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Anyone said 143 and proposed marriage together?

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desertfox

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desertfox

Joined: 31 March 2009

Posts: 3

Posted: 01 April 2009 at 12:03am | IP Logged
Especially on a first date has anybody done this?....I like a girl for more than 2 years now and we pretty know everything about each other. Never went out on a date but met her 3-4 times in groups coz her friends are my buddies. There is a lot of teasing around either side. I'm kinda thinking hard about it if it is okay to say ILU and propose marriage together. Is it too aggresive? Why I ask is the girl comes from a family of traditions and dating is kinda taboo. Definitely I'm expecting she'll say she has to talk to her parents and all..but Im ok with that coz I come from a respected family too. She is not against love marraiges but kinda resigned that since nothing has happened till now its obvious that she'll get into arranged marriage. My question here is ...is it okay to pop them both together at a time? Btw, we are goin to meet in private in the near future for sure. Btw, its gonna be my first relationship and will be a first for her as well.

Ur opinions will surely help or give an me an idea for sure atleast. Thanks guys in advance.

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blairwaldorf

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blairwaldorf

Joined: 25 October 2008

Posts: 263

Posted: 01 April 2009 at 7:48am | IP Logged
you never even went out on a date.
unless the girl really really really likes you, in which case she'd have told you or explicitly hinted to you, chances are she'd turn you down.
get to know her.
give it at least 9-10 months between saying ILY and proposing.
don't be insecure about telling her how you feel; i sense you are rather insecure since you want her to either love+marry you or cut everything off completely.
loads of times girls just want guys to make the first move because they expect them to.
good luck!

dream

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dream

Joined: 18 February 2005

Posts: 3334

Posted: 01 April 2009 at 9:24am | IP Logged
first of all be her frnd..then try to und her & make her und ur feelings..then u shud express ur love through ur behaviour n then if u feel she also likes u n u both can spend the whole life together then say u love her & propose her fr marriage !

desertfox

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desertfox

Joined: 31 March 2009

Posts: 3

Posted: 01 April 2009 at 11:13am | IP Logged
Originally posted by blairwaldorf

you never even went out on a date.
unless the girl really really really likes you, in which case she'd have told you or explicitly hinted to you, chances are she'd turn you down.
get to know her.
give it at least 9-10 months between saying ILY and proposing.
don't be insecure about telling her how you feel; i sense you are rather insecure since you want her to either love+marry you or cut everything off completely.
loads of times girls just want guys to make the first move because they expect them to.
good luck!


She is in the US and will get back in sometime.  I'm based out of India as well but have interests in India and travel quite often. She has pressure of getting married at home already but surely wont until 2010. Btw, I have enough cues from her to understand there is definitely something goin on between us. Tell out, I've been chatting with her for more than 2 hours a day for few months now and have helped her in her work(btw, she detests use and throw people). No I'm not insecure and will surely let ma feelings known and one of the princples I live by in life is never cutt off anything completely in life and that includes my enemies. Its a bit complicated than proposing here because her family is into astrology compatibility and all. My family is into it as well...caste and religion is not a problem since we are the same. What her ideal match described by her parents perfectly fits the bill and I'm sure my parents are perfectly qualified.  Im not sure how to go about it. Her parents and my parents are our each other's best friends. Normally I would just ILU and say why I love her and all. But here time is running out, it needs to be approved by her parents, need to be astrologically compatible and all. And I for one will do anything to keep her image,respect in soceity irrespective of whether it works our or not.

My gut feeling says that I should tell her that ILH more than anyting and would like to take it to the next level immediately with her parents and my parents approval, and any other shortcomings. I'm certain she will be unable to date without a commitment because of soceity.

Does this approach sound ok guys?

xsweetbabygyalx

Senior Member

xsweetbabygyalx

Joined: 17 July 2008

Posts: 252

Posted: 03 April 2009 at 10:20pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by desertfox

Especially on a first date has anybody done this?....I like a girl for more than 2 years now and we pretty know everything about each other. Never went out on a date but met her 3-4 times in groups coz her friends are my buddies. There is a lot of teasing around either side. I'm kinda thinking hard about it if it is okay to say ILU and propose marriage together. Is it too aggresive? Why I ask is the girl comes from a family of traditions and dating is kinda taboo. Definitely I'm expecting she'll say she has to talk to her parents and all..but Im ok with that coz I come from a respected family too. She is not against love marraiges but kinda resigned that since nothing has happened till now its obvious that she'll get into arranged marriage. My question here is ...is it okay to pop them both together at a time? Btw, we are goin to meet in private in the near future for sure. Btw, its gonna be my first relationship and will be a first for her as well.

