me so much that I've started resenting one of my oldest friends? Why is my heart still beating so fast even after the call is over? He is not in my present, then why is he still present in me?
I don't have the answers for these questions or perhaps I do and just don't want to accept it. I know he was the only boy I ever loved but it is difficult to accept that my first love was left incomplete.
The phone was ringing.
"hello?" , said a voice on the other side. I went numb on hearing that voice. It was familiar….way too familiar. I didn't answer.
"hellloooo?", she asked again.
I couldn't utter a word for a while but then somehow I managed to say, "hello"
"whoz this?", she asked.
"mayank", I replied.
"oh…..um …I'll call samart.", she said and called out samrats name loudly. I pressed my ears to the receiver. The silence was awkward. I was hearing her slow breathing, it was a proof that she was there, still there, on the other side of the phone. I suddenly felt very close to her. samart then took the phone and we started talking.
I usually never called samrat on his landline. But today his cell was coming unreachable and I had to dial his landline number. She had recievd the call. It was first time in 5 years I was hearing her voice. Whom you may ask…nupur…..nupur bhushan, my best friends sister and one of my oldest friends. Hearing her voice again brought back all her memories. Ha!! As if I was able to forget her for a moment. I have been trying to stop thinking about her but cant.
I remember when we used to be in the French class together. We used to have so much fun. I would tease her with one of my friends and she would go, "yah right!!!" I used to just love the way she said that. Many a times we ganged up against samrat. we weren't best of friends but were good friends nevertheless.
I remember our last conversation. It was on the farewell day. She was walking with her friends after the party. One of her friends stopped to talk to someone and she stood there looking here and there. She suddenly caught my eyes and smiled at me. I can never forget that smile. It wasn't like it was beautiful or something. It was beautiful alright but I remember it more bcoz of the pain it caused me. I felt it was a formality she was doing. She had bid all her friends good-bye except for me. The thought that I wasn't even worth her good-bye hurt me beyond words. That smile gave me courage to confront her.
"so not even a goodbye.", I said. I was angry and hurt. she looked at me for a while and said, "bye mayank and all the best."
"all the best to you too and bye.", I said. After that we went our own ways.
I was supposed to leave for delhi as my dad was getting a transfer. Samart knew about it and I secretly hoped that he would tell nupur about it. I wanted her to call me at least one time. I didn't tell her bcoz I had still not gotten over her formal goodbye during the farewell. She didn't call nor did I call her. my stupid ego didn't allow me to do so. if she didn't bother about me leaving then why shud I bother to tell her, I had thought at that time.
That was one of the biggest mistakes of my life. If I had told her, maybe there wud have been a chance that we cud stay in contact. But by not telling her I had snapped the only chance of staying in contact with her. samart talks about her sometimes. I see her online many a times. But don't dare to drop a hi. What if she doesn't want to talk to me? What if she has forgotten me? I know I wont ever be able to take that. It was hard to leave everything behind back then and the fact that I didn't inform her still haunts me. I usually go online just to see her icon on my friends list. I feel some strange happiness seeing her online at the same time as me. Crazy you might say but that's how it is.
Today hearing her voice, I realized once again what I have lost. I have lost the only girl that affected me in a way no-one ever did. the only girl I cud be myself with. The only girl that made my heart beat faster. The only girl I ever loved. But now all that is left is this bitter-sweet longing
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Joined: 21 May 2006
hi, all.......this is my first attempt at any sort of writing...........so please feel free to criticise............but i cudnt help writing, this idea struck me this morning...............so here it goes...........you can think of it as continuation from yesterday's epi
Nupur lay awake in her bed..............sleep was far far away from her eyes.......she was confused, about Mayank and her relationship. Her heart was asking her to forgive him, pulling her towards him......after all he came all the way to Morena for her.leaving his studies,and everything, but her mind protested......telling her that Mayank has never trusted her, be in project issue or this.........now he is guilty, but it will back to square one once she forgives him....she tossed and turned thinking all this, when she heard some noise outside.
She got up and went out to see Chinky getting ready.......surprised she asked.......Chinky, itni subah kya kar rahi hai?
Chinky - Wo didi, aaj Karvachauth hai na, to sargi khani hai.....
Nupur - Karvachauth?
Just then Bui enters calling Chinky.......and she Nupur.........
Bui - Are Nupur, acha hua tu uth gayi, main tujhe jagane hi wali thi..........aaj karvachauth hai, aur tujhe bhi vrath karna hai, bablu ke liye.......
Nupur was startlked hearing this........she wanted to fast, but for her Mayank, and nobody else...........she replied - Bui, maine abhi kuch decide nahi kiya hai, mujhe nahi krna vrath.......
Bui - Nupur?
Nupur - Bui please, is baat ke liye mujhe force mat karo........
Bui - jaise teri marzi.........ab tu badi ho gayi hai.........
