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This weekend in DKD one of the question was 'How many women think that chivalry is dead?'. To this the comedian Dave Chappelle once gave a resoundingly witty answer 'Chivalry is dead! And Women killed it'
It makes one wonder what Chivalry really means and what the status of it is in our modern world. Old tales of Chivalry, come from the chivalrous knight in shining armor who alway came to the aide of the damsel in distress. Sir Walter Raleigh laying down his coat so that Queen Elizabeth not have to step in a puddle. Old Victorian romances speak of men who would do anything to protect the lady and preserve her honor.
However, the truth is the modern woman really does not want to be treated as the damsel in distress. She does not want to be considered or treated as weak, or one who needs help. She wants to be strong and independent and be on her own. Men who shield, protect and romance women this way are considered obsessive, smothering and disrespectful to her individuality. So it is true that from a certain point of view, women have indeed killed Chivalry.
Is it fair than of women to lament that it no longer exists?
Something else reminded me of this. Our farm manager's wife has been helping us in the office with paperwork recently. Last week a bouquet of flower arrived mysteriously. Her husband had sent it to her. It was no special occasion, no holiday, birthday, anniversary or any event of some sort, he just sent her flowers for the fun of it. I found from another co-worker that he often sends his wife flowers with no special occasion. They have teenage kids, but they still hold hands everywhere, they still have date nights and are new couple cuddly in public. Apparently he is of the firm belief that one has to constantly show such displays of affection to sustain the relationship. Had I not known them both, I would have assumed she was a smothered small town country wife whose life revolves around her husband. But she is quite independent, she models frequently for catalog ads, runs her own office cleaning service. I have to admit feeling a bit jealous wondering are such men for real.
So women - what does chivalry mean to you? Is it dead or alive? Did we women kill it? What do we honestly expect from men? Do we really want absolute independence or do we secretly want to be smothered and showered with affection and protection like the old school knight in shining armor days?
And men - what are your thoughts on chivalry? Do you think you are chivalrous? Do you try to be chivalrous? Do you think its important or not? What do you think will make women feel more loved and respected?
And all can chivalry and womens equality go hand in hand?
Also can women be chivalrous towards men, or people in general to each other? Does it have to be a male concept?
It makes one wonder what Chivalry really means and what the status of it is in our modern world. Old tales of Chivalry, come from the chivalrous knight in shining armor who alway came to the aide of the damsel in distress. Sir Walter Raleigh laying down his coat so that Queen Elizabeth not have to step in a puddle. Old Victorian romances speak of men who would do anything to protect the lady and preserve her honor.
However, the truth is the modern woman really does not want to be treated as the damsel in distress. She does not want to be considered or treated as weak, or one who needs help. She wants to be strong and independent and be on her own. Men who shield, protect and romance women this way are considered obsessive, smothering and disrespectful to her individuality. So it is true that from a certain point of view, women have indeed killed Chivalry.
Is it fair than of women to lament that it no longer exists?
Something else reminded me of this. Our farm manager's wife has been helping us in the office with paperwork recently. Last week a bouquet of flower arrived mysteriously. Her husband had sent it to her. It was no special occasion, no holiday, birthday, anniversary or any event of some sort, he just sent her flowers for the fun of it. I found from another co-worker that he often sends his wife flowers with no special occasion. They have teenage kids, but they still hold hands everywhere, they still have date nights and are new couple cuddly in public. Apparently he is of the firm belief that one has to constantly show such displays of affection to sustain the relationship. Had I not known them both, I would have assumed she was a smothered small town country wife whose life revolves around her husband. But she is quite independent, she models frequently for catalog ads, runs her own office cleaning service. I have to admit feeling a bit jealous wondering are such men for real.
So women - what does chivalry mean to you? Is it dead or alive? Did we women kill it? What do we honestly expect from men? Do we really want absolute independence or do we secretly want to be smothered and showered with affection and protection like the old school knight in shining armor days?
And men - what are your thoughts on chivalry? Do you think you are chivalrous? Do you try to be chivalrous? Do you think its important or not? What do you think will make women feel more loved and respected?
And all can chivalry and womens equality go hand in hand?
Also can women be chivalrous towards men, or people in general to each other? Does it have to be a male concept?
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