Ur opinions will surely help or give an me an idea for sure atleast. Thanks guys in advance.
I'm a girl so I can't comment on this much but can advice u. Don't propose her directly, start of very simple. Ask her if she plans to live with you forever and if she says yes, tell her you are hoping her to be your wife....this should give her the hint......proposing her on a first date can possibly scare her.....start slowly.....give her a red rose which should give her the hint that you love her and if you give a bouquet of 15 red roses, that should give her the hint you are willing to marry her.....dont tell her that you love her in exact words because it can mess up your relationship with her.
 
Best Of Luck

desertfox

Newbie

desertfox

Joined: 31 March 2009

Posts: 3

Posted: 04 April 2009 at 6:11am | IP Logged
Originally posted by xsweetbabygyalx

Originally posted by desertfox

Especially on a first date has anybody done this?....I like a girl for more than 2 years now and we pretty know everything about each other. Never went out on a date but met her 3-4 times in groups coz her friends are my buddies. There is a lot of teasing around either side. I'm kinda thinking hard about it if it is okay to say ILU and propose marriage together. Is it too aggresive? Why I ask is the girl comes from a family of traditions and dating is kinda taboo. Definitely I'm expecting she'll say she has to talk to her parents and all..but Im ok with that coz I come from a respected family too. She is not against love marraiges but kinda resigned that since nothing has happened till now its obvious that she'll get into arranged marriage. My question here is ...is it okay to pop them both together at a time? Btw, we are goin to meet in private in the near future for sure. Btw, its gonna be my first relationship and will be a first for her as well.

Ur opinions will surely help or give an me an idea for sure atleast. Thanks guys in advance.
I'm a girl so I can't comment on this much but can advice u. Don't propose her directly, start of very simple. Ask her if she plans to live with you forever and if she says yes, tell her you are hoping her to be your wife....this should give her the hint......proposing her on a first date can possibly scare her.....start slowly.....give her a red rose which should give her the hint that you love her and if you give a bouquet of 15 red roses, that should give her the hint you are willing to marry her.....dont tell her that you love her in exact words because it can mess up your relationship with her.
 
Best Of Luck


Thnx :) Your reply and advice is greatly appreciated. )

xsweetbabygyalx

Senior Member

xsweetbabygyalx

Joined: 17 July 2008

Posts: 252

Posted: 04 April 2009 at 5:11pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by desertfox

[QUOTE=xsweetbabygyalx][QUOTE=desertfox]

Thnx :) Your reply and advice is greatly appreciated. )
n/p Smile on a first date, give her one red rose and then tell her that u are planning to spend ur life with her forever.....that should hopefully give her the hint.
 
from my personal experience, my boyfriend gave me a hint of him loving me then 5 to 7 months later he kinda proposed in a completely different way where i got confused but luckily understood his hidden words.....i can tell u the trick he used......he didnt tell me 143 in exact words, he basically expressed how i made him feel Embarrassed then 5 to 7 months later, he said he's looking for a desi bride when he actually meant was "i am looking forward in marrying you" LOL
 
go slowly.....on a first date, use the red rose trick.....talk about ur future plans with her....i.e. "i am ready to settle down with my wife" or anything you want to say but remember to give her a mystery, don't tell her that you love her and want to marry her right away.....that is gonna get u upset.
 
JEALOUSY TESTS.....throw her a jealousy test BEFORE asking her out to ensure yourself if she loves you back or not.....talk about her to her but switch her name around.....for example, suppose her name is Anjali.....switch her name to JAANI.....then say "i really like this girl named Jaani, i am planning on marrying her" bla bla bla....this will automatically get her jealous then when u laugh out loud, she is obviously gonna get confused then tell her "i was talking about you to you" while laughing....also talk about ur favorite Hollywood or Bollywood actress being beautiful if u dont want to talk about her to her.....that trick can also do the trick.
 
just remember one thing on your dates with her.....don't tell her right away you planning on marrying her.....ask her if she plans spending her life forever with you.....discuss your and her future together.....bounce hers and your ideas back and forth.
 
Best of Luck.....

-Mystery-

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-Mystery-

BollyCurry Buzzers

Joined: 31 August 2007

Posts: 20130

Posted: 05 April 2009 at 1:37pm | IP Logged
All advice related topics belong to Advice Corner and not Love and Relationships forum even though they are related to love.

Moving it to Advice Corner.

-Mahi

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