Nupur just leaves from there..seh comes back to her room, and quickly got ready, and slyly went down........in the dining room, Chinky was having her Sargi, and Bui was telling her about Karvachauth and its importance...... the more she listened, the more stronger her resolve got to keep fast for Mayank..........
As soon as Bui and Chinky left, she quickly went there, and picked up the plate............she ran to the terrace, and ate her Sargi........after that she went to the temple, to pray for Mayank and their relationship.
By the time she came back, everyone was up, and having breakfast.......... her eyes went to Mayank.........
Mayank's eyes lit up the moment he saw Nupur..........he was looking for her since the time he got up........she looked beautiful.............she always did, but today was something special about her, he decided.........Uncomfortable by his intense gaze Nupur moved away from there...........
Suddenly Diya asked Chinky, why she isnt eating.......
Chinky - Diya di, aaj karvachauth hai na........
Uday - Karvachauth? ye kya hota hai?
Gunjan - Uday bhaiya, karvachauth pe girls apne life partner ki long life ke liye fastkari hai.
Uday - Wow, iska matlab agar mein shadi kar loon, to main amar ho jaunga.........
Diya - Shut up dodo..........btw, Nupur kahan hai?
Gunjan - Main dekh ke aati hun.....
Chinky - di, aap baitho, main bula ke lati hun......
Chinky calls Nupur, who comes there, avoiding Mayank's gaze..........
Uday - Nupur, tumhe breakfast nahin karna............ye village ki dishes are very tasty...
Nupur ( keeping her head down) - Nahin mera mann nahin hai........
Diya ( smiling ) - mann nahi hai, ya phir tumne bhi karvachauth ka vrath rakha hai, kisi ki long life ke liye.....indication towards mayank......
Nupur immediately lloked up, tensed on being caught.......and shouted....... " mujhe kisi ke liye bhi vrath rakhne ki koi icha nahi hai...... samjhe tum log"..and runs away from there.........
Mayank was very hurt, and angry at himself..........he gets up, takes his plate and move towards Nupur's room.........
Here, she was still recovering from her outburst......she is torn between her heart and mind..........and irritated with everything around.......when she sees Mayank entering her room........
Nupur ( angrily) - tum yahan kyun aaye ho? muje koi baat nahin sunni........
Mayank ( with regret in his voice) -Nupur please mera gussa khane par mat nikalo, ye lo khalo........
Nupur - Tumhe samjh nahin aati kya, mukje nahin khana..........mera mann nahin hai............aur tumhari vajah se to main kabhi khana nahin chodungi, samjhe Mayank Sharma........... and with this she leaves the room, leaving Mayank alone to feel her pain and anger.........
The day went by...........everyone was busy with their work, and nobody noticed the two disturbed souls...........
Mayank was in his room...........he was angry at himself............every bitter word he told Nupur kept playing in his mind again and again, making him more and more guilty..........he had always taken pride in being control of himself, and hatedhimself for loosing control with the one person he loved from the bottom of his heart...........he was thinking, " What did i do? Maine apne saare promises tod diye, phir main kaise expect karun ki Nupur mujhe maaf kar degi?.........usne meri wajah se subah se kuch nahi khaya..........lunch par bhi nahi aayi.........kya karun, kuch samajh nahi aa raha hai? ", and suddenly an idea struck him, he smiled and he quickly left the room.
On the other hand, Nupur was fuming in her room, she was hungry, and besides she hasnt seen Mayank after their argument in the morning, she started speaking to herself " Kya zaroorat thi tujhe Nupur Bhushan, us monkey Mayank ke liye vrath rakhne ki.........wo tujhe itna hurt karta hai aur tu.......pagal hai tu, bilkul pagal......kal to pure din, sorry sorry kar ke aage piche ghum raha tha, aur aaj subah se pata nahi kahan chup ke baitha hai......main jaanti thi wo sadu hai hi aisa..........ek din sorry aur doosre din phir wahi..........tujhe bhi Nupur puri duniya main Mayank hi mila tha pyar karne ke liye............"
Suddenly she hears gunjan's voice " Chinky, chaad nikal gaya, jaldi aa"
She moves toward the terrace, where everyone was watching Chinky breaking her fast.........her eyes searches for Mayank, but he was nowhere......
Meanwhile chinky does the aarti of mmon, and Uday asks - Chinky mujhe laga tune apne hone wale husband ke liye fast rakha hai, par tu to moon ki puja kar rahi ho?
Bui - are mubai mein kuch nahi sikha kya? Chand ki puja kar ke apne suhaag ki lambi umar ki prarthana kar rahi hai........
Uday- Suhag? acha Chinky ke pati ka naam Suhaag hai......
Bui (irritated) - Chup kar.....
Meanwhile Nupur is lost in her thoughts, she imagines Mayank helping her break her fast.........suddenly she feels a hand on her shoulder, she turns around to see Gunjan, smiling ather with a aarti thali in her hand..........
She looks, ather questioningly............Gunajn smiles " Di, tumhe kya lagta hai............agar tum mujhe nahi bataogi, to mujhe pata nahi chalega ki tumne subah se kuch kyun nahi khaya? "
Nupur looks down flustered....... Gunjan..........main........wo". she stammers......
