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Great truths!!

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dolly1211

Goldie

dolly1211

Joined: 29 August 2004

Posts: 1089

Posted: 23 January 2005 at 11:07pm | IP Logged

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1)    You believe in Santa Claus.
2)    You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3)    You are Santa Claus.
4)    You look like Santa Claus.

SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.

At age 12 success is . . . having friends.

At age 17 success is . . . having a drivers license.

At age 35 success is . . . having money.

At age 50 success is . . . having money.

At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.

At age 75 success is . . . having friends.

At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.

Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.

Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way; BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.

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-misha

IF-Sizzlerz

-misha

Joined: 23 November 2004

Posts: 11779

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 5:54am | IP Logged
LOL LOL

sweetyvk

Senior Member

sweetyvk

Joined: 03 December 2004

Posts: 257

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 2:50pm | IP Logged
LOL....true true

meghavi

IF-Veteran Member

meghavi

Joined: 21 November 2004

Posts: 8270

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 3:52pm | IP Logged
THanks for saring!LOL

Tishy_Fishy

Senior Member

Tishy_Fishy

Joined: 10 January 2005

Posts: 315

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 4:27pm | IP Logged
lol cute

mango

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mango

Joined: 08 December 2004

Posts: 9185

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 4:39pm | IP Logged
LOL

rabeeak2003

IF-Dazzler

rabeeak2003

Joined: 26 August 2004

Posts: 3898

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 5:10pm | IP Logged
omg, those ae hilarious!LOL

|Persephone|

IF-Veteran Member

|Persephone|

BollyCurry Director

Joined: 30 October 2004

Posts: 13770

Posted: 24 January 2005 at 6:29pm | IP Logged
LOL

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