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Beyond the Dark Clouds - An AR one shot (Page 7)

guggu IF-Dazzler
guggu
guggu

Joined: 03 February 2009
Posts: 3869

Posted: 10 October 2009 at 4:32am | IP Logged
Amazing one shot Smriti...!! I loed it totally!! Amazing writer... to be honest I had this inkling feeling from the time I had started reading your comments on FFs in the forum, that you will make a great writer and i was right!
Brilliant!!

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

smriti.tweety

smriti.tweety Senior Member
smriti.tweety
smriti.tweety

Joined: 13 August 2006
Posts: 238

Posted: 10 October 2009 at 11:02am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Enigma_Swati

Amazing one shot Smriti...!! I loed it totally!! Amazing writer... to be honest I had this inkling feeling from the time I had started reading your comments on FFs in the forum, that you will make a great writer and i was right!
Brilliant!!



Thanks Swati!!!!! Incidentally it was Neeta who prompted me to pen something down after reading my comment on one of her one shots! :D Seems like you guys had more faith in me than I had in my own self! Thanks again for liking it! It gives me boost to be encouraged by my Fav writers on the forum! :)

Love
Smriti
-Armaan- Senior Member
-Armaan-
-Armaan-

Joined: 19 June 2009
Posts: 377

Posted: 12 October 2009 at 4:24am | IP Logged
Hey Smriti..!! I know um a bit late to comment... Sorry for that :((

First of all.. The Title seemed absolutely perfect. It could not have a better title for the synopsis, actually I just Loved it... Tons :))

So, now coming to the story... Reading Arman's POV as an alternative of Ridhima's was a stimulating change.. You wrote it down so beautifully..

I loved the story.. Great Stuff, and actually a flawless composition is what in which you could not find any mistake... after a good '7 minutes' of searching... Lol..

Anyways..Do inform me if you write other stuff..It would be a pleasure indeed.. to have some more stuff from you :D

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smriti.tweety

smriti.tweety Senior Member
smriti.tweety
smriti.tweety

Joined: 13 August 2006
Posts: 238

Posted: 12 October 2009 at 9:00am | IP Logged
Originally posted by -Armaan-

Hey Smriti..!! I know um a bit late to comment... Sorry for that :((

First of all.. The Title seemed absolutely perfect. It could not have a better title for the synopsis, actually I just Loved it... Tons :))

So, now coming to the story... Reading Arman's POV as an alternative of Ridhima's was a stimulating change.. You wrote it down so beautifully..

I loved the story.. Great Stuff, and actually a flawless composition is what in which you could not find any mistake... after a good '7 minutes' of searching... Lol..

Anyways..Do inform me if you write other stuff..It would be a pleasure indeed.. to have some more stuff from you :D


Hi Armaan! ( I am guessing thats your name! )

No worries about the late comment; I am glad you took out time to read my first attempt :D
I am happy you think the title is a perfect fit! All credit to NJ for coming up with a beautiful one!
Penning Armaan's POV was a spur of the moment decision and good to know you found it a nice change! :)
Lol! Thanks for looking out for the mistakes! It helps me better myself whenever I plan to write the next one.
Will definitely let you know when I come up with something new :D
Thanks again!

Soph Senior Member
Soph
Soph

Joined: 07 September 2009
Posts: 331

Posted: 28 October 2009 at 6:34am | IP Logged
Hiya SmritiSmile

Do forgive me, I cannot believe this one passed me. It was actually one of the best one shots, I have read till date.

You cleverly go into the problem without actually describing what happened in a lot of detail. And what I loved most!, is the way you accurately described their relationship. If I were Armaan, then I too at one point would have been able to feel the emptiness, of thinking that Riddhima would not come beside him, at a time like this. Kudos for that Clap

My heart actually went for Armaan. He is so easily targeted when such things happen, even in the real DMG. You brought in a both of the real DMG to your One Shot. I loved it

This was my all time favourite paragraph. I just loved it

 welcomed Ridhima's presence as a silver lining till she had spread her light to the very depth of my soul! Life would take its own course, the ups and downs were all welcome, the journey an inevitable joy with her to share it with!

I look forward to many many more One shots or FFs from you. You have done such a great job

SophSmile






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smriti.tweety

aishar IF-Dazzler
aishar
aishar

Joined: 27 June 2008
Posts: 2701

Posted: 28 October 2009 at 6:49am | IP Logged
nice try!!!!

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

smriti.tweety

smriti.tweety Senior Member
smriti.tweety
smriti.tweety

Joined: 13 August 2006
Posts: 238

Posted: 28 October 2009 at 7:26am | IP Logged
Originally posted by HannahF

Hiya SmritiSmile

Do forgive me, I cannot believe this one passed me. It was actually one of the best one shots, I have read till date. Thanks a lot Sophie! I am glad you think that way and no probs about missing it; I for one missed yours as well. :D

You cleverly go into the problem without actually describing what happened in a lot of detail. Again I am happy you didn't miss my dwelling too deep in the prob; for me it would have shifted the focus.And what I loved most!, is the way you accurately described their relationship. If I were Armaan, then I too at one point would have been able to feel the emptiness, of thinking that Riddhima would not come beside him, at a time like this. Kudos for that ClapAww... Soph.... it gives me real pleasure if the reader can identify with my attempt at showing Armaan humane.

My heart actually went for Armaan. He is so easily targeted when such things happen, even in the real DMG. You brought in a both of the real DMG to your One Shot. I loved it I know what you mean; Armaan has always been the target of misdirected wrath.

This was my all time favourite paragraph. I just loved it

 welcomed Ridhima's presence as a silver lining till she had spread her light to the very depth of my soul! Life would take its own course, the ups and downs were all welcome, the journey an inevitable joy with her to share it with!

I look forward to many many more One shots or FFs from you. You have done such a great job

SophSmile








Thanks a ton for the prompt reply Soph! I am ecstatic that you found it good! :D

Love!
smriti.tweety Senior Member
smriti.tweety
smriti.tweety

Joined: 13 August 2006
Posts: 238

Posted: 28 October 2009 at 7:27am | IP Logged
Originally posted by aishar

nice try!!!!


Thanks a lot! :D

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