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Why divorce is so common these days

Khatarnak IF-Rockerz
Khatarnak
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Posted: 10 August 2009 at 1:46am | IP Logged
What are your thoughts:

- is it lack of commitment
- lack of understanding
- very high expectations
- Family pressure
- lack of tolerance

There could be any number of reasons for the rise in the divorce rate in recent times. One reason could be that divorce is more socially acceptable to more people now.  Another reason could be that fewer people belong to religions that oppose divorce and/or fewer people following rules of religion. Another factor could be that in the past more people stayed in situations that today are considered abusive, and the increased awareness of what constitutes abuse and why leaving is desirable, could play a rule as well.

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Posted: 10 August 2009 at 3:26am | IP Logged
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Summer3 IF-Stunnerz
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Posted: 10 August 2009 at 7:44am | IP Logged
Interesting. some of the reasons in USA for divorce
Common reasons that cause people to think about or want to get a divorce:
    Couple has conflicting personal beliefs
    Couple's marital satisfaction decreases
    Desertion
    Adultery
    Cruel treatment
    Bigamy
    Imprisonment
    Spousal Indignities
    Institutionalization
  • Irretrievable Breakdown of some kind

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Meena1

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Fair-n-luvly IF-Sizzlerz
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Posted: 10 August 2009 at 10:29am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Khatarnak

What are your thoughts:

- is it lack of commitment
- lack of understanding
- very high expectations
- Family pressure
- lack of tolerance

There could be any number of reasons for the rise in the divorce rate in recent times. One reason could be that divorce is more socially acceptable to more people now.  Another reason could be that fewer people belong to religions that oppose divorce and/or fewer people following rules of religion. Another factor could be that in the past more people stayed in situations that today are considered abusive, and the increased awareness of what constitutes abuse and why leaving is desirable, could play a rule as well.
I guess all the reasons which you 've stated above can be the reason....but men find pleasure in divorcing their wives sometimes just to show their so called men power.


Edited by mahikhan - 10 August 2009 at 10:32am
baz786 IF-Sizzlerz
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Posts: 13805

Posted: 10 August 2009 at 12:45pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Khatarnak

What are your thoughts:

- is it lack of commitment
- lack of understanding
- very high expectations
- Family pressure
- lack of tolerance

There could be any number of reasons for the rise in the divorce rate in recent times. One reason could be that divorce is more socially acceptable to more people now.  Another reason could be that fewer people belong to religions that oppose divorce and/or fewer people following rules of religion. Another factor could be that in the past more people stayed in situations that today are considered abusive, and the increased awareness of what constitutes abuse and why leaving is desirable, could play a rule as well.


basically all the reasons u stated above. one has to think alot about the above reasons before marriage is even considered coz marriage shud be a once in a lifetime experience and that shud be it
return_to_hades IF-Veteran Member
return_to_hades
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Posted: 10 August 2009 at 1:05pm | IP Logged

In the past across all cultures more marriages were arranged. Even in progressive cultures women were still the weaker sex and dependent on the men. Many were uneducated, confined to their homes, not socially mingled. That's why most women accepted their fate as is and did not dare to risk their marriage in any way. People were expected to make marriages work and sacrifice for the sake of their community or family. Men and women both would feel compelled to overlook major ideological differences and conflicts. Marriages also took place within certain social spheres, communities or within specific regions so there were not as many background differences to overcome.

 

The most significant and important change is that women are no longer dependent on their husbands or families. Women who end up in unhappy marriages are not hesitant to get out of it. Another aspect with women being more independent is that some men are taken aback by their independence. Various issues like career, education, income, past relationships, socialization come up, and people who are unable to sort that friction end up divorcing.

 

Society has also grown a lot more individualistic. People no longer feel compelled to self sacrifice their interests for the sake of their family. People are more quick to speak up or conflict over differences and make certain demands. In old fashioned marriages if people dislike habits, or feel neglected, are offended by attitudes they would deal with it – nowadays people will speak up – hey I need you to spend more time with us, I wish you did not throw your clothes about or leave the kitchen in a mess, I wish you would be so arrogant to people. If such differences are unsorted it ends up in divorce.

 

Finally with cross cultural relationships you have a lot of background differences. People are crossing wider barriers like religion, class, country, culture. These barriers make marriages more difficult. People think they can cross them, but in practice it can be hard. Even people married for several years are unable to sustain the marriage when their spouses jobs take them to different countries. In the past one person would deal with it, but nowadays fewer people will accept to be alienated in a new culture.

 

In many aspects the ability to divorce is a positive change and trend. Compatibility is essential on physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual levels for any relationship. A happy marriage and family needs there to be genuine love, compatibility, compromise and commitment. In the past many marriages existed as arranged institutions. People stuck together simply due to obligation, they had no love for their spouses or genuine happiness or interest in the marriage or family. I'm not saying that loving happy marriages did not exist, but a large number of people would remain married for the sake of it –and that's not the best situation. Divorce has allowed the ability to end poor, abusive relationships as well as farcial relationships.

 

However, it is true that too many people take divorce for granted. Sometimes people selfishly ignore the simplest of compromises and pick arguments for divorce for the smallest reason. People are also not thinking enough before marriage. They get carried away by the spur of emotions and the romanticism of the relationship – that they do not think through if they can genuinely sustain that relationship.

 

Marriage is no game. Think twice before making a decision. Take the step only when you are ready to make that commitment to the rest of your life. But if you make the mistake, own up right away – don't wait till its too late and there are too many hurt sentiments.

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