Gunajn - "Di, kuch bolne ki zaroorat nahi hai............ye lo, maine tumhari pooja ki thali ready kar di hai..........tum pooja kar ke niche aa jao........hum sab jaa rahein hain....."
She gives the thali to Nupur and turns to go, but turns back and says......." aur haan Mayank ki photo bhi rakh di.........usko dekh lena........" winking.........
Nupur blushes, and looks down..............
Gunjan comes down to see Mayank entering the house, and ad idea strikes her......... "Mayank tum kahan the? Di, tumhe dhundh rahi thi"
Mayank - " mujhe kuch kaam tha....Nupur kahan hai?"
Gunajn - " Di, terrace pe hai, jao"
Mayank rushes towards the terrace...........he enters to see Nupur doing aarti of the moon.......he was confused, as to what she is doing.........as he watches, she slowly raises the sieve, and looks at moon through it.............and then lowers it to see Mayank's photo in her hands..........
Realization dawns on Mayank, that she kept fast for him.........he is happy, surprised, shocked all at the same time.
Recovering himself he calls out to her " jab main tumhare samne hun to photo dekhne ki kya zaroorat hai"
Nupur turns as she hears his voice........she is shockd to see him there...........and upset at being caught............but somewhere in her heart she was happy to see him......
He slowly moves towards her, and stands infront of her......and smiling he says " vaise maine tumhare DDLJ, mein dekha hai, ki ye fast tumhe mere hi haathon todna padega........."
Nupur ( not ready to give in) - Maine tumhare liye fast nahin rakha hai.....
Mayank ( holding out the photo in her hand) - Acha, par ye to meri hi photo hai........
Nupur was al loss of words........Mayank made her look up at him, and says........" Nupur, dekho please ab to khalo.....ye lo." and holds out to her Super Sweets ki Jalebi......... :)
Nupur looks up at him, smiling softly, happy that he remebered - ye?
Mayank - Tumhe pasand hai na.........to lo na.......and feeds her with his hand, he then makes her drink water.......
After that he cups her face in his hand, and says " nupur, main jaanta hun maine tumhe bahut hurt kiya hai....aur ek nahi kai baar.........main hamesha promise karat hun ki tumhari smile kahin jaane nahin dunga........tumhe hurt nain karunga..........but i end up giving u only tears....i think main tumhe deserve hi nahi karta.........."
Nupur looks up and says " nahin Mayank........."
Mayank interupts her........"Mujhe bolne do Nupur.........aisa nahin hai ki main tumse pyaar nahin karta, ya phir mujhe tumse sharam aati hai..........par haan apne pyar ko sab ke samne lana mujhe uncomfortable kar deta hai"
Nupur looks as he turns his back towards her.and continues " Nupur, tum jaanti ho na, main hamesha se hi akele raha hun......except for maa, agar maine kisi se bhi apni life share ki hai to wo tum ho, aur sirf yehi reason hai ki mujhe, sabseapni zindagi ki itni khaas baat share nahin karna chahta tha........."
" par mujhe tumhari baat bhi sunni chahiye thi..........i m really sorry nupur, please mujhe maaf kar do"
Nupur feels bad hearing all that.........she comes infront of him and holds his hand........and says " I m sorry Mayank, kimaine hamesha tumhe force kiya sabko batane ke liye, par main kya karti mujhe hamesha dar tha ki tum mujhe chodke chale jaoge.......tum itne perfect jo ho........"
Mayank holds her hand, and smilingly says " aur tum mere liye perfect ho........."
The both smile at each other, and Mayank pulls her in for a hug..........they hug each other for a long time, when Mayank remembers something, and pulls back......
he takes out that chain fro his pocket, and showas it to Nupur " ye tumhare liye, maa ne di thi"
Nupur is shocked " Aunty ne? matlab tumne unhe sab bata diya........."
Mayank smiles and says " haan , aur ye unka hi idea tha, tumhe yahan aake manae ka....chalo ab pehen lo..."
Nupur looks at him annoyed and says "uuf-ho Mayank tum bhi na............pehen lo matlab.........pehna do............" saying this she turns, and he slowly makes her wear the chain.
He turns her towarsd himself, and slowly kisses her forehead, and says " ab main tumhe kabhi bhi hurt nahin karunga, aur ye promise main kabhi nahi todunga"
She smiles, but next moment in her full nautanki mode says " aur toda na, to main tumhe tod dungi........."
They both laugh, and then she says " ab chalein, mujhe bahut bhookh lagi hai"........Mayank just nods.........and they move downstairs to have their dinner......
Later at night they both sit under the stars, with her head on his shoulder, and his hands around her waist............and talk......about their dreams, aspirations.......childhood.........everything........their bond getting stronger.......
Thats it guys................I know it has become too long, but please do comment............positive or negative anything will do..........thanx for reading.........
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