SOTW6: Friends unwanted judgement.

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Posted: 15 years ago

Hey Guys,😳

Carrying on from Hot Topic of the Week/Situation of the Week,

Here is the next situation ( For everyone's information, not relevant to any one in particular's life- Not based on any post from here- just what comes into my mind as a wide issue concerning lots-all names just exist for the purpose of this post!)

So the Situation is like this....

Boyfriend: Raj

Girlfriend: Anya

Friend of Anya: Payal

Common friend of Anya and Payal - Rahul

Anya and Raj have been going out for a very long time 😳 Payal is one of Anya's greatest friend.

When Anya and Raj got together, Payal was already with her own Bf, so seemed happy enough of Anya

when she got together with her Bf.

However soon after Payal split from her own BF and Anya was there for Payal A lot!

So a few months later, One of Payal and Anya's friend rahul was angry on Payal for being mean to him and blowing him out when he brought her tickets for a concert as birthday treat which she agreed to go to and now has refused as she wants to go to her friends Party.

So while upset, Rahul confided in Anya, and Anya agreed with Rahul that Payal is being mean. During this convo Rahul tells Anya about all the mean things she has said about Anya a few months before, and also a few things she said about Anya's Bf.

Anya is pretty furious, but doesnt want to confront Payal as

Rahul confided in her and this was a secret

Anya doesnt want to start any fight with Payal

She said all this in the past also - so is ther eany point in beinging it out now.

So What does Anya do? She is angry upon her friend bitching about her and rahul, as she has no right to judge her relationship with Rahul. Should she confront Payal or leave it and move on? As Anya feels that if she can not trust her own friend then who can she trust and confide in if Payal is bitching behind her back.

So advice team, what advice whould you give to her?

Start advising the Anya/Raj's of this world😳

Love

Advice Corner Dev Team.😊

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Frequent Posters

382868

Inactive

Posted: 15 years ago

i have deleted too..

i will add/edit it laterz too.

i didnt' know.sorry.
Edited by Huduga - 15 years ago

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Mahi

@-Mystery-

IF-Sizzlerz

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

I think Anya should confront Payal. The point is that none of can just forget without clearing up things. No matter what one says about "Oh I don't care, it's past and whatever's done is done" It's not going to take things out of their minds.

Anya can pretend that nothing happened and she heard nothing from Rahul but deep in her heart, she'll always hold this grudge against Payal for saying all that stuff behind her back. If she was truly her friend then she could've said all those things on her face.

Also, since Rahul is mad at Payal he could've been making stuff up so Anya sympathizes with him more or whatever.

Whatever the reason maybe it's really important that she does sort out the entire matter. She should confront Payal and talk about it. She should also ask Rahul to sort out all the problems he has with Payal and saying anything behind her back to her best friend is not right.

All three of them should openly talk and then whatever the result is, it'll be best for all of them.

-Mahi

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Jess.

@Jess.

IF-Sizzlerz

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

Anya should confront Payal and ask her if she really did say things behind her back. Who knows if Rahul was telling the truth. Since he is Anya and Payal's friend maybe he was telling the truth, but Anya wont know until she confronts Payal.

If Anya doesnt do anything about this, there is going to be a grudge against Payal in her heart. What would be the point? because of this grudge Payal and Anya would slowly grow far apart. Anya wouldnt have Payal's back whenever Payal needs it.

Anya has done so much for Payal, so Anya deserves to know If and why Payal has said this.

-Jessie

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griffy.fz

@griffy.fz

IF-Rockerz

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

great SOTW anon!!

hmmm...today only i endeda cold war with sum1 it was 'cuz of this type misunderstanding some1 had told me that this person had told bad stuff abt me..and without thinking..i fought iwth that person i didnt even confront her ...i was at fault and one thing led to another.......and i lost ma frien....by listening to others.....

anyways....i guess anya shud politely confront her......speak stronlgy yet softly.....and see wats the truth....+ she shudnt get carried away...one shud do their own judgement

thats all love griffyEdited by griffinmonster - 15 years ago

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338669

Inactive

Posted: 15 years ago

Well I think that Anya should ask Payal if this is true.If she says No then she should tell her that Rahul told all this to me whom you told crap about. Then if she really had said that then Anya should ask her why she thinks so, & even if she feels soo she should tell her on the face as shes her friend. She would more like telling her to improve rather then insulting her. If she was a good friend she could have done that. This is just a face of reality i've talked about.

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thejasseffect

@thejasseffect

Newbie

Posted: 15 years ago

this kind of stufff really confuses me soo mnay namess! lol. srry

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