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Why do i find my self acting fake? (Page 2)

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Jess.

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Jess.

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Posted: 14 November 2008 at 5:15pm | IP Logged
I wouldn't say its faking...your friends just bring out the outgoing and crazy side of you! like me...im quiet and reserved when im by myself...but with my friends, im just crazy and talkative! i guess i have fun doing funny and crazy things with them...and if sometimes you dont want to hang out with them then maybe you guys hang out too much...its normal...happens to me all the time...we go back to normal in no time. i think when you are always around the same people you feel tired and annoyed...so you dont have to hang out with them when you dont want to...its okay to say no.
 
i hoped i helped in any way....=]
 
jessie

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h&rblock

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h&rblock

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Posted: 18 November 2008 at 11:24am | IP Logged
I used to be like that & I realised that I did that only because I wanted to be liked & accepted by my peers, as I grew older, I realised it was more important for people to like me for who I am not who I could be, so I decided to be myself & if people didn't like me for who I really am, then it was their loss. I found so much happiness & true friends since I took on this attitude, friends who have still stuck around 15 years later...

angel#9

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angel#9

Joined: 26 March 2008

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Posted: 27 November 2008 at 11:34pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Neelu.RoX

Okay so i have 2  groups of friends whom i hang out with on a daily basis.
But when i hang out with one, i act totally different. And when i hang out with the other , i act different. And when i am at home i act different and actulley feel like myself.

I feel like I act fake just to fit in, and i dont know why i do that. It just happens. My sister even asked why do you act so different when you are around different people.

Why do i do this? And how do i stop? I dont act like myself, that's why sometimes i get tired of hanging out with them and just want to stay home...If i act like myself, i am scared, they'll think im annoying, or something...

Any suggestions?Ouch
 
i learnt about this in psychology... its a stage everyone goes through, its part of finding your identity so don't worry about it but just remember true friends will love for who you really are not who ur trying to be

aish_punk

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aish_punk

Joined: 11 January 2008

Posts: 20622

Posted: 30 November 2008 at 7:36am | IP Logged
Yeah I exprience d same thng..I feel it hppns wid evry1..wen u r wid sum1...u hv 2 behave lykk ow dey r n ow dey lykk it..if u don lyk behavin tat way..leave em!!

prachi4AJ

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prachi4AJ

Joined: 24 July 2005

Posts: 3278

Posted: 25 December 2008 at 2:15pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Neelu.RoX

Okay so i have 2  groups of friends whom i hang out with on a daily basis.
But when i hang out with one, i act totally different. And when i hang out with the other , i act different. And when i am at home i act different and actulley feel like myself.

I feel like I act fake just to fit in, and i dont know why i do that. It just happens. My sister even asked why do you act so different when you are around different people.

Why do i do this? And how do i stop? I dont act like myself, that's why sometimes i get tired of hanging out with them and just want to stay home...If i act like myself, i am scared, they'll think im annoying, or something...

Any suggestions?Ouch
 
What impresses me abt u neelu is dat u r NOT in denial of dis situation of urs,which automatically gets u outta d " fake " category of ppl..so stop thinkin dat way first.
and u knw all of us multiple personalities hidden inside us but they r usuallly in a suppressed form in in our " ego " and " superego " part of d conscious and d sub sonscious brain and its generally one personality dat surfaces on our Id ( conscious ) but dis is not d case always....different personalities can stem up in response to different situations,circumstances,thoughts,moods and sets of people around u,it is a just d defence mechanism of our body thru which it tries to adjust its level best wid d present lot its facing by brining up d most closely-related personality it can to d influencing factor in question....though in sum ppl muktiple personalities r too varied,and turn up abruptly w.o. ay rhyme or reason due to certain factors such as genetic illnesses and past emotional stresses.....but i dnt think dats d case wid u....u r jst like all of us and maybe jst a li'l more spontaneous in bringin up ur versatile sides....try to just make it seem more subtle,less influnced and smoother so dat it isnt too in-ur-face kinds...rest I guess u'll be in fact benifittin frm ur instantaneously adaptive nature if u handle it d rite way


Edited by prachi4AJ - 25 December 2008 at 2:16pm

thejasseffect

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thejasseffect

Joined: 25 December 2008

Posts: 38

Posted: 25 December 2008 at 8:26pm | IP Logged
I have the same issue, but it doesn't bother me. i guess ur a peoples person? :S

umrao_jaan

Goldie

umrao_jaan

Joined: 11 January 2006

Posts: 1212

Posted: 26 December 2008 at 6:35am | IP Logged
Believe it or not-thet's a very common situation. Didn't Shakespeare say something like,
"The world's a stage and, men and women the actors."

We all act to some extend or other. In reality, you NEED to do a bit of play acting to adapt yourself to SURVIVE! Do you behave the same way with your mother and sis?

An extended version of that is happening to you. After a certain limit it becomes a burden. I can understand, as I used to be this totally shy, reserved character in public and a much more outgoing, bold person in private.

Its really the simple problem of lack of self expression, but the solution is not so simple.

IThe first think is to REALIZE who YOU are. Realize your strenghts and weaknesses, likes and dislikes. Make an image of the person you'd love to be-to everyone. That may seem easy-but try it out-write it on a piece of paper.

Then-PUT it to ACTION. Its great you feel yourself at home. Take it out to school. For example I had a problem putting out my rather 'controversial' ideas in public-one day I just let go of all my caution and let my tongue do the talk and have not looked back since!

Wow! You have two sets of friends! That's great. Try to merge them together. Sit with a friend each set for lunch, tell about a great book one has to another, or a great skirt, or a great video. A lot of your problems will get solved then!

Just be yourself! It may not seem easy-but, thats what's needed!

Good Luck!!Clap

Ophelia

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Ophelia

Joined: 22 December 2005

Posts: 1072

Posted: 27 December 2008 at 8:22pm | IP Logged
People spend their whole lives trying to discover their inner selves.
 
It's perfectly alright to have multiple personalities because at a certain stage we all try to adapt ourselves accordingly to please others.

Your still young but try to devote some time just being with yourself try to evaluate how you've acted versus how you really wanted to act.  Try to project the first thought that comes to your mind instead of what people want to hear. Meditation is a good way to allow your mind to concentrate on your inner thoughts.

I'm glad you came to the realization that at the end it's most important to please the self than other people.




Edited by Megha25 - 27 December 2008 at 8:26pm

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